Product: 72-Pack: Maxim Tailor Made Condoms + Handful of Lubricant
Model: MX13002, MX13006, MX13010, MX24001TE, MX13004, MX13008, MX13012
Condition: New
Maxim Tailor Made Condoms
Designed to fit like a glove, MAXIM Perfect Fit Condoms offer a tailored shape with silky-smooth lubricant for enhanced pleasure and reliable protection against pregnancy, HIV/AIDS, and STDs
Tailor-made for max pleasure with a contoured head and secure fit, these condoms are vegan and free of animal by-products
Electronically triple-tested for strength and durability, these condoms ensure maximum protection without compromising sensation
Featuring a water-based formula, MAXIM condoms offer safe, worry-free experiences with lubrication that prevents breakage, leakage, and slippage
Maxim H2O Lubricant
Easy clean-up and non-sticky, compatible with latex condoms
Available Packs
Perfect Fit + Sensation + Stimulation + Lubricant, Pro Fit + Sensation + Stimulation + Lubricant, XL Fit + Sensation + Stimulation + Lubricant, Strength + Sensation + Stimulation + Lubricant, Strength + Lubricant, XL Fit + Lubricant, Pro Fit + Lubricant, Perfect Fit + Lubricant
I don’t know if you should buy condoms from a place like Meh. They didn’t sell well for some kind of reason.
While we’re in the neighborhood, does anyone find it funny that there’s a lane in the Walgreens that’s like
Condoms, Lube, Pregnancy test, diapers.
I know a comedian did that joke already but it’s funny how forward that is.
@TrinSF
I would probably question the motives of whoever was donating condoms to me. Were they trying to stop me from procreating (friends), or were they sabotaging them in order to foster grandkids (parents)?
I have been fortunate to live in California my entire life. While we are not perfect, we are better than most of the rest of this goddess forsaken place.
Its awesome that places are available today, even though more is needed. As an openly (mostly) bisexual pagan (probably should say pansexual, but that is a newish term and doesn’t feel as comfortable as how I have identified my entire life) who came of age when being bisexual was stigmatized by both sides (as they were identified then) I empathize but cannot really internalize with what young queer people are going through today.
@Cerridwyn As I say to the kids these days, “there’s a reason the 90’s bisexual 'zine was called Anything That Moves and not Anything That Moves But Only Identifies As a Binary Gender.” There have always been omnivorous bisexuals.
And yep, California for sure. Even here, it’s hard to keep uh, special interest spaces open.
@xterraguy Shooting blanks may reduce your liability but there are still risks when playing with guns
I assume you’re done gun-slinging and have found yourself an exclusive dueling partner hence you ain’t afraid of the dastardly scoundrel known as the Scabbie Dick
@mcanavino Isn’t it awfully nice to have a penis
Isn’t it frightfully good to have a dong
It’s swell to have a stiffy
It’s divine to own a dick
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world’s biggest prick
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake
Your piece of pork, your wife’s best friend
Your Percy, or your cock
You can wrap it up in ribbons
You can slip it in your sock
But don’t take it out in public
Or they will stick you in the dock
And you won’t come about
@DLPanther OK, I’ll stop being a goofball for a split second here.
The CDC actually has programs that subsidize condom distribution online. Further, buying through a digital payment method makes it easier to expense for HSA/FSA plans. Due to the price elasticity (hold that giggity, sirius business time) afforded by the value of proximity, condoms are actually marked up about 300% at gas stations and grocery stores.
@chuckf1 Real talk? For latex condoms, the insulating property of each is tested with really sensitive equipment. If a contact can pick up any current through contact with the probe it is assumed to be faulty.
I believe non-latex condoms are now tested with a laser sensor. Here’s a decade old how it’s made that shows the conductivity test:
Kudos to your friend for having the courage to ask questions, lack of knowledge does not make one ignorant, being too proud to ask does
@accelerator@OnionSoup I knew a couple who had 5 kids. They told us “#1 is the planned-for baby; #2 is the withdrawal baby; #3 is the condom baby; #4is the IUD baby, #5 is the pill baby” … that’s some unstoppable fecundity there.
