@guybrush01 I would ask you why it bothers you as much as it does, but I think the more accurate question is why does it bother you AT ALL? Hell, for all we know, the fact that it DOES bother someone that much might just be strengthening his resolve to continue. But honestly, in the grand scheme of everything, and in all these ‘interesting’ times we’re living in, and the wonders that still exist both in and out of the internet, if he likes being first in the comments, WHO FUCKING CARES? Seriously.
@Doooood@guybrush01 At 21:00 PST I am usually at the computer finishing my coffee and deciding on what music/movie to fall asleep to. I check out the new deal (or giant piece of carp) that gets posted at 22:00 MST (Meh Standard Time?). I sometimes comment on said item and that is why I get the first post sometimes at 23:00 CST. If you want to get the first comment just be here at 00:00 EST and try your luck. I am not racing anybody for the top spot so it is yours for the taking.
As for liking the fact that I get the first comment. That is not something I have attached any real feeling to. I don’t feel any different if I get the first comment or the tenth. I get more from the funny comments and fun conversations that arise in the comment section. That and the cat pictures.
I do enjoy harassing the occasional person that posts 1 letter and edits it later just so they can get the first post.
@guybrush01 I do find it really odd that it seems to bother you or anyone else at all.
Eh, the fine print on the label admits that it’s using trolamine salicylate as the actual active ingredient, but the large print makes it clear that the snake oil factor is what they’re using as their selling point. That’s the kind of marketing sliminess that even Ron Popeil didn’t sink to.
I ordered this several days ago from SideDeal (same price) and had it such a short time that I’ve tried it once – used it before bed on my knee (ache from combination of arthritis (I guess) and over-use).
It did seem to make a difference; didn’t think about my knee in the morning until I noticed the jar on my stand.
When using it, there is no immediate warmth like from most analgesic creams (BenGay, IcyHot).
Most negative (besides list price) is that it has a fairly oily feel that does not dissipate at all quickly, even with extensive massaging (slow absorbing). I slept with pajama bottoms on and there was no stain on my sheet.
The product’s odor is very slight (if you stick your nose to it) and not unsavory, so not really objectionable IMO.
I will continue to use it.
I think next time I will try it with a percussion massage gun through a towel and see if that speeds up both the absorption and the effect.
Edit: I forgot to mention: If you get this stuff, be aware that because of its oiliness and slow absorption, a very little goes a long way. A fingertip full would be a good start on a knee.
So it looks like the active ingredient is Trolamine Salicylate. Basically a chemical related to aspirin. So it should provide some minor pain relief to aches.
@alose@bgammill Hemp = Snake, sure enough. The trolamine salicylate is the same stuff that’s in Aspercreme, but the hemp crowd will buy it for the snake, er, hemp seed oil (that’s not even the hemp-derived stuff that has CBD in it) because they know that’s the part that “works”.
@werehatrack lol - hemp is “snake oil”?? I’d love to hand you 3 of theses and see how much you think it’s “snake oil” an hour later when you can barely stand up…
@Pufferfishy These are made with hemp SEED oil, which contains no CBD, and not much of anything except oleates. It’s derived from the wrong part of hemp. The stuff in your jar is not this stuff, and the people who make this crap are depending on people making exactly the same assumption that you did.
@Pufferfishy@werehatrack I believe they recently found a new cannabinoid derived from the shell of the seed. Look up HHC vape and you can find some info on it. It feels exactly like weed, right down to the paranoia. Unlike delta 8 with has never gotten me paranoid.
Hemp oil contains CBD.
Hemp SEED oil (what this product contains) has virtually ZERO CBD in it. What you’re buying here is a weak, off-brand Aspercreme.
If you want non-THC cannabinoid products, always check if it has hemp oil (from the plant) and has CBD, or hemp seed oil, which is just overpriced vegetable oil lacking CBD.
For those of you who are attempting to be a cereal killer from yesterday’s deal. Well you just might want to consider buying this. You could place a bit of it on your sore anus.
