Dear Meh.com
78Dear MEH.com :
As you are aware, American Lighting, Inc. has implemented an Internet Minimum Advertised Price Policy (“IMAP Policy”) with respect to certain American Lighting products. American Lighting implemented its IMAP Policy because it was concerned that some dealers were using artificially low prices on American Lighting products to build traffic to the detriment of American Lighting’s entire distribution system. These low prices not only undercut dealer profit margins on American Lighting’s products; they also create negative quality images for consumers.
It appears that the price reflected on your website for 3-46 Foot LED Light Strips does not comply with American Lighting’s IMAP Policy. Specifically, the price advertised on the website ($3-$22) is greater than the designated minimum price listed on American Lighting IMAP Policy Pricing Sheet.
As a result of this violation, and pursuant to American Lighting’s IMAP Policy, American Lighting has unilaterally decided to cancel all open shipments and future orders of American Lighting’s 3-46 Foot LED Light Strips. American Lighting reserves the right to accept orders of 3-46 Foot LED Light Strips in the future, but again, American Lighting’s decision of when and whether to accept future orders will be a unilateral one.*
Thank you for your support of the American Lighting brand. All questions regarding this issue should be directed to me.
Sincerely,
Jake K.
Ecommerce Sales Specialist
IMAP Administrator
American Lighting, Inc.
- 62 comments, 107 replies
- Comment
On one hand Jake says pricing lights too low is bad. Then on the other hand he says we priced ours greater than the minimum they require. But then why send the note. I wish that confusion didn't exist so I could just throw this note away without thinking about it. Anyways, perhaps we priced the lights too high folks, sorry about that.
@snapster "Specifically, the price advertised on the website ($3-$22) is greater than the designated minimum price listed on American Lighting IMAP Policy Pricing Sheet." Really tickles me.
@connorbush he had one job!
@snapster The good news is, if you are ever in the need of a non-detail oriented Ecommerce Sales Specialist, you just saved yourself a few $100 placing an ad.
He will advertise himself as a "big picture thinker". Not worried about those small details, like being correct.
@snapster So, I'm betting these come back up for sale again soon, but even cheaper, to comply with American Lighting’s IMAP Policy, per Jake's email?
@snapster i think they didn't like how it was listed. The sale page wasn't entirely clear that there was multiple products being sold. It took a little extra bit of thinking to figure out there was more than one thing being sold.
@Kevin also, that selling an item at different prices goes against the Daily Deal idea. If you're selling one thing, it should only have one price.
@Kevin no, they didn't take enough time to care how it was listed - that was just cut and paste work. Also, you might be the sole vote for 10 different days of single length LED cables.
@snapster This kind of stuff is above my pay grade. (whew)
@snapster my business partner has been dealing with this issue with Johnson & Johnson with what they call UPP, UPP is Unilateral Pricing Policy. No one eyecare provider in the United States can sell certain Acuvue contact lens products for less than what they say. It's basically professional price fixing. I see what they are doing, I didn't realize that the LED string light market was such a demanding market that it needed to be controlled and monitored by a cartel honcho. Please watch your back. I suggest installing more security cameras at meh HQ and maybe even hiring a couple a security guards.
@somf69 and maybe some better lighting.
@snapster Ha haha..that was good!
The LED lighting market is just as fixed as the CFL that came before them, and the incandescent before that. The big boys have always had a fixed price point that no one is allowed to sell under. A 4 pack of 60 watt equivalent LED bulbs costs less than a buck to manufacture but can't be sold for less than say 24.99. It's like this with ALL big businesses. They come to a "gentlemen's" agreement and that's that. Google it and see what GE and it's big lighting friends have been doing. Also my guess is they are trying to work in some kind of planned obsolescence on LED bulbs. This is typical of how they operate. Incandescent bulbs could have been made that would last 50,000+ hours. They wanted NONE of that and capped it at some absurd 5000 hours level. Halogen lights are even worse. I hate these companies almost as much as big pharma, big insurance and the RIAA/MPAA. Greedy asshole center.
@MEHcus i happen to have david bowie's 'we could be heros' in my headphones at this moment, looks like the chimp knows the song
Post Jake's email so we all can direct our questions to him.
