Shark Rocket Powerhead Vacuum (Refurbished)

  • Light but strong, powerful but agile, like an Olympic gymnast: 9 pounds of raw cleaning fury
  • 2 speed settings, good for either carpet or hardwood floors, got rave reviews at almost twice this price
  • Just don’t buy it as a gift, unless your special someone is a vacuum-cleaner collector
  • Model: AH400 (CHEERS to being able to pronounce this model number “ah, four hundred.” JEERS to the Google results being owned by an unrelated space heater.)
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Great spring cleaning plan. Terrible Valentine's Day plan.

So you’re thinking about getting this Shark Rocket Powerhead Vacuum to help out with spring cleaning. Great idea!

It strikes a great balance between strength and dexterity. As the Amazon reviews attest, it’s plenty powerful enough to be your go-to vacuum for regular cleaning.

But at just nine pounds, it’s so easy to handle you won’t mind grabbing it on a whim to suck up some impromptu mess - unlike those behemoth Dyson-type vacs, which are just as likely to “collect dust” by sitting there, because they’re too much hassle to struggle with. It’s also a snap to flip open the brushroll chamber to take out the brush for cleaning.

The Shark Rocket Powerhead is the perfect little household helper, this springtime or anytime!

So you’re thinking about getting this Shark Rocket Powerhead Vacuum to give as a Valentine’s Day gift. Just stop it.

Right now. Knock it off. Awful, terrible, no-good, very bad idea. As countless, clueless chumps will attest, giving a vacuum as a gift is plenty insulting enough to torpedo the last remaining feelings this person has for you.

But you’re still thinking about it. Are you out of your mind? Are you out of your fucking mind? Whatever little story you’re telling yourself about why this might be a good idea, why your significant other would appreciate you making it easier for them to clean up your filth on the most romantic holiday of the year, is bullshit. It’s bullshit. Just no.

The Shark Rocket Powerhead is a perfectly lethal relationship killer, this Valentine’s Day or any day!

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