I have been suffering from a pain in my right hip for many months. When I stand from sitting, the pain is intense as I start to move, but lessens as I continue to move. I cannot sleep on my right side owing to pain in that area. Naproxen sodium and Aspercreme, Ben Gay, etc. help. Owing to Covid,
I haven’t seen a doctor about this lately, but I have had to have steroid and lidocaine injected into that hip joint in the past, and I do have osteoarthritis in the joint. So that was another reason for not rushing out to an orthopedist.
On a lark, I tried the Hempvana the last time it was offered, thinking what the hey, it can’t hurt any more than I am already hurting.
I didn’t put much stock in the hemp oil content, but recognized that the active ingredient is triethanol salicylate aka Trolamine salicylate.
I did note that the label listed hemp seed oil and not cannibidiol or CBD. Therefore I did not figure since it wasn’t described on the label that there was much, if any CBD, in the concoction. Hence the name and the hemp seed oil in the formulation are just a marketing gimmick and perhaps has more of a placebo value than any real therapeutic effect.
It is a pale green, thin creme, which has little to no odor. It is non staining. It is easy to apply and dries quickly on the skin.
I have had quite a bit of benefit from daily use of the creme once or twice a day. My pain, while not gone, is greatly lessened.
To be sure, I could probably have done about as well with one of the other commercial odorless cremes which contain neither menthol nor methyl salicylate (oil of wintergreen) but are also based on triethanol amine salicylate. For some reason, I have been more regular in my use of the Hempvana creme.
Because my pain is in my hip, it is an additional bother to have to drop one’s drawers to apply it. Perhaps most of the reason that I am getting more out of the Hempvana is because I put a jar of it in the bathroom!
I had a horrible pain down the inside of my right leg for about a year, thinking it was groin or something, just a pulled muscle. The leg would just give out, go limp noodle on me, at times. I quit driving because of it, it would take me a good three or four minutes to even get in the passenger seat in the car.
Finally went to the doc. He shook his head, sent me down to x-ray. My hip joint was bone on bone. The cartilage was gone. (I seriously had a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that a bad hip was causing the pain on the inside of my leg.) Meds, physical therapy, nothing was going to fix it except surgery.
I was in pain for over two years. Surgery took care of the problem.
One of the reasons I waited for as long as I did after diagnosis was I wanted Medicare to kick in.
The surgery was outpatient (I was in and out that same day) and cost us $250. With our insurance it would have been $6500.
I well understand that a hip replacement could be in my future. However, I prefer to put off that as long as possible. I have had too many friends and family, including my late younger sister, who have had either hip or knee replacements end up with bone infections at the surgery site. And I have been down that road as well.
I broke my right tibia and fibula seven years ago early one morning late at night by slipping on a wet front step. Long story, but I ended up with a metal rod in my tibia and a plate on the fibula along with a lot of bone screws – tastefully arranged, of course, along my leg, top and bottom, by drilling straight through the skin into the bone and hardware.
Nine months after the fall and the metal work repair, I got an infection in the fibula area at one of the screw sites.
Three operations, one more infection in the upper tibia area (another screw site again, but a different cootie), and two peripherally inserted central catheters (PICC line ports) and two 42-day continuous pumped infusions of antibiotics (total of 2.4 lbs of infused, very $$$$ wonder drugs) and sixty days of oral antibiotics later, I am well on my way to being passively bionic or at least more titanium-rich in terms of body mass than the average bear.
I don’t glow in the dark as yet, but I do set off the metal detectors in every security check point without fail. And my lower right leg looks like it has seen some rough times, which indeed it has.
I will have to take prophylactic antibiotics every time I visit a dentist or have even minor surgery for the rest of my life as I still have a Ti-rod and screws in the old right leg.
Thus if I can find some modicum of relief in a small jar of some non psycho active, green goop, I am willing to give it a go as being a better choice and putting off the surgery for as long as possible.
One minor point that I didn’t mention in my first comment is that these small jars of green goop with triethanol amine salicylate are actually easier to use than a tube of some white paste-like goop of the same type.
The reason?