@hallmike
REDACTED@DONTPOSTTHIS.COM
Have a nice day!
@mehtherfucker post-edit note: I think a staff member took initiative to remove the actual email and sadly, that's probably the right call. Nothing against the guy or even totally the policy (there are pros and cons we've discussed before)
once again:
but all i did was call the toll free number in colorado and the ancient lady that answers the phone looked it up for me
Frame and hang this letter on the wall; a letter like this is better than any award.
Collect them from as many companies as you can!
@DaveInSoCal @hollboll and @galmaegi may have something to say about this....
@DaveInSoCal not quite sure this is wall of shame worthy...
@hollboll Then @galmaegi will have to be the tiebreaker!
Jake meant that:
So with that logic, he is correct?
If less is more and more is the same as greater then greater is less.
Then:
"Specifically, the price advertised on the website ($3-$22) is LESS than the designated minimum price listed on American Lighting IMAP Policy Pricing Sheet."
Makes sense :-)
@connorbush my head hurts
@connorbush hooray for the spaceship operator!
@connorbush My brain can't make this make sense...
This would never happen with Jake from State Farm:
I would bet that Jake from America Lighting does not even wear khakis.
@connorbush I just gut-laughed at work. My cubemate stood up and had a "WTF?" expression on his face.
@hems79 my work here is finished.
@connorbush Excellent!
@connorbush lmao!
@connorbush could not have been more on point!
For me, it is their (lead containing / wash your hands after use / cancer causing / works for a week then dies) shit product creating "negative quality images for consumers" - IMHO the price point here at Meh was all they had going for it (as a positive).
@MrsPavlov But doesn't nearly every product sold into California come with that warning? (paging @narfcake in case I got that wrong)
@dashcloud Nope. Only stuff with potentially harmful shit, like the dinner plates at the 98-cents store that may contain lead. Or the carcinogenic modifiers in plastic stuff.
@dashcloud everything in the state of california is known to the state of california to cause cancer.
@vampje Actually, laws of cancer (kinda' like the laws of physics) are much different once you step into the state. You're much more susceptible to cancer while you're within its borders
I don't know what this picture has to do with my lie... err... statement, but I like it and wanted to post it anyway
@capguncowboy
@vampje I keep watching this over and over, hoping I eventually get to see the end result and that it involves blood and compound fractures.
@vampje Damn that kid is dumb.
@galmaegi Does that mean you'd like us to cancel more orders?
I'm assuming you guys have a shell company you can use to place another order and blow them out even cheaper next time.
Take that, Jake. You fucking IMAP fucker.
More of these so we can start our own MAP (Manufacturers Are Perplexing) program.
@Barney I could not agree with you more.
I see the easiest solution is to add the word "may or may not be" when describing the manufacturer and models.
@narfcake plus then we can send you whatever we want! every day fukubukuro :)
@snapster I have no objections to that.
@snapster I would feel more comfortable if your business model allowed you send me whatever I wanted, despite what I ordered.
@snapster Yes! EMP: Especially Mediocre Person program, where you send subscribers whatever you want.
@hollboll - is this the "customer service emails regarding these shit lights are about to end" happy dance??
Since when did Meh start advertising ?
@ceagee And what's this Internet thing?!
@narfcake Internet is the thing I invented with Al Gore.
OK, it's been a while since grade school but I think I've got this math down:
$3-$22 = -$19
They are saying that vendors are supposed to list it for less than -$19? Did they send over a list of vendors who comply with this policy? If they have a vendor who will send me $20 along with the item, that would be great.
This MAP policy is a HUGE benefit for consumers - thats lunch money right there!
@MrGlass aha - does this resolve the "Greater than the Minimum" wording if he was speaking in distance from zero? hmm. nope that doesn't work.
I knew I was over paying for these!
I am unaware. I'm still unaware. What's going on?
@Lotsofgoats damn goat ate all the LED rope lights.
Blame @Lotsofgoats!
also I wonder whether they thought they had come up with a fresh and original acronym in IMAP
@Lotsofgoats Insubordinate Meh.com Abhors Profits.
@Lotsofgoats "let me just check my email and see if 'imap' is taken. Nope looks like we are good, let's go with imap"
MAP = artificially inflating prices to protect wholesales and retailers stuck in the past.
