We've Created A Monster

Anyone else getting tired of the same old monsters. Dracula? More like Drab-ula! Zombies? A bunch of real zom-bozos! Werewolves? Get-the-hell-outta-here, wolves! Enough with the masked killers using gardening implements, with the typical ghosts and ghouls, and enough with the clowns! No, it’s about time we forge a bold new direction in horror. I’ve even roped in our own resident monster-sculptor @KoolHandJoe for his expert opinions on the matter. Let’s see what we’ve got.

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You know how there are millions of algorithmically-generated children’s videos on YouTube that are just complete nonsense? These sort of insane piecemeal slurries of pop culture characters playing out trite, cookie-cutter stories? Some begin appearing featuring public figures. They are the same stories as before. For a time, at least. They start to shift. While pregnant Elsa has a picnic with Spider-Man, a firetruck hits a celebrity in the background. A few days later, it happens in reality. More incidents occur, but nobody seems to notice. Then, looking over the shoulder of a child on the bus in front of you, you can clearly see yourself in the background of yet another finger family variant, and you can not look away.