I can open the small jar, remove the inner protective cover (a feature I also like) with the small tab provided, and just stick my finger in it. Just enough green goop adheres to my finger to make it easy and quick to apply. It is both quicker and less messy than wrestling with some kind of tube. This is not in itself a reason to buy the product, but it is a nice feature, I find.
@Jackinga@lisaviolet I’d advise against hip replacement and go for resurfacing if you are eligible. The amount of bone and especially marrow removed is ghastly. I’m not sure if the donate or somehow utilize the marrow, but it is a precious commodity and rightly so as long bones produce new blood cells in the marrow.
I really wish people were presented with more info and given the chance for informed consent on this.
If you do end up with hip replacement, I strongly recommend anterior replacement. Much less pain, and much faster recovery. I had mine done about 18 months ago. They did it outpatient, I was walking and climbing stairs that day, and I was pretty much back to normal in two weeks. Walking 3-4 miles every morning in four weeks. Best choice I have made. Buying this for all the other aches and pains that age is bringing me.
Does the fact that it contains “Double Hemp*” mean using it will put you on “Double Secret Probation?”
Oh, and this contains no CBD- any efficacy whatsoever is due to the trolamine salicylate and the mechanical action of rubbing the painful area. Rated “Four Snakes” on the RonPopeilOmeter…
Several commenters have stated that the hemp seed oil won’t do anything because it doesn’t contain CBD. This made me curious, so I checked to see what non-meh people had to say about the pain relieving properties of hemp seed oil. This is what I found on WebMD: “Hemp seed oil’s anti-inflammatory properties help to reduce pain. You can apply hemp seed oil directly to the painful area for natural pain relief.” Here’s the link: https://www.webmd.com/diet/health-benefits-hemp-seed-oil#:~:text=Hemp seed oil’s anti-inflammatory,area for natural pain relief.
I’ve found that rapidly striking my knee with the rounded bottom of the container has greatly eased the pain. Oddly, the pain was not in my knee but instead by shoulder. Now my knee hurts like a son-of-a-beoch!
That is one of the best Meh product commentary’s ever. To the point while defusing reckless rioting and subtly encouraging purchases. May all of Meh learn from it and stop mailing in the product descriptions disguised as pathetic jokes/graphics.
I bought this the first time around and found that I did get relief from my constant bank pain. I decided to go to their website and found that particular product discontinued but found a more powerful product for $40 a bottle. I am continuing to use that one.
It is HempVana Platinum Maximum Pain Relief Cream 4x Cannabis seed extract for adults only. If I knew how to post a picture I could put up the ingredients.
Specs
Product: 4-Pack: Hempvana Maximum Strength Odor Free Pain Relief Cream (4oz Jars)
Model: 14804
Condition: New
What’s Included?
Price Comparison
$79.96 for 4 on Amazon
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Thursday, Dec 11 - Monday, Dec 15
So creamy and dreamy.
@yakkoTDI Just give it up already. Jeez…
@guybrush01 I would ask you why it bothers you as much as it does, but I think the more accurate question is why does it bother you AT ALL? Hell, for all we know, the fact that it DOES bother someone that much might just be strengthening his resolve to continue. But honestly, in the grand scheme of everything, and in all these ‘interesting’ times we’re living in, and the wonders that still exist both in and out of the internet, if he likes being first in the comments, WHO FUCKING CARES? Seriously.
@Doooood @guybrush01 At 21:00 PST I am usually at the computer finishing my coffee and deciding on what music/movie to fall asleep to. I check out the new deal (or giant piece of carp) that gets posted at 22:00 MST (Meh Standard Time?). I sometimes comment on said item and that is why I get the first post sometimes at 23:00 CST. If you want to get the first comment just be here at 00:00 EST and try your luck. I am not racing anybody for the top spot so it is yours for the taking.
As for liking the fact that I get the first comment. That is not something I have attached any real feeling to. I don’t feel any different if I get the first comment or the tenth. I get more from the funny comments and fun conversations that arise in the comment section. That and the cat pictures.