@ThatsHeadly iMAP = Apple's practice of artificially inflating prices to protect their own profit margins.
@ruouttaurmind hmm.. and I thought it was just their map app.
And the chickens have come home to roost. @snapster has played this ecommerce game too fast and loose for too long. Fun while it lasted.
@medz according to the email, not fast and loose ENOUGH!
@medz we got too cocky
@Lotsofgoats or not cocky enough!
@medz What I'm hearing is that my chickens get a refund for roosting under some overpriced American Lighting LED rope lights.
@metageist That's just fucking awesome.
@MrsPavlov You mean clucking.
@metageist Put a dimmer on those lights. Mood lighting = more eggs.
The incurable flickering that started after a week actually did that for me.
😑
ALL open shipments and orders? So they aren't going to sell them anywhere at all, ever again, because of Meh?
I was just working on a Dovecot IMAP server, but I think that's a little different.
@awk That was bothering me, too. It's like reading psychiatrists' essays recommending CBT. It all depends on what headspace you're reading the acronym in...
i still don't get what the issue is?
did they just not realize that the range of prices was for different lengths?
did we pay too much or not enough?
@username too much it seems :)
Bury 'em with the leaky batteries. The American Lighting rope LEDs were crappy products, I'm glad to see them out of the Meh lineup.
I love letters like this. Once again, I hate letters like this.
That makes my head hurt. I read it several times trying to find sense before continuing on down the thread. If you use big words everyone will know how smart and important you are, right?
@speediedelivery Youareabsolutelyright.
@speediedelivery Indubitably.
@speediedelivery I love utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence!
@snapster You should reply to the person and tell them "We couldn't figure out what you meant, so we asked our customers if they could".
I honestly can't see what the point of the letter is. So you sold it for less than they think you should? The reasoning for the email is just stupid. A low price on a quality product isn't going to turn anyone away. A low price on a shitty product will still get people to bite. A high price on a shitty product will turn everyone away.
Good luck with your business model, American Lighting (which is likely made in China).
@capguncowboy sorta reads like it was translated doesn't it :)
@thismyusername Please, somebody, run it English-to-Chinese, then reverse it and post the results. It's like bad lip reading for corporate communications.
@thismyusername The company is based out of Denver, but most of their products are made in China. I don't mind buying products made in China, but I dislike, very much, companies that disguise their Chinese products with a misleading company name.
@capguncowboy Colorado, huh? Dope. That explains it.
@capguncowboy Like Apple products "Designed in California" in large letters but in small letters, "Made in China."
I ran the letter through a Google translator to Chinese. Then I translated it back to English. It makes just as much sense as it did before, but at least now it has an excuse
As we all know, the US lighting company has implemented Internet advertising lowest price policy ( "IMAP Policy") in respect of certain US lighting products. American Lighting IMAP implementation policy, because it is concerned that some dealers use in the US lighting products artificially low prices in order to build traffic to the entire distribution system in the United States lighting damage. These inexpensive lighting products not only weaken the United States dealer's profit margin; they also create a negative image quality for consumers.
It seems, the price reflected in your website 3-46 feet LED lights do not meet the IMAP policy of the US lighting. Specifically, the cost than the specified minimum price listed in the American Lighting IMAP policy pricing table sites advertised price ($ 3- $ 22).
Since the results of the US lighting IMAP violation of this policy, as well as the United States unilaterally decided to cancel all open illumination shipments of 3-46 feet and the American Lighting LED light bar future orders. American Lighting reserved the right to accept the next 3-46 feet LED light bar orders, but again, when US lighting company and whether to accept future orders decision will be unilateral. *
Thanks for your support of the American Lighting brand. All questions about this issue should be directed to me.
Sincerely,
Jack K.
E-commerce sales specialist
IMAP Administrator
American Lighting
@capguncowboy That is pure poetry. Thanks!
@capguncowboy so good. 😂
"United States unilaterally decided to cancel all open illumination shipments" haha
In one of my Fuku I got a Ollie by Sphero, I put it for sale on online and the Sphero people sent me a similar message but I just deleted it.
