Are you ready for some (fantasy) football?

@therealjrn I would give up fantasy football before I ever gave up my Gemmy. Wait! I don’t play fantasy football…

@Barney gone? Like gone, gone? Oh no!

@elimanningface Yep, gone as in no longer employed by Mediocre.

@Barney @elimanningface
/giphy R.I.P. woodhouse

@Barney @elimanningface @therealjrn

@Barney Meh knows my credit card is real- does that count?

@sammydog01 My guess is that it’s very important to Meh. But that’s just a guess.

@sammydog01 for commissioner!

@elimanningface @sammydog01

@sammydog01 I don’t mind being a commish. I already do it for a couple other leagues, but I don’t have to. I don’t mind it either way.

@zinimusprime

Thanks! I figure if we get over 12 or so people who want to play we might want to split into 2 leagues- I can do the second.

@sammydog01

@sammydog01 @therealjrn @emilyap I’ve always wondered is it emil yap or emily ap?

Yes, this is just one of the many things I contemplate rather than wash the dishes.

I also wonder why @ruouttaurmind is invisible.

@Barney Or could it be E. Milyap? E. M. Ilyap? Or maybe it’s an semordnilap for pay lime?

And… I’m invisible, so you probably can’t read any of this.

@ruouttaurmind Damn, I’m never going to get my dishes done.

Emily A. P.

@emilyap But are you playing fantasy football this year? Say yes!

@sammydog01 Sure, someone’s gotta come in last!

@emilyap Last year it was me so you’re welcome to it.

@sammydog01 I’M IN!!!

@brendles @zinimusprime volunteered. I may have to buy him (her?) a commissioner shirt.

@brendles @sammydog01 You can feel free to buy me (a “him”) one, but I may or may not already have my own…

Some refer to me as “that guy”.

@zinimusprime Nope, I don’t like fantasy football. Always been more of a sci-fi football person

@zinimusprime tmorg184@gmail.com let’s do this

@alan21615 @zinimusprime IS THIS WHERE I WHISPER?? HOW DO I WHISPER???

@Moose You won’t get any argument from me. I prefer tasers to swords.

@zinimusprime sent!

Just sent out the invites. We need one more! cough @elimanningface cough

@elimanningface @zinimusprime I did not get/see an invite.Please advise.

@connorbush @zinimusprime sorry, Connor - I just sent a request myself. Be my +1 so we both get in!

@connorbush It looks like there’s a team with your name on it.

@zinimusprime facepalm. I’ve been waiting for the draft date notification in yahoo. Just realized you said ESPN no wonder it was not updating lol

Just saw my team. At least I didn’t get Andrew Luck, Gronk, and Peyton Manning

@connorbush lol, this just made my day.

@Teripie so far there’s 13-14 people interested. If we can get more, I’ll run two 8-10 people leagues.

@zinimusprime am I too late? I just saw this thread but I do love fantasy football

@zinimusprime Thursday would be great, but as long as I know in advance I’ll set up autodraft if I’ll be at work.

@brendles @zinimusprime I generally autodraft because it’s like opening a birthday present when you check your team. Except last year when I got Le’veon Bell. So I’m OK with most anytime. Can you set up autodraft to not get Le’veon Bell?

@sammydog01 You know you just jinxed yourself, right?

@brendles Want to trade?

@sammydog01

@sammydog01 no, he/she did not sign up yet. Neither has @nodnetni or @ConAndLibrarian Can you help me wrangle them up.

@ConAndLibrarian @nodnetni @zinimusprime @elimanningface SIGN UP GUYS!

@elimanningface I’m going to be super pissed off if I don’t get the chance to stomp your team into the ground this year.

@zinimusprime I only see one empty slot in the league.

@sammydog01 The last spot is for @ConAndLibrarian. If he doesn’t grab it 24 hours, I’ll give it to the next person that asked that isn’t in the league yet.

@zinimusprime OK- what happened to @elimanningface? Isn’t he playing?

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime Sorry, I will log on right now. BTW, I did not get an email, did I miss something?

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime I’m in!!

@ConAndLibrarian @sammydog01 I’ll resend the invites, but double check your email and spam. I’ve probably sent the invite email 3 times by now and if you didn’t get it I might have your email wrong.