I do enjoy harassing the occasional person that posts 1 letter and edits it later just so they can get the first post.
@guybrush01 I do find it really odd that it seems to bother you or anyone else at all.
/giphy Uranus

If it doesn’t smell like Bengay, how do you know it’s working?
Does this creme taste nice on pain relief bagels?
@OnionSoup No, only on basrelief bagels.
Ironic its 4 for $20, as in 420?
@Bayamonprieto77 best comment
Vape OR rub
@jmhsrv Rub it where it hurts for 48 hours, taking time out for meals and sleep.
@jmhsrv @Kerig3
Will this stuff mess up a bong? Asking for a friend.
@jayman007


So if I bury the jar with the lid open, will plants with little jars on their stems leap from the ground?
“FDA listed” does not mean that the FDA has found that it actually does anything. It just means that they know it exists. Hemp is the new snake.
Eh, the fine print on the label admits that it’s using trolamine salicylate as the actual active ingredient, but the large print makes it clear that the snake oil factor is what they’re using as their selling point. That’s the kind of marketing sliminess that even Ron Popeil didn’t sink to.
@werehatrack What is wrong with Snake Oil? I don’t think snakes should be forced to stay rusty.
@phendrick @werehatrack
The problem is that only EVSO has any curative properties. And it must be cold-pressed, but everyone neglects to mention that
Meh…joining the bunch of hemp peddling retail pansies. Who wants to fight me?

@gogrrl Not me, but you should order several jars of pain relief cream if you get many takers.
@algae1221
$20 for a pint of aspercreme?
I’m in.
@alacrity Exactly. Quite a bargain.
I ordered this several days ago from SideDeal (same price) and had it such a short time that I’ve tried it once – used it before bed on my knee (ache from combination of arthritis (I guess) and over-use).
It did seem to make a difference; didn’t think about my knee in the morning until I noticed the jar on my stand.
When using it, there is no immediate warmth like from most analgesic creams (BenGay, IcyHot).
Most negative (besides list price) is that it has a fairly oily feel that does not dissipate at all quickly, even with extensive massaging (slow absorbing). I slept with pajama bottoms on and there was no stain on my sheet.
The product’s odor is very slight (if you stick your nose to it) and not unsavory, so not really objectionable IMO.
I will continue to use it.
I think next time I will try it with a percussion massage gun through a towel and see if that speeds up both the absorption and the effect.
Edit: I forgot to mention: If you get this stuff, be aware that because of its oiliness and slow absorption, a very little goes a long way. A fingertip full would be a good start on a knee.
@phendrick On your knee? Sure. Everyone knows that hemp is grown for joints.
So it looks like the active ingredient is Trolamine Salicylate. Basically a chemical related to aspirin. So it should provide some minor pain relief to aches.
@alose AKA Snake Oil~~~
@alose @bgammill Hemp = Snake, sure enough. The trolamine salicylate is the same stuff that’s in Aspercreme, but the hemp crowd will buy it for the snake, er, hemp seed oil (that’s not even the hemp-derived stuff that has CBD in it) because they know that’s the part that “works”.
@werehatrack lol - hemp is “snake oil”?? I’d love to hand you 3 of theses and see how much you think it’s “snake oil” an hour later when you can barely stand up…
@Pufferfishy These are made with hemp SEED oil, which contains no CBD, and not much of anything except oleates. It’s derived from the wrong part of hemp. The stuff in your jar is not this stuff, and the people who make this crap are depending on people making exactly the same assumption that you did.
@Pufferfishy @werehatrack I believe they recently found a new cannabinoid derived from the shell of the seed. Look up HHC vape and you can find some info on it. It feels exactly like weed, right down to the paranoia. Unlike delta 8 with has never gotten me paranoid.
@werehatrack What “assumption” did I make here?? That you literally typed “Hemp = snake”???
I am absolutely well aware that this cream is garbage - but that’s not even remotely what you said.
Hemp oil contains CBD.
Hemp SEED oil (what this product contains) has virtually ZERO CBD in it. What you’re buying here is a weak, off-brand Aspercreme.
