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M Cushion 18" Heated Shiatsu Massage Pillow with Bonus Decor Pillow
- You get a massage pillow that goes hard on your back, and a bonus decor pillow that’s easy on the eyes.
- It’ll give you a Shiatsu massage, or a Shi-hot-su massage if you use the heat function.
- Features “Bi-directional massage nodes,” which I’m sure we all understand and thus don’t need to discuss any further.
- Model: PRM7PLS, cuz it is Primed to please… with a 7 in there as filler.
An Apology
Dearest Meh Customers,
Apparently, our minds cannot be trusted, and for that we are sorry.
You see, in our previous attempt to sell these M Cushions, we misinterpreted a few things. By which we mean, we mistook several vague comments about the massager being applied to unnamed areas beyond the back to mean…
Hmmm…
How do we say it exactly?
Let’s try this: we thought you were implying that the M Cushion could be applied to places where the combination of friction and heat might bring about sensations not unrelated to relief, but a step beyond relief, a sort of deep relief that goes by many names, one of which it shares with a term from film and literature meaning the culmination of the story’s drama.
But, um… apparently we were a little off-base. As one quoted commenter noted:
I swear I didn’t mean it in a sexual way. I just meant after leg day you can lean back in bed and use it on your aching thighs rather comfortably.
So, we apologize to you, commenters who we misunderstood. And moreover, we apologize also to all out there who purchased the M Cushion hoping for that aforementioned special sense of relief and, instead, received what seems to be a pretty good, if not aggressive, massage pillow and little else.
Thus, we promise not to make the same mistake again. We will heretofore not only market the M Cushion 18" Heated Shiatsu Massage Pillow in a straightforward manner; we also vow never to purposefully misinterpret anything said on our forums as sexual innuendo… unless it’s, like, really funny to do so.
Sincerely,
Meh