“Hey, miss. So I’m trying to be civilized here, but this facility’s design conflicts with the location of the, erm, ‘equipment’. Think you could maybe give me a hand? Actually, it’ll probably take two hands.”
@Barney@Ignorant@RiotDemon
I’m actually a Texas resident and have been going on three decades. Also, turns out my natural father is Tex-Mex. But I still don’t consider myself a Texan (if we could turn it blue or at least purple, I might maybe think about it).
Anyway, “West Florida” (which I’d guess isn’t new, but I don’t recall it) and “Florida rejects” are two of the funniest things I’ve heard all week. I shall have to use them on the proud natives; I’ll probably start with my Aggie friends.
@2many2no@Ignorant@joelmw@RiotDemon
Going through my mother’s papers, after her death, I discovered a deep dark secret that my family never wanted me to know. My grandmother, my mother’s mother, was born in Texas. That makes me 1/4 Texan.
For many weeks after reading this, I was in shock. I felt like I was wearing a scarlet letter “A”, or maybe it should be a “T”. But I have been able to, especially after some self medication with vast quantities of alcohol, deal with it.
“Centaur impersonator Liam Pheres of Rock Falls takes a break from the Winnix County chapter’s “Mythology Throwdown” as local resident Janelle Buck walks on in disbelief.”
Uhmmmmm… That’s not how centaur anatomy works.
@RiotDemon
It appears as though he may be an impostor.
“Piss like a racehorse” is just a figure of speech!
This is much easier than when the guy in back had to poo.
I feel sorry for all the centaurs out here that didn’t spring for the costume with the fly.
Inspired by @RiotDemon’s observation:
“Hey, miss. So I’m trying to be civilized here, but this facility’s design conflicts with the location of the, erm, ‘equipment’. Think you could maybe give me a hand? Actually, it’ll probably take two hands.”
“I thought it was bigger on the inside”
Wtf
People are always making fun of Florida man. This is Texas.
@RiotDemon Texas is just West Florida.
@Ignorant @RiotDemon Texas residents are Florida rejects.
@Barney @Ignorant @RiotDemon That’s because anyone clear-headed enough to leave Florida knows better than to go to Kansas.
@2many2no @Ignorant @RiotDemon
@Barney @Ignorant @RiotDemon
I’m actually a Texas resident and have been going on three decades. Also, turns out my natural father is Tex-Mex. But I still don’t consider myself a Texan (if we could turn it blue or at least purple, I might maybe think about it).
Anyway, “West Florida” (which I’d guess isn’t new, but I don’t recall it) and “Florida rejects” are two of the funniest things I’ve heard all week. I shall have to use them on the proud natives; I’ll probably start with my Aggie friends.
@2many2no @Barney @Ignorant @RiotDemon
Also, did you hear? Especially lately, the US is the world’s Florida?
Earth is the solar system’s Florida.
@2many2no @Ignorant @joelmw @RiotDemon
Going through my mother’s papers, after her death, I discovered a deep dark secret that my family never wanted me to know. My grandmother, my mother’s mother, was born in Texas. That makes me 1/4 Texan.
For many weeks after reading this, I was in shock. I felt like I was wearing a scarlet letter “A”, or maybe it should be a “T”. But I have been able to, especially after some self medication with vast quantities of alcohol, deal with it.
Except for the nightmares.
@2many2no @Barney @joelmw @RiotDemon
@Ignorant Thank you.
“Centaur impersonator Liam Pheres of Rock Falls takes a break from the Winnix County chapter’s “Mythology Throwdown” as local resident Janelle Buck walks on in disbelief.”
I gotta see a man about a horse
I gotta pee in a can because I’m not a horse
The 37th Doctor Who enters his newly redesigned Tardis.
(I have no idea what the hell I’m talking about. I watched a few episodes in the early 80s…)
Identifies as a human male.
“If you are wondering who is holding onto it while I pee, it’s the guy in the back of the suit who has his face stuffed in my ass.”
@mfladd Is his name “Russ T. Trommbohn”?
That horse was going way too fast when he ran into that dude…
“Man, it’s dark up in here!” said the horse.
@2many2no My bet!
Oh Willburrrrr how long have you and Ed been hiding this.
Man in costume using a portable toilet.
Look, ma! No hooves!
Didja notice his head don’t even fit in the head? It’s still outside.
@lseeber I DID notice that! I thought that was the whole gag, but then I noticed the horse butt.
@medz lol
You have to really like someone to agree to walk around bent over with your face in their butt in public.
Just in case you wanted to see the front:
FYI, there’s no one in the butt.
@RiotDemon Not at the moment, but we’re totally cool with what he does on his own time.
@RiotDemon What if we didn’t?
@blaineg too late.
Centaur overload.
https://imgur.com/gallery/fkitiiK
centaur wiz(ard)…