Flying Fisherman Master Angler Polycarbonate Sunglasses
- Polarized polycarbonate lenses are almost as distortion-free as glass, but a lot more durable (and less expensive)
- Floating retainer is like a life vest for your glasses
- 100% protection from UVA and UVB rays (no, those aren’t the rays that give you super powers)
- Despite the “Flying Fisherman” brand name, they’re not just for fisherman or people who can fly
You can lead me to sunglasses, but you can't make me fish.
So let me get this straight: Flying Fisherman markets these as fishing sunglasses. What? Why? Are they smeared with carp pheromones?
Nah. Not buying it. And by that, I mean I am buying these sunglasses. Even though I’ve never drowned so much as worm one. And there’s not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me.
What’s that you say? The polarized, AcuTint lenses are optimal for reducing glare off the surface of the water, without distorting vision? Hey, let me tell you, all the glass buildings at my office park can throw some pretty harsh twinkles.
And the floating band keeps them from sinking if they fall in the water? Well, sometimes I have to park over by the water feature. It’s at least conceivable I could drop them in. And that thing is, like, two, three feet deep. Reaching down to the bottom would get my whole arm wet.
Hey, look, I can understand fishermen wanting some kind of reward, some kind of consolation. If I’d wasted countless hours fruitlessly wiggling a string in the water, I’d also cling to any validation that there was some meaning behind it.
Maybe after yet another day of voluntary paralysis on the lake, I’d also look at the specs of these low-distortion, high-durability sunglasses, in the middle column below, and tell myself “I’ll always have polarized polycarbonate”:
<img src=“https://res.cloudinary.com/mediocre/image/upload/v1445524653/vsy65hww1kic4o55hx8v.png”>
But I’m happily free of any fishing impulses, so quit bogarting the good stuff, fishermen. I’m buying these because I refuse to choose between catching crappie and crappy sunglasses.