If you want non-THC cannabinoid products, always check if it has hemp oil (from the plant) and has CBD, or hemp seed oil, which is just overpriced vegetable oil lacking CBD.
@mbimeh It is the same strength as Aspercreme. It just has Hemp Seed oil instead of aloe. Hemp Seed Oil should work fine as a moisturizer.
For those of you who are attempting to be a cereal killer from yesterday’s deal. Well you just might want to consider buying this. You could place a bit of it on your sore anus.
I have been suffering from a pain in my right hip for many months. When I stand from sitting, the pain is intense as I start to move, but lessens as I continue to move. I cannot sleep on my right side owing to pain in that area. Naproxen sodium and Aspercreme, Ben Gay, etc. help. Owing to Covid,
I haven’t seen a doctor about this lately, but I have had to have steroid and lidocaine injected into that hip joint in the past, and I do have osteoarthritis in the joint. So that was another reason for not rushing out to an orthopedist.
On a lark, I tried the Hempvana the last time it was offered, thinking what the hey, it can’t hurt any more than I am already hurting.
I didn’t put much stock in the hemp oil content, but recognized that the active ingredient is triethanol salicylate aka Trolamine salicylate.
I did note that the label listed hemp seed oil and not cannibidiol or CBD. Therefore I did not figure since it wasn’t described on the label that there was much, if any CBD, in the concoction. Hence the name and the hemp seed oil in the formulation are just a marketing gimmick and perhaps has more of a placebo value than any real therapeutic effect.
It is a pale green, thin creme, which has little to no odor. It is non staining. It is easy to apply and dries quickly on the skin.
I have had quite a bit of benefit from daily use of the creme once or twice a day. My pain, while not gone, is greatly lessened.
To be sure, I could probably have done about as well with one of the other commercial odorless cremes which contain neither menthol nor methyl salicylate (oil of wintergreen) but are also based on triethanol amine salicylate. For some reason, I have been more regular in my use of the Hempvana creme.
Because my pain is in my hip, it is an additional bother to have to drop one’s drawers to apply it. Perhaps most of the reason that I am getting more out of the Hempvana is because I put a jar of it in the bathroom!
YMMV.
@Jackinga I appreciate this honest review.
@Jackinga You just sold me.

/giphy fruity-unwilling-goat
@Jackinga A word about your hip pain…
I had a horrible pain down the inside of my right leg for about a year, thinking it was groin or something, just a pulled muscle. The leg would just give out, go limp noodle on me, at times. I quit driving because of it, it would take me a good three or four minutes to even get in the passenger seat in the car.
Finally went to the doc. He shook his head, sent me down to x-ray. My hip joint was bone on bone. The cartilage was gone. (I seriously had a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that a bad hip was causing the pain on the inside of my leg.) Meds, physical therapy, nothing was going to fix it except surgery.
I was in pain for over two years. Surgery took care of the problem.
One of the reasons I waited for as long as I did after diagnosis was I wanted Medicare to kick in.
The surgery was outpatient (I was in and out that same day) and cost us $250. With our insurance it would have been $6500.
Just sayin’.
@lisaviolet Thanks for the story.
I well understand that a hip replacement could be in my future. However, I prefer to put off that as long as possible. I have had too many friends and family, including my late younger sister, who have had either hip or knee replacements end up with bone infections at the surgery site. And I have been down that road as well.
I broke my right tibia and fibula seven years ago early one morning late at night by slipping on a wet front step. Long story, but I ended up with a metal rod in my tibia and a plate on the fibula along with a lot of bone screws – tastefully arranged, of course, along my leg, top and bottom, by drilling straight through the skin into the bone and hardware.
Nine months after the fall and the metal work repair, I got an infection in the fibula area at one of the screw sites.
Three operations, one more infection in the upper tibia area (another screw site again, but a different cootie), and two peripherally inserted central catheters (PICC line ports) and two 42-day continuous pumped infusions of antibiotics (total of 2.4 lbs of infused, very $$$$ wonder drugs) and sixty days of oral antibiotics later, I am well on my way to being passively bionic or at least more titanium-rich in terms of body mass than the average bear.
