meh. Fantasy Football 2023-2024

@Lisa102503 true story, in a past year, I believe “someone” drafted 3 kickers. Someone is in quotes because there have been suggestions (mostly/all by me) this person is not a real person.

@zinimusprime @sammydog01sounds like coaches should not only be eligible to be drafted but required.

@tohar1 I like everything about the traveling trophy.

@zinimusprime Then, I shall make it happen. I’m going to add something to it to celebrate my time with the “prize” & then happily pass it along…
(I’ll just need some help with the address of the next victim, when the time comes.)

@njfan I’m in it to win it (or not)!!

@njfan I joined!

@njfan It feels weird getting this set up before the last minute…

@njfan I’m in!

@tohar1, @sammydog01,@metaphore, @zinimusprime - we are five teams strong, woohoo!

I can open it up to the rest of our fellow mehtizens. Just curious, what do you guys and gals want the cap to be on the number of teams?

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime also, feel free to invite others. Like friends or children who are definitely not invisible, haha.

@metaphore @njfan @tohar1 @zinimusprime Just sent the link to dragontrainer (my real actual daughter, really).

Maybe a cap of 10 or 12? 16 team seasons make me sad and desperate.

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 @zinimusprime 10-12 teams in two divisions/conferences. That way everyone plays everyone else at least once.

@njfan @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime
10-12 or smaller is ideal imo. If we get more interest than that, splitting into 2 smaller leagues instead of 1 giant one would be my preference.

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime I went 12. If we get only 11, I’ll remove myself and give you all a chance to win cause I’m a nice guy.

@metaphore @njfan @tohar1 @zinimusprime If we get 11 you get two teams!

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime we have six teams. I don’t know about everyone else, but I’m not opposed to a weekly o/u of 240 point matchup! I’ll give it another week before locking it up.

Any blackout days for drafting? I was thinking some time over labor day weekend.

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 @zinimusprime I’m good with that weekend for holding the draft…but then I live a rather boring life, unlike most other people…I even have a 4-day weekend then.

@njfan @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime If we ended up with a smaller league, we should add some extra starters. 2QB, an extra flex, something to make more players valuable.

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 @tohar1 I’m good with a 6 team league and all sorts of funky stuff.

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 @tohar1 I can only do Saturday or Monday night of Labor Day weekend. I am a man in demand.

@njfan @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime I’ve always wanted to do a league where penalties count against the player/defense but it seemed too hard to figure out a fair way to implement and would require scoring by hand.

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime

2QBs - done!
2Flex - done!
Penalties for bad defense - done!
That last one was already done. Negative points awarded above 350 total yards given up and more than 28 points given up.

@metaphore @sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime

Draft for Saturday at 3pm EDT? I can do whenever but not everyone has as crazy a social life as I do .

@metaphore @njfan @tohar1 @zinimusprime I plan on auto drafting so any time is fine for me. I actually have a ticket to a college game that day.

@njfan I guess that’s almost the same thing, since yards lost to penalties count as yards given up. But I think it would also be fun if like offsides and unsportsmanlike would give negative points to receivers, but since that’s not built in options it would be hard to track/score.

I plan on auto drafting so any time is fine for me. I actually have a
ticket to a college game that day.

@sammydog01 - are you sure? That is pretty late in the preseason for the Dallas Cowboys to have a game.

@njfan with the extra starters you’re letting us have, the bench might need to get a bit deeper

@metaphore
/giphy deal!

@njfan i’m in as long as i don’t have to do anything. i think i did pretty well last time using that strategy. (well, being a relative term)

@carl669 You can do as much or as little as you want .

@njfan
/giphy join us

@njfan Dragontrainer told me it moved. I keep forgetting to check that email. I will probably be watching. Maybe I’ll pass on Jonathon Taylor if he pops up first round. Last year was bad.

@sammydog01 I want to make a joke but I did say I would try best not to make those types of jokes anymore. Trying is hard.

@njfan Does that mean I’m going to win with my three kickers?

@njfan maybe auto draft was the way to go

@sammydog01 1. If you are projected for second place with three kickers, ESPN or FOX Sports may be reaching out to you in the near future. 2. You might want to check your roster. Landry mentioned it’s no fun having three kickers so I dropped it to two. I made the adjustment after the draft.

@metaphore @njfan Well dragontrainer was in the car with me.