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime I found it and joined. Thanks!

@ConAndLibrarian @zinimusprime

@ConAndLibrarian @sammydog01 @zinimusprime crap, did I miss out?

@elimanningface YOU’RE ALIVE! I think @zinimusprime offered to make it a 14 team league. You might have to beg though.

@nodnetni You are a gentleman and a scholar

@zinimusprime I’m confused- I see team 9 as the only open slot. Who does that belong to?

@Barney There’s always a bunch of them when it comes to signing up for fantasy football. The best is when you play with the same people and they start asking you what their ESPN login is…

@Barney @zinimusprime I’m pretty sure that’s the email receivers’ fault and not the email sender’s.

@sammydog01 I guess, I’ve never played it. How much money does it cost?

@therealjrn We generally play for zero dollars.

@sammydog01 Zero dollars? Zero? I have zero dollars!

@elimanningface Hey, I’m pretty sweet too, joining just for you…that is if we ever get our invites.

@elimanningface Nope, not me. I’m going for Antonio Brown.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 Everyone will go for Antonio! He helped me win the very first Meh Superbowl.

@elimanningface @Teripie That was with Roethlisberger and before he decided to take on the NFL about helmet design. Everyone can have him.

Yes, I’m still bitter about Le’Veon Bell last year.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @Teripie There might be enough for 2 8 team leagues. We’re already at 12 and I think theres 4 more that want to play. I gotta go back through this thread and check it out which I will do today.

Or I can just make the league with 16 teams since we’re not playing for $$$, lol.

@zinimusprime @therealjrn - thank you!

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @zinimusprime I think 2 leagues of 8 would be better. The first year we had a 16 team league and that made for slim pickens when it came to draft or pick up a free agent. Those with poor teams were pretty much shit out of luck. I was lucky I had a great draft number and I wen for the big time stars. Somehow I managed to get some great players. At the end of the season I won the league, but I did it with almost all of my team I had originally drafted. I was just lucky.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @Teripie @zinimusprime I hope I can get that Andrew Luck guy…he’s pretty good, right?

@elimanningface @Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime make sure you get Nathan Peterman as a backup. That kid is amazing.

@sammydog01 @Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime I saw the same team draft Lamar Miller in the seventh round and Andrew Luck in the eighth round yesterday. then I saw a Dimitri Martin stand up special on Netflix last night. That’s a pretty entertaining Sunday night.

@sammydog01 @Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime Gruden is very high on the PeterMan.

@elimanningface @Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime. I want to be in a league with that guy.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @Teripie @therealjrn had to do a bunch of stuff with the kids tonight when I got home from work. I’m going to look into getting a second league started tomorrow.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @Teripie @zinimusprime

@elimanningface @Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime I don’t care how it works I just wanna play.

@zinimusprime

@elimanningface @zinimusprime That little bird was too sad. There’s time!

@elimanningface @sammydog01 @zinimusprime

@therealjrn I like you .

@elimanningface @zinimusprime Now we’re almost out of time. Any chance of getting elimanningface and one other team in there before draft time?

@elimanningface @sammydog01 yeah, since it’s just a funsies league, I’m adding everyone I can.

This week has been kicking my bum.

@elimanningface @zinimusprime Most of us kind of suck at it too. Sorry about your week.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 it hasn’t been bad, just non-stop. I’m going to start adding people soon.

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime

@zinimusprime @sammydog01 Team JRN reporting in. Do I need to do or set anything up at this point? Is there a FAQ or a tutorial I can look at?

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime Oh I found some links on the left side of the page. BBL

@therealjrn @zinimusprime My recommendation? Auto draft. You’ll get the top available players using espn’s ranking. You can do research and switch it up some if you want. There are a couple of players I plan on skipping. And, whatever you do, get Andrew Luck. That guy is awesome!

POPSOCKETS! SPROCKETS! DAVY CROCKETT! AWESOME!

@zinimusprime Ooh, a free-for-all! I like it!

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime I don’t know how to auto draft. It says snake draft right now. Is there a button or a switch or something to set?

@therealjrn Do nothing at all. The computer will pick players for you. I usually completely forget to even check it. That’s right @zinimusprime, isn’t it?