@beachhead do like I do; get a can of that ASOTV rubber seal spray; you know that stuff they spray on a screen door and then make it into the bottom of a boat. It’s theoretical whether it will work. I’ve still not found a willing partner to try it out.
These would be a very wise purchase for anyone who is serious about birth control… especially those who live in certain states during these uncertain times.
@steelopus I noticed on the map that the states that haven’t bought any are the same states where they’re needed most. I’m glad to see my state is doing its part and buying a lot.
I guess the ultra strength ones are for people who really don’t want kids. As for the rest, I’m picturing men across the country looking for a measuring tape with metric markings to see how they measure up.
72 lifesavers, 72 virgins, hmmm. They should come in colors just like a box of 72 Crayolas. Adults use crayons too. Well, the ones that need their safe spaces. Can you use 'em all in 72 hours is the challenge.
We definitely need the “Who’s buying this crap” map broken down by ‘Who’s buying the <variant>’; full bore Cards-Against-Humanity-style ‘study’ analysis , age, gender, number of meh posts vs purchases, folks that get likes, meh-button-clicks, etc. This is an ecommerce experiment, right?
I’m pretty sure the unit on the thickness column is incorrect and should be mm like the other columns. A human hair is on the order of 50 micrometers wide. A condom 1,000 times thinner than a human hair seems implausible.
@IndifferentDude Made me wonder, With a name like “Dick’s Sporting Goods”, why don’t they sell condoms? Not living up to either the Dick’s
nor the Sporting Goods
As an event phototagrapher that has been at many events, this reminds me of one of my favorite pics ever, taken at a Pride event. This is a Planned Parenthood button:
Specs
Product: 72-Pack: Maxim Tailor Made Condoms + Handful of Lubricant
Model: MX13002, MX13006, MX13010, MX24001TE, MX13004, MX13008, MX13012
Condition: New
Maxim Tailor Made Condoms
Maxim H2O Lubricant
What’s Included?
Price Comparison
$134.40 (for 72) at Amazon
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Monday, Dec 2 - Wednesday, Dec 4
Today condoms what’s next, the dildo
@Cerridwyn They actually had some dildo/vibrator type things for sale a few years ago. Someone can probably dig up a link…
@Cerridwyn @shahnm and just like that, Bing’s search trends will see an uptick for ‘meh dildo’ ‘daily pandemic dildo’ ‘purple puppet sex toy’
No wonder y’all the GOAT
@Cerridwyn @shahnm Yup, someone definitely could…
(The bundle was $29.)
Not to make this about me, but this is one heck of a 40th birthday present.
@fuzzmanmatt
Happy Birthday!
@fuzzmanmatt
/showme happy 40th birthday
@fuzzmanmatt
@fuzzmanmatt haha ill be 40 too and was just thinking the same thing
Warranty? Does that include child support?
@ybmuG HAHAHA… You must be smoking something if you think it would include Child support!
@ybmuG 90 day Meh warranty
@ybmuG
/showme warranty child support
@ybmuG well we know in Texas, if they fail, you’re SOL
@robson @ybmuG 90 day must be a typo. Should read 9 month warranty. 🫃
@ybmuG I’m just wondering what…. Exact…. kind of proof they are going to ask us to send back to get a warranty claim
@awright69 If I’m them, I’d say “no questions asked”
Here for the comments…
Guess Meh will learn some things about their customers, based upon what they order…
Finally…
I will order some, in hopes Mom intercepts the package and finally stops asking about grandchildren
Apparently, my growing obsession with Pikachu cards (and the new mobile game) wasn’t enough
@onae make sure to order a pack of straight pins for delivery the same day
$14.99 for a lifetime supply sounds like a petty good deal.
@ShotgunX
I’m sorry your life expectancy is only 18 months : (
Are these refurbished?
@Num1Zero
Customer refurbished or factory?
@Num1Zero oh no
@Num1Zero Factory seconds.
@Num1Zero “I’d have replaced - but the regiment voted to have it repaired.”
Clicky-face. Ewww. 🫨
I don’t know if you should buy condoms from a place like Meh. They didn’t sell well for some kind of reason.