@gnext2 Seriously? That's beyond idiotic for them to do that. You can only enforce MAP with CONTRACTED dealers or distributors. What the hell are they going to threaten some random guy on the Internet with? Taking you off their Christmas card list?
On the up side it only took google 43 min to index this thread (out of idle curiosity I was looking to see if the email address was still there). Google must like you even if Jake the snaKe does not.
From the cached page on google:
"snapster shared a link 43 minutes ago"
@Kidsandliz to be fair it might have just gotten the servers to respond from last night at that point :)
The term "unilateral" makes me think of nuclear arms agreements. It seems a tad bit overkill to apply it to LED lighting strip pricing complaints.
Wait a second... let me take that letter into our home theater... and then into our garage to shed some American Lighting on it.
@RedOak Nope, that didn't help.
F*k MAP pricing and F*k the Police!!! Inflating a crappy products price and keeping it there is the name of their game. I'd say the exact opposite to what Meh stands for. Stand strong Meh, @snapster, ban THEIR junk product from ever being sold here on MEH and let them know who is the boss around here!
@Stallion YEAH! F*K THE CORPORATION
@Stallion STAND UP TO THE MAN
@Stallion Start an Internet petition!
So @snapster can we put together a list of questions to direct to Jake ? That might be fun !
@ceagee then we'll lynch him for not properly checking the listing
Oh boy, look, stupidity
Jake from state farm
I'm thinking we're all looking at this wrong. It seems Meh.com is in violation of something serious and as the CEO, @snapster could be in a world of shit. So let's concentrate on getting him out of this hell Jake is determined to rain down on him for advertising a greater than the designated minimum price listed on American Lighting IMAP Policy Pricing Sheet. [BTW: I for one would love to see this sheet]
I, in unwavering support of Meh and @snapster, will hereby accept a refund for all the snake lights purchased from Meh.com in order to bring the price in line with American Lighting, Inc.'s Internet Minimum Advertised Price Policy aka; (ALIIMAPP).
And I bought quite a few of these too. Cha-ching!
You can always Contact Jake yourself
@RedHot However it is unlikely that Jake will see anything from us there, likely he is a low level, pencil pushing bureaucrat. It is his email some want to blow up, not customer service's - that group is just innocent bystanders.
@Kidsandliz That's not fair either! Jake was just doing what his boss told him to do. I didn't mean the customer service email btw, I meant the one for the sales department who work with retailers (like Meh).
@RedHot I misunderstood... although originally I was under the impression that some people wanted to email him specifically
I just figured it out. 'Greater than' means 'better than', which means 'lower than', which means - wait, I need coffee.
@OldCatLady it was a great price!
The recurring use of 'unilateral' made me think of this sketch from Kids in the Hall. I must have seen it 20 years ago and still reference it from time to time.
@ACraigL Could you not ascertain that unilateral was completely absent from that bit? Sheesh. Do you lack command of the English language? Not copacetic, dude.
can we try to write a response that has as many IMAPs stuffed into it as possible?
To whom it may actually pertain,
We regret to hear that the IMAP policy is managing artificial price points. It might amuse producers to install mandatory, arbitrary policies to boost revenue, but it mightn't actively please consumers.
ok i ran out of gas (ugh and I broke mehdown again)
@Lotsofgoats Great start!
let us consult the mehcronomicon.
"He who fails to realize greater than be not the same as less than, fails at life and shall be subject to an Irk Revenue Service audit. So say we all."
@carl669 So sayeth the hole-y scripture, being scribed as our assembly progress. AAAAAHHHMMmen
@RedHot
@carl669 what time does the necro romcom start again?
@Lotsofgoats 3:33 Pacific.
@carl669 Damn, why can't it be at 4:20?
@jaremelz because we need time to procure the necessary pork rinds and french onion dip before the hour of 4:20 is upon us.
@carl669 Carl as apparently the official voice of the mehcronomicon, are you, like, carving all these pronouncements you, oops mehcronomicon, makes in some stone tablets or something as equally authentically aged?
@Kidsandliz i really should start writing all these down. who knows. maybe in a thousand years, some alien overlord will find them, think "wtf? these people are crazy!", and leave the planet instead of invading it.
I could save the world!!
