Meh, you missed your chance for not-mehness! Baby arms were great, but definitely need to be animated. And a sound track of marching with the Wicked Witch of the West’s guard song in the background. Ohhh-weee-ohhh!
@Oldude it was facetious but I get that some folks might not have the good sense to reserve gasoline for vehicles, lawn equipment, and drinking… So fair point.
The stakes are going to come in the same box making them around maybe 16" to 20" long. Makes maybe 3 sections per torch. Its going to look funny… And not likely stay straight very long… Meh!
I would love for someone to tell me otherwise, but I recently read that citronella, dispersed in the air (candles, torches, etc.) doesn’t do anything to repel mosquitoes, and is based on very old product marketing. Citronella oil in heavy concentrations may be effective, but you would have to apply it to the skin directly to be so.
Doesn’t mean these torches are attractive, but I’d be wary if you expect them to turn away mosquitoes with any real effectiveness.
@Stumpy91 Dunno. That article says that it’s registered as a pesticide, but only serves to mask odors insects find more attractive. Without this being directly on you (the oil) I don’t know how effective it is from a torch several feet/yards away.
Stainless? Oh, sure rub it in, that you’ve graduated from college dorm room milk crate living and can have really nice stuff without kids. So there a re a few stains here and there. It’s been used. It’s ‘lived-in.’ I have a good salary but I choose to spend the cash on durable stuff and garanimals and massive boxes of cheerios…and therapy.
Sure, stainless, just like I suppose your soul? What? I am not bitter…I love my life…I really do…I swear. Don’t judge me.
@redfenix3185 Do you think extra "arse"holes are a thing to joke about? Do you know that people who have extra arseholes are protected by Federal laws? You sit back with your one arsehole and make garden lantern jokes for those inflicted with two or more. Why don’t you just bring out the putt-putt golf jokes? Shame on you!!!
I hope you never know the pain and suffering people with Biarse syndrome go through. But maybe I do!
@RiotDemon, a lot of places just off the oceans don’t. The constant ocean breeze does the heavy lifting for that
One of the many reasons I love living here near San Diego. ♀️
Dammit, Meh! I set my alarm for 4pm EST, loaded the page at exactly 4pm EST, and the MF’ing things still sold out before my purchase could be processed (after two failed attempts due to the server being slammed). Argh!!!
@Tadlem43 Hmmm, I wouldn’t hold our breath but I’m sure they saw how popular they were and maybe they will feature some more summer stuff. BTW, if you are listening, I’m not talking shit meh-gods, you guys are great!
Specs
What’s in the Box?
2x Torch
1x Funnel
Pictures
Cylinder
Cone
Cylinder pole
Cone pole
Funnel included
Box
Price Comparison
$49.95 (for similar) at Amazon
Warranty
30 day Mediocre
Estimated Delivery
Monday, July 13th - Thursday, July 16th
Decent looking. So slow loading I swore a Fuku was upon us…
@Stallion I thought so too
only 1 server running apparently. If only they sold out to Amazon, they might have a few more servers.
@mydrivec But then, Amazon sold us out on the state tax charges. So meh is standing tall in its own meh way… just… not… very… quickly… Error 408…
@mydrivec nnnoooooooooooooo…don’t say that!
Took nearly forever to load the site. Thought Fuko.
Bic on a stick?
@norman8 It’s rare that I actually “laugh out loud” at the comments in here, but “Bic on a Stick” got a full fledged and audible chuckle.
This deal is fire.
@larrygrochal It is lit, too.
Pro: no batteries needed
Con: unwieldy size
I think I’ll pass on these flashlights.
@awk If only they were Bluetoothed.
I usually just burn a couple tires in the back yard to keep skeeters away. These may be easier to light!
A little googling tells me these might be made by the same company as the pressure cooker recently offered.
In for one pair, sceeters are bad out here in East TX living by the lake. touchy-fierce-gremlin
First the wave of tactical knives, now torches!??!
The people of the village are ready to kill the beast.
@paula312 Just need some pitchforks and we’re set!
/giphy mature-zestful-platypus
Meh, you missed your chance for not-mehness! Baby arms were great, but definitely need to be animated. And a sound track of marching with the Wicked Witch of the West’s guard song in the background. Ohhh-weee-ohhh!
Is there an app so I can light these remotely?
@eeterrific Just hire a homeless guy and kill him after he lights them. Repeat the process until the homeless problem is solved.
@warpedrotors Its working for the Mexican immigrant problem. Just ask ICE and CPB.
I have such a big, long Bic. No, that’s not a typo. It is 65 inches, not 6.5 inches. Wanna see my Bic? Some Bic pics?
@Mehsturbator
Will definitely come in handy against sleestak.
@norman8 Just throw Cha-Ka at them and run.
These torches need a little Torch Song.
For when you’re wasted and you can’t find your way home.
Burning desire to buy these --meh be not
Don’t look now. It’s so bright in the dreamlight.
x 2.5” (W)?? My Bic is wider than that.
