@mediocrebot um- gimme a few- i need at least 7 more drinks before this deal looks good.

Perfect Pancake on Amazon is $7.77 http://www.amazon.com/Perfect-Pancake-Pan-As-Seen/dp/B00AZW4WU2 $9.99 at Bed Bath and Beyond http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/product/perfect-pancake-pan/1041214916 and $19.99 for 2 from the official As Seen on TV site http://www.asseenontv.com/perfect-pancake-pan-buy-1-get-1-free/detail.php?p=527672

OMG hilarious, had to share the laugh with a few friends, but I don't think anyone will buy it. Nice try.

@rileyper you need to be awake at 4am

@rileyper You had to watch those obscure channels, and yes, late very late.

@Outofmymind and LOL@ the phone number.

@bottleknight make a good waffle batter, cook it up in the perfect pancake. buy a whole frier chicken. butcher it down, saving the organs. brine the chicken (salt/sugar water). assemble your wet/dry fry station. don't just use flour. season it really well. i like paprika in my fried chicken batter. fry it up. serve on the waffles with butter and maple syrup. Nap.

@bottleknight use a blender to turn the chicken and can of broth into a poor able substance. Add seasoning and then fritter it.

@kylewood I'm scared of your cooking

@bottleknight My wife is too.

@kylewood One time I made fish soup in the blender using frozen fish sticks... It actually wasn't too bad, just kinda weird.

@ChadP mix the syrup with franks hot sauce and you've got the best 4 am snack to watch these infomercials

@kylewood I really love imagining this concoction as a poor, able substance

@yugrudfoo Yahhh!

@somf69 I'd love to see their reaction when they open the knife package in the office. :-D

@alpine I'm hiding that in my desk drawer

@somf69 I was so MEH on this deal... until now.

@PurplePawprints Oh Joy! Uncle Ned will love it.

@PurplePawprints Remind me not to piss you off. I'm not scared of you using the knife, I'm simply afraid you'd gift it to me.

@kylewood Stop stalking me! I never told you about my Uncle Ned! You're creeping me out now.

@Cinoclav Hey now, knives make great gifts! Don't they? I mean, I figured it was better than guns, anyway.

@PurplePawprints Personally, I'd like an official Red Ryder carbine action, two hundred shot, range model air rifle. (And if that isn't an opening for the standard response, I give up.)

@Cinoclav You'll shoot your eye out, kid.

Ditto for the main office door. The convenience far outweighs the very, very, very slim risk of identity theft.

@cblack Same for me, don't even need to take the wallet out, just butt bump the reader

@The_Tim Some new drivers licenses, including mine, include an RFID chip with personally identifying information. I prefer to keep that blocked as much as possible.

@DJP519 I would just sleeve that with an RFID blocking sleeve than block the entire wallet

@Kyle83 should say that now. you were too quick.

@ChadP Well, It would not be a TV purchase if we did not say "AND THAT'S NOT ALL! If you purchase now you get two, yes two......"

@mossygreen I update with: eccentric-applicable-knife.

@mossygreen So applicable!

@JonT And I only bought one, so it's grammatical as well! Spooky.

@mossygreen the order words system is one of my favorite things that I helped work on :)

@JonT It is a thing of beauty that I fully expect to be a joy forever.

@cblack it's 2. updated for clarity. 1 unit is a 2 pack.

@Cirrius Just think of it as a bunch of stuff that Uncle Ezra might have purchased for you at 3:00AM.

@404 good now.

@404 May have been a conspiracy against our sale. Yah never know.

@heartny I actually still have my flashing usb wootoff lights from a 2008 bag. I am forbidden from using them from the wife but I do still have them.

@Outofmymind mine broke 2 weeks after I got them....

@somf69 Mine probably would have if it wasn't for the fact I only have them out every 3-4 years for a minute. Of 2 bags those and the space gun is all that remains. The space gun makes about 20 sound effects. We use it to make the cats run from the door when we come in.

