Popping Back Up

Yesterday, @Mediocrebot took over Meh, offering a Mehrathon of epic proportions! Or at least slightly above average proportions. Or maybe the proportions were what you’d expect. Honestly, I was just happy to get the day off from my copywriting duties. I can’t really speak to the proportions, epic or otherwise, of yesterday’s Mehrathon.

And besides, that’s not what’s important. After a day under bot control, I want to reassert us as a human-run ecommerce experience. Which is why we’re selling these Meh Pop Sockets; because we are good people with hearts and minds that are capable of things like humility and empathy.

Here’s what happened: these were set to sell at Midnight last night, but due to some technical difficulties, they were basically impossible to buy. This might’ve seemed like a very cruel April Fools joke, but we assure, it was actually just a tech hiccup.

The issue is, we couldn’t just slide them into another slot on the Mehrathon schedule because we weren’t in charge; Mediocrebot was. And Mediocrebot, as a bot, couldn’t possibly understand why anyone would want these goofy little things in the first place.

Moreover, it would be unthinkable for Mediocrebot to admit something was a computer error. I mean that literally: he has programmed the concept of computer errors out of his knowledge base and, in his internal dictionary, has set the phrase ‘computer error’ to be defined as ‘a chutney involving jalapeños.’

Thus, we’ve decided to correct this little mishap by offering them today!

And I’ll be honest: it’s also a nice, simple sale that’ll give the devs plenty of time to undo some of the more complicated changes Mediocrebot made on the backend of our site. Like, the sequence he set in motion to transition us to a 100% 3D-printer-based delivery system by 2021. And then there’s some operation that has to do with porting users’ minds directly into the forum by 2030, and something about the eradication of ‘the vile joke known as physical space’ by 2035. We’re not entirely sure we can reverse those two.

But we definitely hope you’ll enjoy these Pop Sockets!