2-for-Tuesday: Remington Lockback Knives
- Basically just a couple of pocketknives, emphasis on the “basic”
- 4-7/8" open, 2-3/4" closed, 1-13/16" blade, fits all but the tiniest pockets
- Blade is made of 440 Stainless Steel: 440, 441, whatever it takes
- Get it with or without “designer holes” (Remington’s words, not ours)
- Model: R11507, R18043 (the only difference is the holes in the handle, but the model numbers are different in four of the six characters, and consecutively 6,536 apart - what? why?)
The Expectations Game
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. - Alexander Pope
Here we have some knives. We’re no experts, but they’re among the most basic, starter-level, lowercase-m meh knives we’ve ever sold. Pretty small, too: the blade is just 1-13/16" long. And yet, they have one of the highest Amazon ratings of any knives we’ve ever sold: 4.3 stars out of 5.
The key: proper expectations.
Did you ever have a pocketknife when you were a kid? You didn’t know anything about thumb screws, or opening mechanisms, or varieties of steel. You just knew you had a little blade in your pocket when you needed it. Then, when the moment came to cut some fishing line or open a package, your pocketknife did the job. And you were happy.
We’re not telling you to give this knife to a kid. We’re telling you to enjoy it like one.
Properly managed expectations are our business. We give you the gory details, set a suitable price, and the rest is up to you. No give-backs after you buy unless it’s, like, broken or something. These knives were cheap even before we got ahold of them. Now they’re almost as close to free as manufactured objects can get. Those Amazon reviewers - and presumably the mute masses who also own this knife but have not posted a review - knew exactly what to expect from a cheap little knife. This Remington knife lived up to that bargain. That’s all it takes.
Setting the right expectations is the key to more than just knife happiness. That lake an hour or two away might be lovely, but you’re not going to enjoy your vacation there if you’re expecting Cancun. That hole-in-the-wall burrito place kicks delicious ass on its own terms, but you won’t taste the magic if you’re fixated on how it falls short of haute cuisine. You probably clean up real good when you try, so why beat yourself up because you weren’t born a fashion model?
Want to have an unhappy marriage? Go into it expecting the only friction to be the good kind in the bedroom. Enjoy despairing about the state of the world? Compare the imperfect reality around you to a vision of Utopia. Hoping to feel bad about yourself? Decide right now that the only definition of success is to achieve your most far-fetched dreams: playing for the Chicago Bulls, getting a sculpture into the permanent collection at MoMA, being a billionaire.
If you understand what to expect from this pair of three-dollar knives, they’ll be one of the most satisfying impulse buys you’ve ever made. If not, well, as we said, no give-backs.