I was thinking how those straps would be uncomfortable and how easily they would break . . . And the. I saw the weight of the totes. My shoulders say “pass.”
That was a heckuva weird writeup. To save anyone else the trouble: There is no Nun Better, nor any Ian T. Gould. The “payoff”, such as it is, is an anemic reference to Austin Powers, which was written by Mike Meyers.
Plus, a clumsy typo at the end to really put a stomp on the ol’ clomper.
Anyway! Without further ado – and I say this with much love for the Meh copywriter(s) – I nominate this as the Worst Write-up in Meh History! Am I wrong? Prove me wrong!!
What can you say, when a man asks you to dance with him? I most certainly will not dance with you, I’ll see you in hell first. Why, thank you, I’d like to awfully, but I’m having labor pains. Oh, yes, do let’s dance together – it’s so nice to meet a man who isn’t a scaredy-cat about catching my beri-beri. No. There was nothing for me to do, but say I’d adore to.
I’m so glad I brought it to his attention that this is a waltz they’re playing. Heaven knows what might have happened, if he had thought it was something fast; we’d have blown the sides right out of the building, Why does he always want to be somewhere that he isn’t? Why can’t we stay in one place just long enough to get acclimated? It’s this constant rush, rush, rush, that’s the curse of American life. That’s the reason that we’re all of us so – Ow! For God’s sake, don’t kick, you idiot; this is only second down. Oh, my shin. My poor, poor shin, that I’ve had ever since I was a little girl!
You see, that little step of yours – well, it’s perfectly lovely, but it’s just a tiny bit tricky to follow at first. Oh, did you work it up yourself? You really did? Well, aren’t you amazing! Oh, now I think I’ve got it. Oh, I think it’s lovely. I was watching you do it when you were dancing before. It’s awfully effective when you look at it.
It’s awfully effective when you look at it. I bet I’m awfully effective when you look at me. My hair is hanging along my cheeks, my skirt is swaddling about me, I can feel the cold damp of my brow. I must look like something out of the “Fall of the House of Usher.” This sort of thing takes a fearful toll of a woman my age. And he worked up his little step himself, he with his degenerate cunning. And it was just a tiny bit tricky at first, but now I think I’ve got it. Two stumbles, slip, and a twentyyard dash; yes. I’ve got it. I’ve got several other things, too, including a split shin and a bitter heart. I hate this creature I’m chained to. I hated him the moment I saw his leering, bestial face. And here I’ve been locked in his noxious embrace for the thirty-five years this waltz has lasted. Is that orchestra never going to stop playing? Or must this obscene travesty of a dance go on until hell burns out?
@UncleVinny maybe no sitcom but a group of retired religious sisters in Upstate New York run a boutique chocolate shop under that name. Having been educated by that order i can tell you thats about as good as their sense of humor gets.
@DHCicero It cannot. They are using the wrong units of measurement.
These were recently redesigned to use more recycled plastics to combat pollution in the ocean. They really needed to get some of that plastic waste processed, so the bags each actually weigh in at 21.8 tons.
Oh yeah, those are metric tons.
Do your part to keep the oceans free of plastic. Order today!
@DHCicero@djslack@tinamarie1974 if you takethe printed weight as ounces, it sort of works. Tote = 1.3625 lbs, Pouch = 0.4 lbs.
Someone didn’t know the diff between oz and lb.
/giphy poor education
@stolicat there you go doing actual math and getting the right answers again!
If I had to guess, the conversion was done from grams at the manufacturer by someone who legitimately doesn’t know what a pound is. We might as well weigh things in whoozlies; it would make as much sense.
Specs
What’s in the Box?
Price Comparison
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Monday, July 13th - Thursday, July 16th
/giphy woot
@stinks
/giphy meant ironically
21.8 lbs??? WTAF?
@smkarizona That’s pretty light FOR AN ENTIRE MAINSAIL!!1!!
@smkarizona Stealth IRK?
According to the stats, these bags are heavy AF. C. Wonder if they are lined with lead?
It’ll be a C. Wonder if these things actually sell
21+ pounds? What are these made out of…lead? I cannot IMAGINE lugging a 21 pound bag around! And 6+ pounds for a pouch? That cannot be right…can it?
Price Comparison
¯_(ツ)_/¯
was $49
hey- those’ll match the colored handled knife set I got last year!!! My clown costume is complete!
why would someone name a company “C. Wonder”
Hmm… might to add a word.
@cinoclav that’s how some people talk in them parts.
“Might to go down to the auto shop …”
@stolicat They might to go back to school.
I was thinking how those straps would be uncomfortable and how easily they would break . . . And the. I saw the weight of the totes. My shoulders say “pass.”
I guess Meh thought this product was tote-ally awesome and they had this deal in the bag.