@Outofmymind I have two sets of flashing usb wootoff lights, not sure what year. They are somewhere amongst the other random crap.

@heartny Ooh, I have a couple of sets that are sitting in their boxes. It just occurred to me that since I now own several usb battery packs I could use those lights anywhere!

@heartny You want lights? Here's your stinkin' lights!

@Outofmymind There must be an IFTTT script that would only turn them on when a bag's up on either site...

@Cynamon it's 2.

@ChadP terrestrial-theatrical-crook

@Cynamon They are quite hefty.

@sp3ar I was totally entertained!

@hih934 I agree, there is so much crap for so cheap, but it is just too crappy. I have found far better things in dumpsters.

@Thumperchick 짤줍짤줍

@Thumperchick

@lowlypeon It was made in China so it has a 50% lead content by default.

@Outofmymind

@lowlypeon it has a highly technical design feature inside. thin, paper-like metal. kitchen grade i think.

@lowlypeon It is HDPE, not paper, but to be fair HDPE won't block rfid either.

@JT954 Original packaging, though only Knife is in retail packaging.

@JT954 The Pancake Pans are well built and solid. I smell grilled cheese. mmmmm

@WilhelmScreamer You'll use the pancake maker.

@WilhelmScreamer The wallets I am going to unload on my nephews at Xmas with cash in them. Going to give one pancake pan to wife to do whatever she does and other my dad. I got the package basically for the knife to put into my bad weather bag.

@Outofmymind solid.

@Outofmymind good plan

@WilhelmScreamer ebay?

@WilhelmScreamer is the knife actually decent? It seems like most of the "survival knives" I've ever seen are cheap made in China crap..

@kadagan I'll let you know when it gets here. It probably is shit and I'll just stick to my leatherman for most uses anyways. Oh god damnit why did I spend money on this?

@kadagan For a $10 pack that the knife is simply part of, no one should be expecting a everyday hunting knife by any means. That said it does have some useful things in the handle that would make it perfect it for short term/emergency use. In the event of a long term zombie invasion, use your cheap weapons to obtain much higher quality stuff.

@Outofmymind Or simply use the pancake pans. I'd imagine swinging those things would easily splatter some zombie brains.

@Outofmymind I'm tempted just for the wallets, but meh.

@kadagan ive never seen the knife in person, ive never handled it, but i can say with certainty it is NOT decent.

@jihiggs That's exactly what I was thinking.. haha

@kadagan First of all, it says "As Seen on TV." haha. Second, after not seeing it in the specs here or a quick Google search, there is nothing about the steel used (all it says is material "metal.) That does not inspire confidence when a company does not list the blade material.

@devyanks90 I did.

@devyanks90 woohoo! That was unexpected. After the second time through it gets really entertaining.

@devyanks90 I'm completely captivated.

@devyanks90 I was totally entertained!

@Guy767 You SMOKED extra strength Nyquil?

@Kyser_Soze sure- if it's "vintage", it's flamable as hell. the new stuff, not so much. and don't ask how i know this.

@Kyser_Soze who hasn't

@Kyser_Soze Baah, hoisted by my own petard. I did imagine I ate a chocolate TV and then saw static after drinking Nyquil though; true story bro. However I didn’t encounter any "As Seen On TV” crap inside the chocolate TV thank The Sauce & Pasta. Perhaps your Nyquil vision was different?

@Alien Million dollar idea.

@Alien Sitting here trying to figure out if that would make it easier for you to buy it, or easier for you NOT to buy it.

@gertiestn prayer has been submitted to Flying Spaghetti Monster for you

@denboy As an ordained Pastafarian minister I say ramen to that.

@Cyd Always comforting to know I'm among fellow Al dente Noodle Brethren. May Sauce and Pasta be upon you.

