Ethical Grey Area

Valentine’s Day is coming. And this time of year, we like to think about one of the most honored and time-tested foundations of meaningful romantic connections—deceit.

But before you get all high and mighty on us with your blah-blah-trust and your yada-yada-communication, we just want to point out that deceit is a spectrum.

On one side of that spectrum, you have the little white lies. We’re talking about “Of course I don’t mind meeting your parents for dinner after my really long day at work” or “There’s no way anybody at the office noticed your horribly uneven beard trim today.” On the other end of the spectrum you’ve got your extramarital affairs, hidden gambling debts, and starting a secret free trial of the streaming service you already have so that you can sneak the next few episodes of the show you’ve been enjoying together without being foiled by your watch history. You know, the serious stuff.

As for today’s deal? Also a spectrum. Could you grab this fake diamond necklace with fake matching earrings and give it to your beloved without mentioning that you picked them up from a website that also sells semi-expired ramen noodles and the occasional $50 bag of actual trash? Sure you could. A lie by omission at worst. Even if they happen to notice the credit card statement, there’s no way they’re going to see a thirteen-dollar charge and immediately assume “my jewelry!”

But you didn’t come here for the little white lie end of the spectrum. You came for the end of the spectrum more aligned with spending forty minutes tossing the furniture helping your loved one look for the KitKat you ate this morning.

So we’re just going to say it.

You could spend thirteen dollars on today’s deal and try to pass it off as real diamond jewelry on Valentine’s Day. We’re talking high-risk, high-reward territory here. Will she fall for it? Maybe! Honestly, we sell this shit and would be hard-pressed to tell the difference between the real thing and cubic zirconias, or, as the cool kids call them, cubie Zs. (Editor’s Note: The cool kids do NOT call them cubie Zs.)

Anyway, is that level of romantic deceit a good idea? Of course not. Do we think any of you deal-hungry savages will actually do it? Probably a few. Do we endorse that? No comment.

But we’re not expecting many of you guys to actually push this all the way to the “actually evil” end of the spectrum. It’s just that there could still be a little room to get away with a little something is all we’re saying. Maybe you’ve got a really thoughtful handmade gift in mind and you want a Plan B in your back pocket if it lands a little flat and you need to call in some sparkly reinforcements. This is perfect.

Or perhaps you’ve got terrible luck and managed to stumble into an otherwise casual relationship three weeks before Valentine’s Day and need to thread that particular needle just right. This could do that.

Or you just spent like eight grand on the genuine version of this exact design and you’re looking for something to look good on TikTok while the real deal sits in a safe between stacks of hundred-dollar bills and that giant blue diamond from Titanic. Feels like a stretch, but yeah…this’d work.

So to reiterate, these aren’t real diamonds. But they are real pretty.

Proceed with caution.