The pyro in me and the suicidal mosquitos in our back yard say yes!
Will they work with gasoline, diesel? (Much cheaper per ounce.)
@RedOak NO !!! kerosene only alternative
@Oldude it was facetious but I get that some folks might not have the good sense to reserve gasoline for vehicles, lawn equipment, and drinking… So fair point.
The stakes are going to come in the same box making them around maybe 16" to 20" long. Makes maybe 3 sections per torch. Its going to look funny… And not likely stay straight very long… Meh!
@rustyh3
any trip reports on this? I’m buying if I can carry it around and wave it at people.
I got two sets, we have wind and a fire pit so this will get the four cardinal skeeter trajectories.
I would love for someone to tell me otherwise, but I recently read that citronella, dispersed in the air (candles, torches, etc.) doesn’t do anything to repel mosquitoes, and is based on very old product marketing. Citronella oil in heavy concentrations may be effective, but you would have to apply it to the skin directly to be so.
Doesn’t mean these torches are attractive, but I’d be wary if you expect them to turn away mosquitoes with any real effectiveness.
@ACraigL It seems like it works according to this. http://npic.orst.edu/factsheets/citronellagen.html
@Stumpy91 Dunno. That article says that it’s registered as a pesticide, but only serves to mask odors insects find more attractive. Without this being directly on you (the oil) I don’t know how effective it is from a torch several feet/yards away.
Here’s a reasonable do/don’t for mosquito repellent. I’ve tried just about everything over the years with little success. I’m going with a big box fan this year.
http://www.rodalesorganiclife.com/wellbeing/mosquito-repellents-actually-work-and-ones-dont
@ACraigL The box fan is a great one. It actually works. Funny thing it does not smell and if you aim it just right no one will know if you smell…
@ACraigL Burgess Fogger. Best thing since sliced bread. They’re available in 120 volt and propane (easier for big yards) versions.
We first learned of them when we had a cottage that was otherwise almost unusable after rainy weather.
As long as there isn’t a lot of rain to rinse off the fog, the benefits can last several weeks.
glaring-passing-company
How do the speakers in these sound? And can I change the flame color? Do they work with HomeKit?
@steelopus They are compatible with Alexa. I can’t vouch for HomeKit.
WTF…were there only 10 to sell. I’ve tried to get in on this deal for 4 hours and the site is dead! Now they are sold out.
@not2bforgotten there was 815. You have to be here at midnight or 8am sharp top try and buy the item sometimes.
Stainless? Oh, sure rub it in, that you’ve graduated from college dorm room milk crate living and can have really nice stuff without kids. So there a re a few stains here and there. It’s been used. It’s ‘lived-in.’ I have a good salary but I choose to spend the cash on durable stuff and garanimals and massive boxes of cheerios…and therapy.
Sure, stainless, just like I suppose your soul? What? I am not bitter…I love my life…I really do…I swear. Don’t judge me.
/giphy living-with-children
What the fuck is this anyway? who the fuck needs one? good luck to whoever the fuck bought it stick it in your extra arsehole.
@redfenix3185 I like how you’re comfortable saying fuck three times but draw the sensitivity line at saying ‘arse’.
@redfenix3185 you must live where there aren’t any mosquitos. Where is that? I’d love to know.
@redfenix3185 Do you think extra "arse"holes are a thing to joke about? Do you know that people who have extra arseholes are protected by Federal laws? You sit back with your one arsehole and make garden lantern jokes for those inflicted with two or more. Why don’t you just bring out the putt-putt golf jokes? Shame on you!!!
I hope you never know the pain and suffering people with Biarse syndrome go through. But maybe I do!
@RiotDemon, a lot of places just off the oceans don’t. The constant ocean breeze does the heavy lifting for that
♀️
One of the many reasons I love living here near San Diego.
@RiotDemon Nevada! It’s a wonderful bug-free place, if you can take the heat (and occasional scorpion in your house)
Meh management has figured out that the meh’terati likes to cut and burn things.
Sold out a 4 PM in .002 seconds. So Meh.
Dammit, Meh! I set my alarm for 4pm EST, loaded the page at exactly 4pm EST, and the MF’ing things still sold out before my purchase could be processed (after two failed attempts due to the server being slammed). Argh!!!
@tristin should of set your alarm for 3:58.
At least that insanely fast sellout cause me to save buying 6 and never using them.
yes! yes! got one!
fuq. what? I’m a day late?
why don’t you call anymore?
Goddamnit, I want these so bad but I’m so so late. Hopefully you guys took notice that we all need some FIRE to go with all of the knives.
@Dengue Ooh, fire and knives!
/giphy flaming knives
@Dengue Yea, I wanted to get this, too. Wonder if we can talk them into selling us a couple even though it’s expired?
@Tadlem43 Hmmm, I wouldn’t hold our breath but I’m sure they saw how popular they were and maybe they will feature some more summer stuff. BTW, if you are listening, I’m not talking shit meh-gods, you guys are great!
Hate to gloat but was able to purchase 2.