@njfan @sammydog01 instead of making us get rid of kickers just add them as an option for the flex. Why not let someone play 3 kickers?

@metaphore @sammydog01 welp, too late for that now. Not a bad idea though.

@sammydog01
/giphy hahahahaha

@sammydog01 Personally, I hate that kickers lose points at all for missed field goals. It’s not their fault witnesses the team asks them to try an impossible kick.

@metaphore I guess it’s setup so that missing really long kicks doesn’t cost as many points as missing shorter kicks which makes sense. But missing a 59 yarder is -3 and missing a 39 is -5. Plus points after touchdown are now negative. Maybe I need to see a few more weeks but this seems like an overall loss in kicker points.

Then again Folk scored 18.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@sammydog01 It seems like we have a lot more ways to lose points now. Josh Allen lost 15, 5 of which were for being sacked.

@metaphore Looks like a recovered fumble is -1 and a lost fumble is -3. I should have read the scoring rules, not that it would have changed who I played.

DIFFERENT IS FINE. REALLY.
/giphy i hate change

@metaphore @sammydog01
sorry everyone, your GM/champion has been asleep at the wheel. Can you guys, gals, pronoun of your choice, tell me what adjustments to make:

@metaphore @njfan I’m only whining because I’m losing. The scoring is fine the way it is. I could have sworn that there was a one point deduction in addition to those- is that right?

@metaphore @sammydog01

I don’t think so. Maybe?
/giphy i dunno

@sammydog01 did i win the sportsball thingie?

ironically, my kid just started flag football last weekend. i taught him to throw a decent spiral, but we’re working more on accuracy than distance so his range is only 10yds right now. his catching is coming along nicely as well. next step, teach him some routes.

@carl669 That’s great! You should also have him watch a Dolphins game with you and brag about owning the quarterback. (I used to watch Dolphins game with my dad.)

@sammydog01 The wide receiver I picked up with my #2 waiver order scored 31 points. And I still lost.

@metaphore Aaron Rodgers FTW?

EDIT: FTL.

@pmarin Indeed. At least he was my forth QB.

@sammydog01 this sounds like a lot of work.

@sammydog01 What you call loyalty, I call “I’m an idiot”.

@sammydog01 I second the appreciation. While basking in the glow of your awesomeness, could you please up the positional limits for skill players? With such a big bench it makes it hard to juggle skill players.

@metaphore I got both of mine. Sometimes being a loser is nice.

@sammydog01 I’m already in the “pleasantly surprised” mode everytime I win

@metaphore I only need 85 points tonight to win.
/giphy piece of cake

@sammydog01 It would appear that the app and the browser calculate things a little differently, at least as far as predictions go. Before the games started the app gave you a 1% chance of a comeback, but in the browser it gave you 4%.

@metaphore I’ll win next week for sure. Wait I’m playing @njfan. When do I get to play @carl669?

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 oh sure. pick on the guy that doesn’t do anything at all with his team

@carl669 @metaphore @njfan You played three guys who were out and still beat me by 30 points.
/giphy table flip

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01

@josegarciajr lol

@sammydog01 Is there? The projections for final standings has you falling to last place. Not letting you keep your 3 kickers just tanked you.
Am I gonna have to give my loser banner back?

@metaphore They also had me coming in first- shows how much they know.

@sammydog01 damnit, Lucy!

@sammydog01 Highest score of the week, by a lot(probably). Maybe you’re still in this.

@njfan @metaphore My players decided to go off at the same time instead of one at a time which would have won me more games.
/giphy I WON

@sammydog01 my apologies to Dragontrainer. but, if you can’t take of heat of the guy that does nothing in fantasy football, get out of the guy who does nothing in fantasy football’s weirdly warm for October in Minnesota’s kitchen.

@sammydog01 At least he wasn’t played against you. That would have really sucked.

@metaphore It would have been sad. That’s a game winning score.

@metaphore

@carl669 @metaphore Yes- it was ladies (and Carl) week.

@carl669 You’re currently tied for second. The lack of effort is working out for you.

@metaphore

@carl669 @metaphore You have two guys on injured reserve and two on bye this week. If @metaphore loses she will never live this down.

@metaphore @sammydog01 i have who on what now?

@carl669 @sammydog01 The odds are not as far in my favor as I would expect with him missing half his team.

@carl669 @metaphore Boo-boos and vacation. Sorry I used the technical terms.