I don’t glow in the dark as yet, but I do set off the metal detectors in every security check point without fail. And my lower right leg looks like it has seen some rough times, which indeed it has.
I will have to take prophylactic antibiotics every time I visit a dentist or have even minor surgery for the rest of my life as I still have a Ti-rod and screws in the old right leg.
Thus if I can find some modicum of relief in a small jar of some non psycho active, green goop, I am willing to give it a go as being a better choice and putting off the surgery for as long as possible.
One minor point that I didn’t mention in my first comment is that these small jars of green goop with triethanol amine salicylate are actually easier to use than a tube of some white paste-like goop of the same type.
The reason?
I can open the small jar, remove the inner protective cover (a feature I also like) with the small tab provided, and just stick my finger in it. Just enough green goop adheres to my finger to make it easy and quick to apply. It is both quicker and less messy than wrestling with some kind of tube. This is not in itself a reason to buy the product, but it is a nice feature, I find.
@Jackinga How awful!
I haven’t broken any bones as an adult (broken back when I was a teen, drunk driver broadsided our car).
I did order some of this for my husband. He has a fair amount of body pain, his work is pretty physical. Glad to know it helped you.
@Jackinga @lisaviolet I’d advise against hip replacement and go for resurfacing if you are eligible. The amount of bone and especially marrow removed is ghastly. I’m not sure if the donate or somehow utilize the marrow, but it is a precious commodity and rightly so as long bones produce new blood cells in the marrow.
I really wish people were presented with more info and given the chance for informed consent on this.
@Jackinga @lisaviolet
If you do end up with hip replacement, I strongly recommend anterior replacement. Much less pain, and much faster recovery. I had mine done about 18 months ago. They did it outpatient, I was walking and climbing stairs that day, and I was pretty much back to normal in two weeks. Walking 3-4 miles every morning in four weeks. Best choice I have made. Buying this for all the other aches and pains that age is bringing me.
@Springbank I had mine three years ago.
Hey, neato. A Phish reference in the writeup. Saw them around 25x in the early 90s and once in 2014.
God-Damned Hippies! Go take a bath…
Does the fact that it contains “Double Hemp*” mean using it will put you on “Double Secret Probation?”
Oh, and this contains no CBD- any efficacy whatsoever is due to the trolamine salicylate and the mechanical action of rubbing the painful area. Rated “Four Snakes” on the RonPopeilOmeter…
Several commenters have stated that the hemp seed oil won’t do anything because it doesn’t contain CBD. This made me curious, so I checked to see what non-meh people had to say about the pain relieving properties of hemp seed oil. This is what I found on WebMD: “Hemp seed oil’s anti-inflammatory properties help to reduce pain. You can apply hemp seed oil directly to the painful area for natural pain relief.” Here’s the link: https://www.webmd.com/diet/health-benefits-hemp-seed-oil#:~:text=Hemp seed oil’s anti-inflammatory,area for natural pain relief.
I’ve found that rapidly striking my knee with the rounded bottom of the container has greatly eased the pain. Oddly, the pain was not in my knee but instead by shoulder. Now my knee hurts like a son-of-a-beoch!
That is one of the best Meh product commentary’s ever. To the point while defusing reckless rioting and subtly encouraging purchases. May all of Meh learn from it and stop mailing in the product descriptions disguised as pathetic jokes/graphics.
I bought this the first time around and found that I did get relief from my constant bank pain. I decided to go to their website and found that particular product discontinued but found a more powerful product for $40 a bottle. I am continuing to use that one.
It is HempVana Platinum Maximum Pain Relief Cream 4x Cannabis seed extract for adults only. If I knew how to post a picture I could put up the ingredients.
@dlcarson buying a hemp cream at $40/bottle would cause me bank pain.
@gdorn trust me, I have $40 back pain but your pun was very cute.
Expires June 2022
Any chance of a reorder at the same price?