CRKT Thero EDC Carbon Fiber Folding Pocket Knife
- The black oxide finish won’t rust
- Seriously sharp and seriously lightweight
- Great for doing super cool tough stuff (like breaking down Amazon boxes)
- Can it make a margarita: If you’ve never had a knife-blended marg, you haven’t lived
Repurposed Copy
“When the ground trembles, you know it’s coming,” I told my wife while showing her the new knife I bought from the same website where I’d recently picked up more than fifty low-sugar imitation Snickers bars.
“The Thero everyday carry may be supremely thin and lightweight but it’s got the bite of a prehistoric carnivore. A skeletal handle looks like an ancient t-rex and will help maintain a solid grip when up against everything from a greasy gasket to a wooly mammoth,” I said to a neighbor, standing on my front porch, using the knife to open an Amazon box containing probiotic gummies I’d read online can increase gut health in men who start to experience gastrointestinal distress on a more frequent basis in their late thirties.
“TJ Schwarz is known for high aesthetics that don’t budge on utility. Designed in his Boise, Idaho shop, the Thero is definitive proof. Named after a group of ‘beast-footed’ dinosaurs called theropods, this everyday carry has the look of a museum relic and an aggressive, lightweight design that’s all 21st century,” I told my daughter as I used the blade to cut all the zip ties adhering her Fisher Price Little People organic food co-op playset to its packaging.
“The high-carbon, stainless steel modified sheepsfoot blade features a black oxide finish that’s tough against wear and rust. It’s balanced by a glass-reinforced nylon handle with a carbon fiber underlay for aesthetic and toughness. The blade opens quickly with either a flipper or a thumb hole and is held solidly in place with a locking liner,” I mumbled to myself while cutting up the tulip festival volunteer T-shirt that no longer fit so I could use its pieces as rags to clean my crafting table in the basement.
“An ancient artifact meets the future in the Thero,” I called out as I cut kitchen twine to wrap a roast beef, the recipe for which I’d gotten from The Barefoot Contessa.