@sammydog01 I picked up Mac Jones mostly because everyone was being so mean to him and calling him like the worst quarterback ever(which looking at the past few weeks is fair) but he did ok for a few games. Now that his coach has given up on the whole team I don’t know if he will do any better.
At least you have the most stylish QB.

@metaphore Does Mac Jones even own a sword?

We have to be careful because of the scoring in our league. They were recommending Daniel Jones because he had gotten 10 points the week before- I checked and he had -3. Most leagues don’t count sacks and he had 10, and I think fumbles were scored differently. Sam Howell gets sacked a ridiculous number of times too.

@metaphore this is how I know AI isn’t ready to take over the world yet.

@carl669 @metaphore It got me 3 kickers with the same bye week. Stupid computers.

@metaphore. Damn I play @carl669 next week.

@sammydog01

Also did you see GardnerMinshew scored 35 points? I LOVE THAT GUY.

@Tohar1 do you need me to remind you that it’s Sunday? It looked like you forgot last week.

@tohar1 Taylor Swift has a boyfriend? I hadn’t heard.

@njfan Yeah…Y’know…Old What’s His Name…
I think he plays for one of the mid-country teams.

@njfan I didn’t even do that bad this week. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do when my Tight End is my top scorer for the week.

/giphy shame

@metaphore @njfan Fun fact, six of the eight teams in our league have a losing record and @carl669 is not one of them.

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01

@tohar1 Not me, are you playing our manager this week? He needs a win.

@sammydog01 I think he felt sorry for me as I was sitting on the sidelines, licking my wounds after my team’s last week performance. (It did let me on 10-minutes or so before game time, so I got a few changes made…)

@carl669 You led @njfan to a humiliating loss. Am I the only one who can beat you?
/giphy humiliation

@njfan @sammydog01 my apologies @njfan. i swear, i tried my absolute least.

@sammydog01 so it was your tackle that broke his shoulder. You are not to be messed with.

@njfan I’m pretty sure it was karma.

@sammydog01 The week started with me as like a 30 point underdog so I figured I actually had a chance this week. It’s been kinda a weird season so far but I was still caught off-guard by Jacksonville having the best win streak right now.

@metaphore Someone other than @carl669 needs to beat that Landry guy- I’m not even sure of his username.

@metaphore @sammydog01 hey now. what’s wrong with the lazy guy beating him?

you’re an all-star

@carl669 @metaphore Nothing, it’s just that he’s only lost one game. He needs to be more of a loser.
/giphy it’s not fair

@sammydog01 My faith in the raiders was misplaced.

@davin0halligann Hey spammer, we’re Americans here.

@sammydog01 thanks! it warms my cockles to know someone is paying attention for me. good luck to Dragontrainer this week! i’ll be doing my usual nothing, so i’d say she stands a fair to middlin’ chance

@carl669
/giphy I care

@sammydog01 Any day now my team is gonna hit comeback mode.

@metaphore My quarterbacks barely scored 10 points between them, I tried to help.

@carl669 @sammydog01 hi, that’s it.

just hi

 _______
< weird >
 -------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||

@carl669 @Yoda_Daenerys
/giphy Hi back at you

@sammydog01 @Yoda_Daenerys

The Eagles did not, in fact, fly. Congrats @njfan.

@sammydog01 so, you’re saying i was the best of the worst?

@carl669 As of now @ziminusprime is the best of the worst- you didn’t even win there. There’s still time though.

@sammydog01 fucking hell man. fucking hell.

@carl669 You need to stop doing stuff like this if you want to be in last place:

@sammydog01

@carl669 @sammydog01 I love being the best of the worst, it’s my groove.

@sammydog01 The last spot is clinched yet, @carl669 still has a chance at the play offs, he just needs to outscore @tohar1 by 310 points this week.

@carl669 @metaphore @sammydog01 Not saying that it can’t happen, but I like my chances.

@carl669 @sammydog01 …and don’t forget, I have a special prize for whomever ends up in LAST PLACE!! Traveling “trophy” which will be bequeathed to the lucky person!!

@carl669 @tohar1 He still has to beat me. I really hope I don’t lose, it would be humiliating.

@carl669 @tohar1 Looks like @zinimusprime gets the trophy. I’m kind of jealous.

@sammydog01 @tohar1 @zinimusprime fucking hell! i really need to work on my ability to do nothing

@carl669 @sammydog01 @tohar1 What’s the “trophy”??? I’ve never been more excited to be this mediocre!