@sammydog01 Do nothing? Nothing at all? FINALLY A SPORT I’M GOOD AT!!!

@therealjrn I know, right? Ask @carl669. He played a whole season doing nothing at all. He even beat my son with half his team on bye or injured reserve. Poor Snowflake.

@sammydog01 @therealjrn ah yes… that was my best fantasy football season ever! whenever I actually tried, I failed miserably. but the one time I forget, I win! (kind of)

so the moral of the story is, never try and you could be a winner too!

@sammydog01 @therealjrn do nothing.

@zinimusprime I am here! I am here!

@zinimusprime Sunday is good. Monday before 1500 EST is good for me too.

@zinimusprime Anytime I guess, do I have to be there?
If I have to be there early morning time is best. I’m liable to be out and about the later the day gets.

@zinimusprime I just figured out how to not draft certain players so anytime at all is good for me.

@zinimusprime I don’t want any assholes on my team. How do I block the assholes from being on my team?

@therealjrn @zinimusprime Just pick up kickers. They’re rarely assholes. Well sometimes.

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime Got it.

@zinimusprime JRN, district 13

I am NOT advocating or suggesting this but if @zinimusprime stepped down does that deactivate the entire league?

@elimanningface lol yes

@zinimusprime Boy, this takes a long time, doesn’t it? 18 teams X 1 minute X how many ever slots?

@therealjrn if people just auto draft it should be quick. But every time someone rejoins it takes them off of auto-draft.

@therealjrn @zinimusprime I was just checking. I should be back to auto draft. Did I do good round 1?

@zinimusprime I was going to watch it, but it got boring pretty quick, watching the clock count down 1 minute at a time. Was I slowing it down by watching it?

@zinimusprime not going to lie, lost track of time and missed the draft. @sammydog01’s suggestion of doing nothing got me a pretty good football team. Fantasy football team though, we’ll find out. Good luck everyone but mostly good luck to me!

@elimanningface With your geriatric QB? Maybe.

@Teripie we can do that or Facebook messenger. If we decide to use slack, could someone else set it up?

@Teripie @zinimusprime I’m not doing FaceBook so I guess that leaves me out.

@Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime also, we can communicate here. Public shaming can do wonders for the psyche.

@elimanningface @Teripie @zinimusprime I’m planning on doing some public winning, so…

I just don’t like using FaceBook so much. My FaceBook has gotten a little unwieldy. Originally, it was so I could get pictures and communicate with my family…but I exhibited little sef-control and now have an abundance of “friends” that I don’t even know. Or, on the other hand, I have “friends” who seem to over-share to an alarming degree.

My favorite ones are the hostage takers who don’t believe anybody reads their posts so I have to “prove it” by co-signing on their bullshit and copy/post whiny crap to MY page. lol nope.

But I can hang here, or somewhere else. Doesn’t that ESPN thing have a chat?

@Teripie @therealjrn @zinimusprime oh yeah, it does, haha. Smart thinking @therealjrn.

@brendles Oh, I’m new too. I don’t know about the picks except I think we have a bunch of teams so the league manager shortened the size of our teams.

Why do I have these guys marked “questionable” in my roster?

@brendles this is super experimental. To accommodate all 18 people who wanted to join, @zinimusprime had to make some adjustments. I guess an incentive to join the draft is to draft as many players who share the same bye week.

@brendles I assume since everyone has the same problem it will even out. It was either that or roster the bottom feeders who don’t score points.

@therealjrn Your questionable players have boo boos. If they’re projected to get 0 points they probably won’t play. Sucks to be you.

@sammydog01 Why, why, is DOES suck to be me! How did you know?

@brendles so you’re right. To accommodate the number of people that wanted to play I had to try and get creative. Normally, there’s 10-12 football nerds with a total roster of 16 players for a total of 160-192 players being drafted. So with 18 people I shortened the rosters to 10 (8 starters and 2 bench). This way you’re either forced to ride out bye weeks and potentially take a lose or drop good players thereby giving a chance to worse teams to improve. Since we’re a league for funsies I figured it was worth a shot.

@zinimusprime. challenge accepted, lol. This could be interesting!

