@zerth had to wiki lookup (btw, have to use “piezoelectricity”): It is also the basis of a number of scientific instrumental techniques with atomic resolution, the scanning probe microscopies, … and everyday uses, such as acting as the ignition source for cigarette lighters, and push-start propane barbecues, as well as the time reference source in quartz watches.
I am fine with scanning microscopes but do they have to probe too?
Using a screw pump to move water, especially a transparent one, is an amazing thing. It makes me feel like some sort of wizard. Once again, Archimedes makes my life a little bit more enjoyable.
The siphon. I’m thrilled each spring when I use one to empty huge pools of snow melt off the lawn down into the river. It’s magic. I hope I’m done siphoning for this year.
In the same vein as the piezo transducer, I say the galvanometer. Simple, very cool, useful in all kinds of applications from film cameras to lasers to EKGs to polygraphs. More electro-y simple machines please!
@pburkej
Give, nothing. The construction industry does not “give” the items you request under any circumstances.
The bill for your proposal is:
$999999999999999999999999999999999999999.99
plus tax.
In March 06, 2017 dollars.
If the contractee pays late, the invoice will be recalculated according to inflation, and according to the personal indulgence expense list of the contractor at that time.
This invoice must be paid, the funds cleared, and after that at least 777777777777777777777777777777777777 years must pass at minimum before construction of said lever and said place to stand will begin. No date of completion will be offered or estimated at any point during the duration of the contract.
This invoice does not include the cost of a fulcrum, nor a place to put the fulcrum. Those costs are extra.
This invoice does not include moving the contractee to the site of the place to stand, or insuring survival of said contractee during travel or upon arrival. This invoice does not include installation of the lever. The contractee is responsible for those expenses.
The contractee is responsible for all legal, medical, and life-support costs, including any legal problems associated with the usage or a lever, or the effects caused by such usage. The contractee is responsible for dealing militarily or diplomatically or both with any resulting wars or climate changes.
The contractee is being observed by the NSA from this instant until completion of all construction, installation, travel, and lever usage.
The contractor is not responsible for the actions of any other organization(s), individual(s), or government(s), or deity(ies), acting separately or in concert with regard to this project. The contractor is not responsible for the possibility of the contractee and his/her heirs aging out and dying.
The contractee is assumed to have agreed to all the fine print. The final copy of the fine print will be conveyed to the contractee at some point after lever usage.
@f00l I’ll tell you what, I’ll get me a lever heavy enough, and a firm place to grip it, a few kneecaps to “massage” and I am sure I can “encourage” you to see things my way, and make this happen no problem…capisce?
Easily the flexible putty knife. I don’t know why, but I love filling holes in walls.
/giphy that sounds dirty
@hems79 don’t fix the glory holes!
@ThatsHeadly I went to Corning, NY about 10 years ago, and one of the pubs we passed was “The Glory Hole.”
/giphy Not Google Imaging That at Work
@hems79
Went into a glory hole once.
This one.
Chunks of pyrite all over the place.
piezo transducer, electricity into linear motion and vice versa.
@zerth had to wiki lookup (btw, have to use “piezoelectricity”): It is also the basis of a number of scientific instrumental techniques with atomic resolution, the scanning probe microscopies, … and everyday uses, such as acting as the ignition source for cigarette lighters, and push-start propane barbecues, as well as the time reference source in quartz watches.
I am fine with scanning microscopes but do they have to probe too?
An inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis.
@ThatsHeadly (hehehehehe)
Magnets aren’t machines, but who cares, I’ll say magnets.
/giphy magnets
@awk Magnetic Putty
@awk Oh boy I love me some magnets! I just got a stereo headset and I know for a fact that they’re made by a magnet-happy company. Makes my day.
@Raider tried giving you ten stars for this but couldn’t. It’s like, ok, nah, ok, nah…; like a simple on-off machine is built into this keyboard.
Using a screw pump to move water, especially a transparent one, is an amazing thing. It makes me feel like some sort of wizard. Once again, Archimedes makes my life a little bit more enjoyable.
Me.
Mushroom fluter.
Pulley, simply because without one I’d have to walk up 10 floors worth of stsirs at work.
Damit… stairs.
The siphon. I’m thrilled each spring when I use one to empty huge pools of snow melt off the lawn down into the river. It’s magic. I hope I’m done siphoning for this year.
@sligett yeah, good one! it’s like capillarity in motion
I like a backhoe. It’s kind of simple, really, just turn the key and step on the gas… a real back saver.
P38 can opener because it is the only machine you need to survive.
In the same vein as the piezo transducer, I say the galvanometer. Simple, very cool, useful in all kinds of applications from film cameras to lasers to EKGs to polygraphs. More electro-y simple machines please!
Speaker Dock!
/giphy drop mic
Bottle opener
cuz beer, duh
My brain…
@mikibell
I don’t have one.
@f00l if you had one…
@mikibell
Keep an eye out for mine, willya? Just let your eye roll around on the floor looking for it.
PS it’s really really small ,
/giphy eyeroll
@mikibell I’ll remember that
Damn, there’s no word for remember with less word parts.
@cranky1950 you make me smile…aren’t you supposed to be cranky?
The Fork.
/giphy rube goldberg machine
@narfcake somehow, this reminds me of the old MOUSETRAP game…
Give me a lever, and a firm spot on which to stand, and I shall move the earth!
@pburkej
Give, nothing. The construction industry does not “give” the items you request under any circumstances.
The bill for your proposal is:
$999999999999999999999999999999999999999.99
plus tax.
In March 06, 2017 dollars.
If the contractee pays late, the invoice will be recalculated according to inflation, and according to the personal indulgence expense list of the contractor at that time.
This invoice must be paid, the funds cleared, and after that at least 777777777777777777777777777777777777 years must pass at minimum before construction of said lever and said place to stand will begin. No date of completion will be offered or estimated at any point during the duration of the contract.
This invoice does not include the cost of a fulcrum, nor a place to put the fulcrum. Those costs are extra.
This invoice does not include moving the contractee to the site of the place to stand, or insuring survival of said contractee during travel or upon arrival. This invoice does not include installation of the lever. The contractee is responsible for those expenses.
The contractee is responsible for all legal, medical, and life-support costs, including any legal problems associated with the usage or a lever, or the effects caused by such usage. The contractee is responsible for dealing militarily or diplomatically or both with any resulting wars or climate changes.
The contractee is being observed by the NSA from this instant until completion of all construction, installation, travel, and lever usage.
The contractor is not responsible for the actions of any other organization(s), individual(s), or government(s), or deity(ies), acting separately or in concert with regard to this project. The contractor is not responsible for the possibility of the contractee and his/her heirs aging out and dying.
The contractee is assumed to have agreed to all the fine print. The final copy of the fine print will be conveyed to the contractee at some point after lever usage.
@pburkej You move earth with an idiot stick.
@f00l I’ll tell you what, I’ll get me a lever heavy enough, and a firm place to grip it, a few kneecaps to “massage” and I am sure I can “encourage” you to see things my way, and make this happen no problem…capisce?
@pburkej
I’m your boss. This is just another line of business I’m in.
Wanna come in and discuss this deal? After all, it’s a family thing.
Capisce?
Have a nice day.
@cranky1950 I move many things with my Burke bar.
Your not my boss. You don’t have the leverage. Fu…lcrums are handy for that type of thing
@pburkej
Uh huh. See you soon.
Ok doke.