@carl669 @sammydog01 @zinimusprime You’ll have to wait & see, I guess. Actually, I’ve modified the “trophy” I received last year after sucking with emphasis, and am looking forward to forwarding on to the un-lucky sucker, I mean hard-working combatant…I’m hoping it will be an ongoing thing which I NEVER see again.

@metaphore You’re both peaking at the right time, too bad you’re playing each other.

@sammydog01 My highest scoring week of the season and it literally has no impact at all. Win or lose it’s a rematch with @njfan next week.

@sammydog01 Tough letting him go as he’s a “hometown” kid (former NDSU Bison) but he went from playing on Sunday to out on Monday & I needed a few points (& I guess I chose wisely-with my guy getting me the win).

@tohar1 I understand, I hang on to players for sentimental reasons. I almost picked up Zeke, hope he doesn’t lose me the game. Good luck!

@sammydog01 SSHHHHH

@sammydog01 humbled two weeks in a row by @metaphore. Soon to be three.
/giphy embarrassing

@metaphore @njfan I made some poor decisions. See you next week in the loser round.

Dragontrainer just pointed out if I had played the tight end who keeps scoring touchdowns like I keep talking about putting in flex but never do I would have won. Thanks, sweetie.

@sammydog01 to be clear, since we are both in the playoffs, we are not in the running the toilet bowl trophy?

@njfan @zinimusprime already won the loser trophy. We’re double losers.

@njfan @sammydog01 I am they that is the loser.

@njfan @zinimusprime 170 points this week, way to go big at the wrong time.

@njfan She was predicted to get over 230 until Purdy decided he didn’t want to be MVP after all.

CONGRATS @METAPHORE AND @TOHAR1!

Dragontrainer is sad.

@metaphore @njfan @sammydog01 Just call me “Consistently Mediocre”…Just good enough to get the job done! (PS: I did not like my chances going into Monday…but my team didn’t let me
down! )

@sammydog01 I did not. I checked this morning and it said Amari was probably gonna play. I didn’t like any of my alternatives for him but meant to check that he was really playing before the game started. Oops.

@sammydog01 I’m not sure how but I did it! I want to thank @sammydog01 for the season long encouragement, @tohar1 for being even worse than me at picking a final line up and knocking dragontrainer out of the running so I didn’t have to face her the final week. Thanks to @njfan for running the whole thing, @carl669 for showing us we all try to hard, @zinimusprime for same.

@metaphore congratulations!!

@sammydog01 Win when it counts!
Actually, my goal for the whole season was to NOT finish in last place!!! So how do I get an address to mail the last place trophy to “Zinlandia Zinimehsprimes”?

@sammydog01 - thank you, I look forward to you resuming commissioner duties next year!

@njfan If we make changes to how things are scored now will they carry over to next year and we can be a little less harsh to kickers?

@metaphore excellent question. @sammydog01, as the commissioner, would scoring changes made now, remain in place for next year? We non-commissioners would like to know.

@njfan @sammydog01 I just assume, if the ESPN app allows, making changes now will be easier to remember than doing it 8 months from now.

@metaphore @njfan Now that I’m used to the new settings I like them and would have another existential crisis if we changed again. Last night I watched Nico Collins score over 20 points on one catch. How cool is that? I’m flexible on kicker deductions though.

Also thanks for ending the season at week 17. I kept forgetting to do that. We can figure out how to change the commissioner next year, just make sure to remind me.

@njfan @sammydog01 I agree about ending week 17, so many of my players are sitting this week I could never win. Some of the single play bonus points feel a little overkill but if other people like it’s fine. The kicker loss of points is the thing that bothers me the most, losing a lot more points for a missed field goal than a significantly easier extra point doesn’t seem fair.

@tohar1 Maybe @carl669 would take it? If not look on the bright side, maybe you’ll come in last next year.

@carl669 @sammydog01 I got a taste of living in winning territory, so no, I’m not going back to the haunted grounds of Loserville! Carl, it’s all yours buddy!! (Whisper me your address…)

@sammydog01 @tohar1 uhh… wasn’t someone else in last place? can’t remember who though.

@carl669 @sammydog01 Yes, Zinlandia Zinimehsprimes was #8, but they have abdicated the throne of shame by not claiming the prize, so SammyDog01 nominated you…

@sammydog01 @tohar1 soooo… a trophy to immortalize my utter lack of effort? I’m down. I’ll whisper my address