While we’re in the neighborhood, does anyone find it funny that there’s a lane in the Walgreens that’s like
Condoms, Lube, Pregnancy test, diapers.
I know a comedian did that joke already but it’s funny how forward that is.
The effort to measure in millimeters so they have the biggest numbers possible should not go unappreciated.
@djslack gotta know your target market
“Fit like a glove”?? My gloves could never be used for that.
@tweezak this has been a poorer expression than it once was for almost 30 years now.
@tweezak Maybe if you had four friends with you…
@ItalianScallion @tweezak
“Did you hear about the man with 5 penises?
His condoms fit like a glove”
@chienfou Well done, my man!
@ItalianScallion
Hard to beat the classics.
I’m thinkin’ the fittin’ process is going to be problematic at best.
Me looking at the side deal: “That’s not enough lube!”
Not really enough condoms either, but we get them donated so I don’t think we ever pay for them. #nonprofitproblems
@TrinSF
I would probably question the motives of whoever was donating condoms to me. Were they trying to stop me from procreating (friends), or were they sabotaging them in order to foster grandkids (parents)?
@TrinSF That sounds like something Diddy would say.
@chienfou Public health organizations. STI outreach organizations. I’m pretty sure the city itself gives them to us.
I run a nonprofit LGBTQ+ space.
@joelmw Bleah.
@TrinSF
Hero
@Cerridwyn
Someone’s gotta do it. Especially right now. It’s a little pocket of trans-affirming space in a terrible world.
@TrinSF I agree 100%
I have been fortunate to live in California my entire life. While we are not perfect, we are better than most of the rest of this goddess forsaken place.
Its awesome that places are available today, even though more is needed. As an openly (mostly) bisexual pagan (probably should say pansexual, but that is a newish term and doesn’t feel as comfortable as how I have identified my entire life) who came of age when being bisexual was stigmatized by both sides (as they were identified then) I empathize but cannot really internalize with what young queer people are going through today.
POKER! JOKER! NOT MEDIOCRE! AWESOME!
@Cerridwyn As I say to the kids these days, “there’s a reason the 90’s bisexual 'zine was called Anything That Moves and not Anything That Moves But Only Identifies As a Binary Gender.” There have always been omnivorous bisexuals.
And yep, California for sure. Even here, it’s hard to keep uh, special interest spaces open.
This should be fun…
What’s your return policy?
@sproinky Return of the purchased product or the product inadvertently made with it?
@Kidsandliz
@matthewjfazio no. I chose on purpose to go a different route.
@sproinky The return policy is 68.
Pro-fit… I’m more at the rec level
Got a vasectomy 20 years ago, haven’t needed a condom since. Best $20 co-pay ever
@xterraguy Shooting blanks may reduce your liability but there are still risks when playing with guns
I assume you’re done gun-slinging and have found yourself an exclusive dueling partner hence you ain’t afraid of the dastardly scoundrel known as the Scabbie Dick
@xterraguy The ol’ pickled pecker, the drippy dick, funk in the junk, fell bellend, sickie dicky, rot in the cok.
@onae Aye, serial monogamy FTW. My subsequent partners have very much appreciated it too.
@xterraguy Plot Twist: He’s gay.
@matthewjfazio Yeah, no…
@mcanavino Isn’t it awfully nice to have a penis
Isn’t it frightfully good to have a dong
It’s swell to have a stiffy
It’s divine to own a dick
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world’s biggest prick
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake
Your piece of pork, your wife’s best friend
Your Percy, or your cock
You can wrap it up in ribbons
You can slip it in your sock
But don’t take it out in public
Or they will stick you in the dock
And you won’t come about
(Thank you, Monty Python’s Flying Circus)
@ItalianScallion @mcanavino
teehee
Mac compatible?
@Kerig3 depends on whether it’s got a disc drive or not. So, maybe older models?
@Kerig3 Mac Daddy
@Kerig3 The XL Fit might be Mac-ximum compatible…
@Kerig3
Couch compatible?
/giphy alledgedly
@joelmw
Perfect timing for New York.
@hchavers hmm?
@hchavers Note to self: Stay away from New York
Oh wait, I think I noted that the first time I found myself in New York
@hchavers what’s going on here that I missed?
