4-Pack: Paradise Low Voltage Outdoor Integrated LED Landscape Floodlights

  • Just because it gets dark doesn’t mean your garden has to disappear
  • With an aluminum coating, these things are built to stand up to the elements
  • Stick them in the ground, turn the swivel head, and you’re golden
  • How does this help me celebrate National Wine Day: It doesn’t, so you should head over to Casemates
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Shed Some Light

Today we’ve got a 4-pack of outdoor lights great for highlighting the various unique features of your home or garden at night. Like, just take a look at the way I have them set up in my backyard! Aren’t they nice?

And you don’t need to worry about using too much power either. Because these are super low voltage. We’re talking just 12 volts to achieve 350 lumens of soft light. But don’t worry, they’re built to la–

Oh, sorry, was there a question?

Yes, you’re correct: I do have all four of mine shining on the same granite statue in my garden.

Anyway, where were we? Right! Their durability! These things are built to last, thanks to a sturdy aluminum coating! And you know what else–

Another question?

Why, yes. The sculpture is me. Although I wouldn’t go as far as to the ‘me’ in the sculpture is ‘way more muscular’ than me in real life. That version of me likely just looks more muscular because all of his muscles are flexed to fight that bear.

But what I was about to say, getting back to the light set, is that they’re very easy to install. You just spike them into the ground and then adjust the swivel head to face whatever you want. And at this price, you’d be silly not to–

Fine. One more question.

Yes, the bear is holding a laptop. If you look closely, you’ll see the sculptor etched the screen to show that he’s conducting a phishing scam. And yes, he’s able to power that laptop with a car battery that says ‘property of the United States postal service.’ I really just wanted it to be clear that I’m not someone who would wander into the woods and start fighting some random bear. No way, I love animals, and so one would have to be pretty nefarious to feel the extent of my wrath.

Sorry. Got a bit off-topic there. Point is: this is an excellent set of lights for highlighting architectural and/or garden features at night, and we’re selling them for way cheaper than you can find elsewhere. So buy them!

Ugh. Look at the time. I better get going. I gotta go sit for my sculptor for a new statue. And first I gotta throw my muscle suit in the washing machi–err, I mean, lift a bunch of weights to get super swole.

So far today...

  • 64824 of you visited.
  • 45% on a phone, 2% on a tablet.
  • 3611 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 835 of these.
  • Deal ended .
  • That’s $27720 total.
  • (including shipping)

Who's buying this crap?

How many are you buying?