@OldCatLady
RE: English-Chinese-English translation
Dear MEH.COM:
as you know, the United States and lighting, the Company has implemented a internet advertising the minimum price policy (the "policy") in the IMAP certain American lighting products. The United States and the implementation of its policy of lighting IMAP because it was concerned that some dealer use artificially low prices on American Lighting products to build traffic, harm the United States throughout the distribution system of lighting. These low prices not only weaken the reseller's profits and lighting products; they had also caused negative image quality of consumers.
It seems that the prices reflect on your web site in the foot of the proceedings . . LED light bar does not conform with the lighting of the IMAP policy. Specific price posted on the web site (3 million won) is greater than the specified -22 Minimum Price List in the United States policy of lighting price list to IMAP
As a result of such violations, and in accordance with the American lighting IMAP policy, the United States has unilaterally lighting decided to cancel all open shipments and future orders, the lighting of the proceedings . . pin LEDS light bar. The United States has the right to accept orders lighting of the foot of the proceedings . . LED strips in the future, but the United States and lighting to determine when and whether or not to accept the future orders will be a unilateral. *
Thank you for your support, the United States and the illumination of the brand. All of the questions on this issue should be directed to me.
Sincere,
Jake
e-Commerce Sales Specialist
IMAP Administrator
American lighting ,inc
Maybe a few more times through the sausage grinder would improve it. Bonus points if anybody can get it to words of three letters, so Irk can sing it to the tune of 'You Can't Do That'.
@OldCatLady I thought the three letters was a fun idea so I gave it a go. I don't think Irk is going to be singing it, but maybe he can put on a nice corporate suit and scold Meh.
Dear Meh.com (MAD APE DEN)
Yo Meh,
As you saw, USA Lit Inc has a Web Min Buy aim ("WMB Aim"). We use the WMB Aim cuz a low buy for you is a bad pay job for us. And any Joe can see our LED is a toy.
I saw the box of our Sun-Ray LED Rod on the Meh web, and it was no joy. No WMB Aim met.
F you, Meh. You nix the WMB Aim, and now no new Sun-Ray LED Rod can go to you. Ha ha! We may fly a new box to you in a bit tho. Or not.
But hey it's so rad you buy USA Lit. All Q's on it go to me, ok?
Bye,
J.K.
Web Buy Guy
WMB Man
USA Lit Inc
OK, I translated it to Chinese then to Zulu then to English. Now we're getting closer to where we want to be.
MEH.COM Dear:
As you know, under the lights and the United States, the company has a policy of advertising online lowest price of IMAP American Lighting products (hereinafter referred to as the "Policy"). The implementation of the United States and its policies lighting IMAP, because it is concerned that some of the dealers in the United States the use of lighting products artificially low prices to build traffic, lighting damage to the distribution system throughout the United States. These low prices, not only weakened benefits dealers and products for the light; they contributed to the negative image quality for consumers.
Report, as reflected in the price action the foot of your site. . LED strip lighting IMAP does not comply with the policy. Specific prices published on the website (3 million won) than lighting the price list, more IMAP US policy lowest price -22
As a result of such violations, and in accordance with American policy Lighting IMAP, United States unilaterally decided to cancel the runway lighting and order goods, lighting up the case in the future. . Pin LED light bar. The United States has the right to order convicted of foot lamps. . In the future, LED strip light, but the United States and the lamps, to determine when and if to accept future orders will be one-sided. *
Thank you for your support, the United States and brand lamps. All questions about this should be directed to me.
sincere,
Jack
E-commerce sales specialist
IMAP Administrator
Lighting American, INC.
@RedHot Oh wow, that has real potential. 'Convicted of foot lamps' and 'pin LED light bar' sound mildly salacious, though I love 'MEH.COM Dear'!
@OldCatLady and "lighting damage to the distribution system throughout the United States" sounds pretty serious.
@OldCatLady and "As a result of such violations, and in accordance with American policy Lighting IMAP, United States unilaterally decided to cancel the runway lighting and order goods, lighting up the case in the future."
In bed.
@RedHot Aha! South Korea has entered the fray! '3 million won' is equivalent to USD $2,520.00 which takes this into another monetary category entirely. (In bed?)