@hchavers @sflesch everything
@hchavers @sflesch apparently a big New York orgy coming up.
@hchavers @OnionSoup @sflesch As if there’s just one. Oh, people, every day and every night is a big orgy in NYC, if you know the right people.
@sflesch https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/new-york-repeals-1907-law-that-made-cheating-on-spouses-a-crime/ar-AA1uATL3?ocid=BingNewsVerp
This is gonna be a hit at my gift exchange!
@actionPacked THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT BY WHITE ELEPHANT!
@actionPacked @onae
Just pick a different color…
@actionPacked @onae Something something name of my sex tape.
Ah yes, the “Weekend Pack”
Can’t beat the price:
Balloons for the Christmas Parade float?
There’s never enough lubricant.
I want enough so that I can defrost a driveway.
Discount condoms… what could go wrong?
1, 2, 3, baby. 4, 5, 6, baby!
baby! baby! baby! baby!
@sgtron
/showme hit me baby one more time
Who else is waiting for a cotton?
I expected much more reaction to that. Oh well. Not a single mention of microfiber over here, either.
@xobzoo didn’t Benjamin Franklin use cottons (and was surprised he didn’t contract syphilis by the time he wrote his memoirs)
There’s questionable things I’m OK buying bulk quantities of on the internet. Condoms is not one of them.
@DLPanther if it’s any consolation, they’re marketed by a company large enough to have a (stub) company profile on Bloomberg’s website.
@DLPanther OK, I’ll stop being a goofball for a split second here.
The CDC actually has programs that subsidize condom distribution online. Further, buying through a digital payment method makes it easier to expense for HSA/FSA plans. Due to the price elasticity (hold that giggity, sirius business time) afforded by the value of proximity, condoms are actually marked up about 300% at gas stations and grocery stores.
As an example of gov subsidized programs offering free contraception, check out: https://www.positiveimpacthealthcenters.org/condoms/
@DLPanther @onae
Oh…COOL.
It’s an HSA/FSA PSA!
@DLPanther @onae EXACTLY THANK YOU.
We get them donated in part because there’s all kinds of federal/state funding to subsidize distribution.
somewhere back in the 90s there is lawyer associated with a risqué magazine waiting to sue the manufacturer of this product
@DLPanther Same brand as the magazine actually – these were licensed and distributed by Jimmy Jane, a fancy sex toy company
How are condems, “Electronically triple-tested for strength and durability”? Asking for a friend.
@chuckf1 Real talk? For latex condoms, the insulating property of each is tested with really sensitive equipment. If a contact can pick up any current through contact with the probe it is assumed to be faulty.
I believe non-latex condoms are now tested with a laser sensor. Here’s a decade old how it’s made that shows the conductivity test:
Kudos to your friend for having the courage to ask questions, lack of knowledge does not make one ignorant, being too proud to ask does
/showme a tailor making condoms
@mediocrebot
Nice!
What have me come to Meh?
/showme a exploding condom.
@mediocrebot I find this very upsetting.
@mediocrebot condom fail may be the reason I exist.
@accelerator @mediocrebot
In some quarters that would be considered texturing.
@accelerator @mediocrebot my parents were on vacation 9 months before I was born and my siblings are all 5+ years older than me.
I was definitely an accident.
@accelerator @OnionSoup I knew a couple who had 5 kids. They told us “#1 is the planned-for baby; #2 is the withdrawal baby; #3 is the condom baby; #4is the IUD baby, #5 is the pill baby” … that’s some unstoppable fecundity there.
@KSchweitz Is that image titled, “If Superman Used a Condom”?
It’s ai pics on here now? Bleh
@gameboy8877
/showme [bleh gameboy]
@mediocrebot looks like the one that survived the (Gulf) war
/showme a stick in the mud upset about ai pictures
waiting on LabRat report…
P Diddy wants to know if he can just get the lube
@marclove see “side deal”, and you too can be invited to the next “freak out”.
@marclove He will need it where he’s going.
Well, as usual, no XXXL size. Oh well, we’ll just have to go commando and hope for the best!