@Guy767 once you're touched by the noodly appendage there's no going back

@denboy - I'm a Frisbeetarian. We believe that when you die your soul goes up to the roof and gets stuck. I guess that's where George Carlin is now.

@KDemo If I become one does that mean I get to hang with Carlin? If so I'm willing to consider a new path.

@denboy - One way to find out . . .

@denboy And so it is written: the flying spaghetti monster swooped down and scooped up his matey George who was wondering wtf he was doing stuck on a roof. Ramen.

@Tronne because you hate money and love garbage

@Choo 배대지에 하나만 빼달라고 해도 이득일듯.. 한데요?ㅋ

@Stallion That is very messy to hold that way. Must eat quickly.

@Wazanator Hey! I was just thinking of that.

@unixrab

@JonT

@unixrab I see what you did there. I love me some "Lorem ipsum."

@R4nd0mH3r0 Wow, talk about a Meh way to start a relationship. Be prepared for plenty more Meh'ness in the future. Get a VMP membership if you haven't yet, and start buying way more crap than you need.

@cengland0 I was totally against this until watching the video. Now I'm considering it.

@TBoneZeOriginal what the heck was he doing for the first 1:40 it looks like he didn't even flip it over till then

@chellemonkey I skipped to 1:40 as suggested, so I have no idea. :-P

@cengland0 I watched the video without sound, and it makes me want one.. I was thinking I could cook two pancakes, an egg, and a sausage patty, and have a breakfast sandwich all at once!

@chellemonkey He was only talking about audible dot com and a couple book reviews that he's "reading"

@TBoneZeOriginal I meh last nite drinking, ended up back here 'sober', watched video. raging rude hunchback. I'm smarter drunk.

@kadagan Maybe someday these will appear in our fukubukuros: http://www.hamiltonbeach.com/breakfast-breakfast-sandwich-maker-25475.html

@cengland0 there is a rejection hotline in most area codes.

@PocketBrain If it was there'd be no place to store the other useless crap that's sure to immediately break!

@Cinoclav Yeah, I know. But Pumpkin and Georgia Red are boring me; I'm starting a new thing.

@PocketBrain UNBELIEVABLE! WE NEED MORE TANG!

@dashcloud All aboard the disappointment train, seats are filling up fast.

@dashcloud

@JonT I have abandoned all expectations for this site

@unixrab Then we have succeeded.

@JonT then you are now caught in a logical dilemma as success != mediocre . Perhaps you should strive not to succeed but only to moderately non-progress in mediocrity ?

@johnT

@unixrab "Only a mediocre person is always at his best."

@phatmass Is that a Texas thing? I lived most of my life as a northeastern Yank and never heard anyone call that second pic a turner, always a spatula. Have I really been living a lie?

@phatmass I grew up in NY and have never heard the latter called a "turner". Spatulas all the way down!

@phatmass Spatula. Turners are terrible at pancake flipping.

@phatmass Spatula is such an awesome word it should be expanded to mean even more things.

@phatmass Both are spatulas, only of different styles. The first pictures is a bowl scraper, the second is a turner spatula. Both fit the definition of spatula. don't let the world tell you that they aren't.

@phatmass Those ain't called "turners" in the midwest. On that you can trust me.

@denboy You ALL have been living a lie. Don't believe me? Look on amazon or any chef supply site and try to purchase a "spatula"--and you'll be in the wrong section. You'll need to go to the "turner" section to get what you really want. Don't feel bad. I was fooled for most of my life as well.

@phatmass Weird All says you are wrong:

@phatmass wrong

@Stallion It's okay, I got two, for my "Bad Santa" bag.

@PocketBrain great idea! After I looked again and saw how many different possible gifts were in the mix I jumped in. That pancake thing looked like a joke but the reviews are actually decent, and if my wife isn't doing the making, I can now make perfect pancakes myself! The wallets look like cardboard but that's cool for the price.

@Stallion Yeah, just be careful how you grab the handle on the pancake maker.