Ran @capguncowboy's translation through Bad Translator. Had to do it one sentence at a time. I used TransPerfect translator, number of translations: 5.
As we still know, United States that you/they commercially have easily pi pi internet the publicit served politics of the price (statesman IMAP) in the respect as some United States that the anznden, in gi, the constituted one tchtig, produced. Ausstellung-IMAP-amricaine the political realization, perch him / / it included, l of the Hndler in him to the use of United States, that anzndens of knstliche of the products low lease in sequence to Verhltnis of the structures to the systme of the whole distribution, the show-pain us for him / it. These products of the lighting the good flchissent of March not only the tats-vereinigtes damage a shake a profit of the edge of the Hndlers; You / them the dveloppent also a qualit of the fr of ngative of Portrt the consumers.
Him / it happens / it, the price has reflt in Your site web from when amricaines manufactured 3-46 Fe of GUIDS I void any rencontrs to the IMAP-Politik of the exposure. Spcifiquement, the bed of the child of this the price, that Mindest-spcifis he/she wrote in the fair of amricaine, since the IMAP-Politik that glorifies places of the table price of donn of the opinion it has ($3-$22). Since the rsultats of the verstt of amricaine of exposure IMAP of this politics, uniforms, unilatral has hires of dcid of the illumination that it becomes from 3-46 Fens geffnet to annul and the exposure has amricaine, still PROVOQU Blcke-Hlle instructions of knftige. Discut had the exposure of amricaine the solo to suppose 3-46 following Fe toward PROVOQU-Anweisungen of the rod of the Hlle Lei, but again, if the exposure motion I activate the United States and or, to suppose the dcision of knftigen of the orders, sar unilatraux.*
It thanks Your dafr it bears the stain of the amricaine of exposure You. Even if the doubts of this question, dirigs of Ich-mme are.
SINCREMENT,
VALET K.
And-tauschen You, the Spcialistes imap sells the administrator to explanation of the american
@hollboll careful. if you say this with the right cadence, the Candyman appears.
@carl669 Maybe he could explain the content of the original letter for us
@hollboll It's the same people who caption Bad Lip Reading, I tell you! Moo!! Now I'm crying!
Does Chick-fil-A use American Lighting?
I sold some of mine on ebay for less than I paid once one of them stopped working. Should I expect anot email? Haha.
So long story short, will I be able to spend more money on here for rope lights or did they pull the plug?
@joe43wv yea, I got some in the fuku and I want to buy more. Now what
IMAP.... I Love Acronyms!!!!!
@somf69 Think that stands for I'm A Prick?
@mehbee
Internet
Must
Amplify
Pricing
So, another daily deal site had these up yesterday (still for sale) but didn't mention the brand name.
http://www.thatdailydeal.com/home.php?id=42965&past_deal=1
I wonder if they too will get a friendly letter saying they sold them over the minimum...This whole thing has me laughing, maybe more than it should.
@jaybird I just now saw this topic and that was my first thought! Laugh away I find it, and the responses to it, hysterical.
Dear American Lighting,
IMAP? Really? Don't you realize we own everything that begins with an i?
Please cease and desist the usage of IMAP immediately.
Love
Apple
SO wait, If I sell my lights on ebay for $1.00 will I get a email from this goon?
Since they unilaterally made that decision, it seems they have no leverage on advertised pricing for any stock that's already in the best little warehouse in Texas.
@snapster, I truly miss you and the rest of the team you have harvested. Love what you have done with warehouse as well. T. Miller (tomdoe)
If American Lighting's emails didn't have a confidentiality note in the signature before, they soon will!
@mehdaf LOL
I didn't buy any so thank goodness I don't have THIS hanging over my head. (or anywhere else)
In defense of Jake, he did use spell check before he sent the message.
Say it to my face Jake!
@snapster Can we get an update on this? Did you send them a response letter (or a link to this thread?) Did they send you a follow-up letter since you've sold them several times since?
@dashcloud I think the threat from Jake was to not sell any more lights to Meh, and since Meh can't dump the ones they already bought it's not an issue.
@dashcloud I think it'd be nice for an update as well. But it hasn't really been that long either.
And?
I am new to this site but please bring high end automatic espresso machines on in some form as coffee is the fuel that keeps going.