Cuisinart T10 Touchscreen Burr Coffee Grinder
- Pre-ground beans are old as hell! Don’t buy them!
- Can hold up to a half-pound of beans at a time
- 18 grind settings (or, 19, if you count opening the top and scooping up a handful of beans whole)
- Is it available in Georgia Red: No, it comes in “is that thing a smart speaker?” black
Rise & Grind
I’d bean meaning to improve my coffee-brewing techniques ever since my divorce from my chemist wife (I call her my chem-ex, now). Her disdain for me had long percolated but it was when I purchased a bag of pre-ground beans that she really espressed her frustration.
When she said, “You’re lazy and settle for mediocre java,” that was like a shot straight to my heart. And when she said, “Also, I don’t like your sense of style,” it was like a double shot.
So I decided to start doing some research into grinders. I consulted with a number of reporters who cover airplane news and a number of reporters stationed in Paris–the aero-press and the French press, respectively–but they provided little insight into the matter.
It was up to me, I realized. I would have to make the final decision. And to do so, I would have to work day and nitro.
Only, I couldn’t go it alone. I could not live within a vacuum. So I called my friend, Litta, a very talented artist who recreates Jackson Pollock paintings. She can really churn them out, too, a regular drip machine!
She came over and immediately turned on the television. First, she watched all of Snatch–she loves Jason Statham as Turkish–and then she switched over to Comedy Central where Jeffrey Ross and the rest of the New York Friars Club were hurling off-color barbs at Al Pacino, Joe Pesci, and Sophia Loren–an Italian roast if I ever saw one!
Litta tried to change the channel again, but I snatched the remote away from her and reminded her that she came over to help find a good coffee grinder.
“For who?” she said.
“Me, Litta!” I exclaimed. “For me!”
“Well, in that case, you should buy the one for sale on Meh today. It’s a sleek Cuisinart Burr grinder with an intuitive touch screen and an 18-position Grind Selector.”
So that’s what I did! And now, I’m called “Mr. Coffee” whenever I walk the streets of my neighborhood in Queens, New York, which is the neighborhood of Hamilton Beach.
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