@brianmc1975 yeah - maybe that green thing at other end of the whistle is it?

@snapster No. That green thing is what you rub against the flint to cause it to spark.

@brianmc1975 They are included. I just pulled them out. Magic Trackpad for scale.

@ChadP Awesome! Thanks, what a lovely Mehgic Trackpad you have.

@brianmc1975 Thanks. It almost lit on fire. Apparently I can't be trusted with flint.

@ChadP Now we need something for scale next to the Mehgic Trackpad.

@Cinoclav

@joelmw That was exactly my thought process. But not only did I buy... I bought last night in case it sold out before I got up.

@editorkid I might have too, but I'm on a meh moratorium (on orders from the wife), at least until I get paid tomorrow. I just wanted to make it look like I have will power. I have none. Hence the moratorium.

@Bingo Ahhh, but with two of the grillers you can now make 8 round grilled cheese sandwiches at once!

@RedOak Aaaannnnd, I'm back to lovin' the single life.

@unixrab That's why.

@unixrab That isn't at all how you make a Tyvek wallet.

@Moose griddle too hot, batter too loose. Your stupid round pancake pan can't fix that. Sure you'll end up with something round - but burnt and soggy in the middle. ....

@unixrab Nah, even with good batter and a cooler griddle, one can still screw it up.

@Moose c'mon...look at those pour marks... that's on purpose. round pancakes come from pouring in one non-moving stream! I call BS!

@unixrab Look at the pancake pro over here. Sorry I'm not Guy Fieri

@Moose yeah... this is advanced rocket sciency stuff right here:

@unixrab How about this use - camping. means you don't need a spatula, or a frying pan for breakfast. you can cook it all up in that one handy multi-tasker! (Assume that you wouldn't already have the larger pan utensils for other meals.) :D

@PocketBrain The Dakotans are a practical, no-nonsense people (that's my theory and/or stereotype at least). Despite its airs, this deal is all-nonsense.

@JT954 Are you feeding birds pancakes?

@JT95

@Moose Nooo, silly. He's cooking his birds.

@Moose Some bird experts warn bird owners of the dangers of using Teflon. Apparently it can give off fumes that are toxic to birds.

@JT954 Mammal lungs just suck compared to bird and dinosaur lungs. For a given amount of oxygen gathering capacity, our lungs are huge and heavy. The smaller, more efficient bird lungs do have the disadvantage that they have a lot less surface area, and therefore a lot less tolerance for toxins. If someone succeeds at creating a Jurassic Park, then the dinosaurs would be as sensitive to air pollution as the proverbial canary in a coal mine. In case of dinosaur attack, just use a welding torch on a teflon coated pan. The dinosaurs will drop.

@hamjudo "In case of dinosaur attack, just use a welding torch on a teflon coated pan. The dinosaurs will drop." I can't wait to try it!

@alacrity and it sold out while you were doing so

@readnj hush- i'm teaching my roomba to chase itt's tail...

@alacrity don't let your leak frog know it may get jealous

@readnj thats why they each get their own floor- the roomba hates stairs, but it's so cute when it tries.

@Cinoclav "Gave so desperately to feel once again" man that's deep.

@Cinoclav Hmm... I don't see any equivalent Korean word for Schnauzer in the Korean post.

@Cinoclav 싼게 = very cheap (Not ssange)^^

@hamjudo In my first pseudo-omelet experiment, I started with two eggs and about a quarter of a cup of other stuff. I foolishly tried to cook that amount of stuff in two pockets. Omelet overload. It tasted fine, but I had to clean the stove. So the rule is: if you add stuff to your eggs, use more pockets. I would guess that most of you are smart enough not to make that mistake.

@hamjudo My wallet died of old age a few months ago. I took it apart. There was a thin layer of aluminum foil folded inside the Tyvec.

I bet when the wallet was new, that was one piece of aluminum foil. Zoom in to see that the foil has turned into flakes.

I switched to the second wallet.