POPSOCKETS! SPROCKETS! DAVY CROCKETT! AWESOME!
I really couldn’t handle these bags at 21.8 lbs for the tote and 6+ lbs for the pouch!
I Wonder, Wonder who, who-oo-ooh,
Who made the Bag and Tote.
Tell me, tell me, tell me
Oh, who made the Bag and Tote
So, when you use the tote to carry your weight set around, you can just leave one of the 20 lb weights behind and never miss it?
That was a heckuva weird writeup. To save anyone else the trouble: There is no Nun Better, nor any Ian T. Gould. The “payoff”, such as it is, is an anemic reference to Austin Powers, which was written by Mike Meyers.
Plus, a clumsy typo at the end to really put a stomp on the ol’ clomper.
Visions of Dorothy Parker’s The Waltz in its ungainliness: https://dickatlee.com/poetry/pdfs/waltz_dorothy_parker.pdf
Anyway! Without further ado – and I say this with much love for the Meh copywriter(s) – I nominate this as the Worst Write-up in Meh History! Am I wrong? Prove me wrong!!
What can you say, when a man asks you to dance with him? I most certainly will not dance with you, I’ll see you in hell first. Why, thank you, I’d like to awfully, but I’m having labor pains. Oh, yes, do let’s dance together – it’s so nice to meet a man who isn’t a scaredy-cat about catching my beri-beri. No. There was nothing for me to do, but say I’d adore to.
I’m so glad I brought it to his attention that this is a waltz they’re playing. Heaven knows what might have happened, if he had thought it was something fast; we’d have blown the sides right out of the building, Why does he always want to be somewhere that he isn’t? Why can’t we stay in one place just long enough to get acclimated? It’s this constant rush, rush, rush, that’s the curse of American life. That’s the reason that we’re all of us so – Ow! For God’s sake, don’t kick, you idiot; this is only second down. Oh, my shin. My poor, poor shin, that I’ve had ever since I was a little girl!
You see, that little step of yours – well, it’s perfectly lovely, but it’s just a tiny bit tricky to follow at first. Oh, did you work it up yourself? You really did? Well, aren’t you amazing! Oh, now I think I’ve got it. Oh, I think it’s lovely. I was watching you do it when you were dancing before. It’s awfully effective when you look at it.
It’s awfully effective when you look at it. I bet I’m awfully effective when you look at me. My hair is hanging along my cheeks, my skirt is swaddling about me, I can feel the cold damp of my brow. I must look like something out of the “Fall of the House of Usher.” This sort of thing takes a fearful toll of a woman my age. And he worked up his little step himself, he with his degenerate cunning. And it was just a tiny bit tricky at first, but now I think I’ve got it. Two stumbles, slip, and a twentyyard dash; yes. I’ve got it. I’ve got several other things, too, including a split shin and a bitter heart. I hate this creature I’m chained to. I hated him the moment I saw his leering, bestial face. And here I’ve been locked in his noxious embrace for the thirty-five years this waltz has lasted. Is that orchestra never going to stop playing? Or must this obscene travesty of a dance go on until hell burns out?
@UncleVinny maybe no sitcom but a group of retired religious sisters in Upstate New York run a boutique chocolate shop under that name. Having been educated by that order i can tell you thats about as good as their sense of humor gets.
I honestly thought the 21 pounds was a typo but then I found the same bag on two other sites and wowza, it’s real.
As they (apparently) used to say in the ‘60s… “Heavy, man.”
The tote: aka a “baguette”.
/youtube Wonderboy
Don’t blame the editor of product specs. That poor soul weighed the bags using new math.
/giphy heavy tote
/giphy really heavy tote
/giphy really really really heavy tote
/giphy totes heavy
I will take the barque and skip the bag.
@CaptAmehrican Leave the gun, take the cannoli.
Ok, all kidding aside, are these things 21 pounds?! That simply cannot be correct… right?
@DHCicero It cannot. They are using the wrong units of measurement.
These were recently redesigned to use more recycled plastics to combat pollution in the ocean. They really needed to get some of that plastic waste processed, so the bags each actually weigh in at 21.8 tons.
Oh yeah, those are metric tons.
Do your part to keep the oceans free of plastic. Order today!
@DHCicero @djslack
@DHCicero @djslack @tinamarie1974 if you takethe printed weight as ounces, it sort of works. Tote = 1.3625 lbs, Pouch = 0.4 lbs.
Someone didn’t know the diff between oz and lb.
/giphy poor education
@stolicat there you go doing actual math and getting the right answers again!
If I had to guess, the conversion was done from grams at the manufacturer by someone who legitimately doesn’t know what a pound is. We might as well weigh things in whoozlies; it would make as much sense.
He ain’t heavy, he’s my tote…
Totes McGoats.
@blaineg