@beachhead you “beat me” to a comment similar to yours.
@beachhead do like I do; get a can of that ASOTV rubber seal spray; you know that stuff they spray on a screen door and then make it into the bottom of a boat. It’s theoretical whether it will work. I’ve still not found a willing partner to try it out.
@accelerator @beachhead
Maybe spray it on yourself instead of your partner?
Ahhhh. Nothing says “Happy Holidays” like a box of rubbers…
Wow… a 72 pack that expires in 18 months? Someone is REALLY overestimating how often your typical Meh user gets laid.
@danoinct LOL where as I think my nonprofit goes through that many in a week – and only that few because of PrEP.
Tailor made? Can I see who is coming to measure me? That may be a good or a bad selling point.
@IAMIS And possibly cause a mis-measurement.
Our office Dirty Santa this year might just take an unexpected turn…
I saw the photo and i thought Meh was selling VHS tapes. I must be getting old.
@mrdancer Getting?
NSFW
Banana for scale
@Kidsandliz $1 million ($5.2 million at Sotheby’s)
@Kidsandliz Looks safe for work to me.
NSFW
For @carl669
I went hunting for this especially for you.
@Kidsandliz and you did not disappoint!
@carl669 I thought you might like that. I’m on the road today but when I stopped for gas, I had to go hunting. The opportunity was just too good.
@carl669 @Kidsandliz
Pretty much the whole thread, don’t you think?
@carl669 @Kidsandliz @Kyeh not just this one…
Whose turn is it to do the post-sale size/model order analysis? We need the PowerPoint early because of the holiday.
These would be a very wise purchase for anyone who is serious about birth control… especially those who live in certain states during these uncertain times.
(Also… go get snipped, boys. Do your part.)
@steelopus I noticed on the map that the states that haven’t bought any are the same states where they’re needed most. I’m glad to see my state is doing its part and buying a lot.
I guess the ultra strength ones are for people who really don’t want kids. As for the rest, I’m picturing men across the country looking for a measuring tape with metric markings to see how they measure up.
@lisagd I did post above a banana for scale so that might help with the sizing
Think outside the box! Today’s meh is very useful even if you don’t need to prevent pregnancy or STD.
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/70950/15-non-sex-uses-condoms
@accelerator Maybe, but IMHO inside the box is the most fun application.
@accelerator @macromeh
ISWYDT
72 lifesavers, 72 virgins, hmmm. They should come in colors just like a box of 72 Crayolas. Adults use crayons too. Well, the ones that need their safe spaces. Can you use 'em all in 72 hours is the challenge.
@danexton
I’ve never not needed anything so much.
We definitely need the “Who’s buying this crap” map broken down by ‘Who’s buying the <variant>’; full bore Cards-Against-Humanity-style ‘study’ analysis
, age, gender, number of meh posts vs purchases, folks that get likes, meh-button-clicks, etc. This is an ecommerce experiment, right?
@caffeineguy I still have some of those CAH condoms. (Their instructions were clear: these were not for their intended manufacturer use)
With that expiration window, I’m guessing 90-100% of these will go in the posh wank drawer. Here’s hoping.
I refuse to buy condoms from anywhere except meh. I can finally lose my virginity. My wife will be so happy.
In case you’re wondering mm to in, ___ / 25.4 =
Came here for the comments and was not disappointed.
Birth control for a Little Person (fka midget): condominium…
@MrNews Condominimum.
Or Condominion?
Can’t wait until these show up in 2025 IRKs…
@sdoepper I thought about getting some to hand out at next years gift exchange too!
@sdoepper
/showme [surprise many condoms]
I’m pretty sure the unit on the thickness column is incorrect and should be mm like the other columns. A human hair is on the order of 50 micrometers wide. A condom 1,000 times thinner than a human hair seems implausible.
@IndifferentDude Made me wonder, With a name like “Dick’s Sporting Goods”, why don’t they sell condoms? Not living up to either the
Dick’s
nor the
Sporting Goods
As an event phototagrapher that has been at many events, this reminds me of one of my favorite pics ever, taken at a Pride event. This is a Planned Parenthood button:
None of you need this. Not a single one of you.