@sammydog01 You also have 3 key players that are all on bye week! I have also have 3 on bye in week 12. Ugh…

@sammydog01 We also play each other this week!

@Teripie Cool! I think @elimanningface had the concept right- pick players with the same bye and plan on losing that week. I did not do that. It will make managing short term injuries interesting.

@sammydog01 @Teripie it’ll all be okay if I win. Just remember that. Always remember that.

@elimanningface @sammydog01 You need to remember who you’re talking smack to! The 2016 champ!

@elimanningface @Teripie I’m gonna beat both your asses-
signed, 2015 and 2017 champ
(please don’t ask about 2018)

@f00l

There ya go.

@therealjrn THURSDAY NIGHT!

@Teripie New strategy time!

@zinimusprime It was for me.

@sammydog01 @zinimusprime I don’t know what kind of start I had.

@therealjrn @zinimusprime

Although you haven’t lost yet.

@therealjrn A perk to owning the crappiest team in the league is you are first in waiver order. Yay!

The computer opens all the players that aren’t on other teams as available early Wednesday mornings. So if you have a player that underperformed or broke something or got fired you can get a shiny new player that overperformed or who’s competition broke something or got fired. And this week you get first choice!

I was first in waiver order almost every week last year. It was awesome!

Just hit claim on a player you like and pick the player to drop. If you are trying for more than one player make sure the one you want most is in the first position. The computer does the rest and when you wake up on Wednesday you can see your new team!

LEGOS! EGGOS! STRATEGO! AWESOME!

@brendles This week is gonna be great! I have Sammy Watkins!

@brendles @sammydog01 I have fingers! 10!

@sammydog01 Uhh…I meant to do that. lol

@therealjrn Snowflake played a guy on injured reserve and won. He has all the luck.

@elimanningface Only one player in double digits? Oops.

@sammydog01

@elimanningface Guess who else just lost? At least I outscored you.

@sammydog01

@elimanningface I heard that It’s unfortunate things didn’t work out with the Patriots, but Antonio is healthy and is looking forward to his next opportunity in the NFL. He wants to play the game he loves and he hopes to play for another team soon.

@sammydog01

…oh and

@elimanningface Oh yeah? Well I moved up in the waiver order. So there.

@sammydog01
/image funny waiver bump

@sammydog01 I have no “it” to bring

@brendles But you have Tyreek Hill back! Or did he get hurt again?

@sammydog01 Nah, just two bye week players, but that’s enough. Congrats in advance on your win this week!

@brendles You take all the fun out of gloating.

@sammydog01 Then my work here is done.

@sammydog01 I had to google who the ‘Money Badger’ is. That is an awesome nickname!!

@elimanningface I find the more I play the more I look at stuff other than how good a player is. Cool story? Check. Runs a nice charity? Check. Beats up women, throws tantrums, or plays for the Pats? Keep them.

And I’m not just saying that because I’ve been mathematically eliminated from the playoffs. Not at all.

@sammydog01 Lol, all in fun but I think a lot of sports fans agree with the first point you made. Do you remember that Sports Illustrated article about players having illegitimate children and such? Reading that absolutely crushed me. Lesson learned - don’t worship false idols.

@elimanningface No.

@sammydog01 so you’re the Chiefs?

@sammydog01 you’re welcome!

@sammydog01 with Bills players nonetheless. Some people catch all the breaks.

@elimanningface I know, right? Playing the Dolphins helped. GO BILLS!

Aww, giphy, you picked a good one.

@sammydog01 you and tables, lol

@sammydog01 Dragontrainer just pointed out that we have an 8 team playoff. Thanks @zinimusprime!

How does Alshon Jeffery have zero points? Shit.

@sammydog01 because he is out of the game. Why is your table still upright?

@elimanningface I’m an adult. It’s not whether you win or lose it’s how you play the game. I was only playing for fun anyway. Sometimes a team with a lower score advances when you don’t because it just happens. Sometimes the love list player you were counting on to win you the game has a non contact injury early in the game and you get fucked over.

I HAD FUN DAMMIT! CAN’T YOU TELL?

@elimanningface

@bullrocky That would be Rum Ham! Congrats whoever you are!

@jdude727 You’re the guy who knocked me out of the playoffs, right?