@Barney - Well, I finally got a “K” badge on Casemates, so figured I didn’t need the fake one anymore. Tried to change my name back to demo, but someone else usurped it.
In the end, all I did was lower case myself. You are very observant.
My favorite poem, to go along with one of my favorite videos.
Schroedinger, Erwin! Professor of physics!
Wrote daring equations! Confounded his critics!
(Not bad, eh? Don’t worry. This part of the verse
Starts off pretty good, but it gets a lot worse.)
Win saw that the theory that Newton’d invented
By Einstein’s discov’ries had been badly dented.
What now? wailed his colleagues. Said Erwin, “Don’t panic,
No grease monkey I, but a quantum mechanic.
Consider electrons. Now, these teeny articles
Are sometimes like waves, and then sometimes like particles.
If that’s not confusing, the nuclear dance
Of electrons and suchlike is governed by chance!
No sweat, though — my theory permits us to judge
Where some of ’em is and the rest of ’em was.”
Not everyone bought this. It threatened to wreck
The comforting linkage of cause and effect.
E’en Einstein had doubts, and so Schroedinger tried
To tell him what quantum mechanics implied.
Said Win to Al, “Brother, suppose we’ve a cat,
And inside a tube we have put that cat at —
Along with a solitaire deck and some Fritos,
A bottle of Night Train, a couple mosquitoes
(Or something else rhyming) and, oh, if you got ’em,
One vial prussic acid, one decaying ottom
Or atom — whatever — but when it emits,
A trigger device blasts the vial into bits
Which snuffs our poor kitty. The odds of this crime
Are 50 to 50 per hour each time.
The cylinder’s sealed. The hour’s passed away. Is
Our pussy still purring — or pushing up daisies?
Now, you’d say the cat either lives or it don’t
But quantum mechanics is stubborn and won’t.
Statistically speaking, the cat (goes the joke),
Is half a cat breathing and half a cat croaked.
To some this may seem a ridiculous split,
But quantum mechanics must answer, ‘Tough shit.
We may not know much, but one thing’s fo’ sho’:
There’s things in the cosmos that we cannot know.
Shine light on electrons — you’ll cause them to swerve.
The act of observing disturbs the observed —
Which ruins your test. But then if there’s no testing
To see if a particle’s moving or resting
Why try to conjecture? Pure useless endeavor!
We know probability — certainty, never.’
The effect of this notion? I very much fear
‘Twill make doubtful all things that were formerly clear.
Till soon the cat doctors will say in reports,
“We’ve just flipped a coin and we’ve learned he’s a corpse.”‘
So saith Herr Erwin. Quoth Albert, “You’re nuts.
God doesn’t play dice with the universe, putz.
I’ll prove it!” he said, and the Lord knows he tried —
In vain — until fin’ly he more or less died.
Win spoke at the funeral: “Listen, dear friends,
Sweet Al was my buddy. I must make amends.
Though he doubted my theory, I’ll say of this saint:
Ten-to-one he’s in heaven — but five bucks says he ain’t.”
Cecil Adams
Send questions to Cecil via cecil@straightdope.com.
Just sent that off to The Spouse, who is enamored of both Schroedinger and Adams.
He has four t-shirts that routinely provoke questions from total strangers. The Schroedinger’s shirt (front: Schroedinger’s cat is dead. Back: Schroedinger’s cat is alive.) is currently running in second place.
First place (There’s no place like 127.0.0.1) has been held for a long time. Every now and then someone, usually someone who appears under the age of 25, glances at the shirt, laughs aloud, and says to The Spouse something along the line of “That’s great, man!”
Third place, just in case you wondered, just says “Trophy Husband.”
Don’t put me in the box! DOOOONNNNNNN’T!
That cat is apparently onto the Schrödinger concept.
@kdemo Uh, you look different, what happened?
Um, I got a haircut, do you like it?
@Barney - Well, I finally got a “K” badge on Casemates, so figured I didn’t need the fake one anymore. Tried to change my name back to demo, but someone else usurped it.
In the end, all I did was lower case myself. You are very observant.
@kdemo You just look so different. I guess it’s going to take me a while to get used to your new trim, no caps look.
@Barney - Streamlined for speed.
My favorite poem, to go along with one of my favorite videos.
@mehcuda67 Your favorite poem is really long. My
ADD wouldn’t allow me to finish it. Mine is a haiku.
After weeks of watching the roof leak
I fixed it tonight
by moving a single board
@mehcuda67
+1
Just sent that off to The Spouse, who is enamored of both Schroedinger and Adams.
He has four t-shirts that routinely provoke questions from total strangers. The Schroedinger’s shirt (front: Schroedinger’s cat is dead. Back: Schroedinger’s cat is alive.) is currently running in second place.
First place (There’s no place like 127.0.0.1) has been held for a long time. Every now and then someone, usually someone who appears under the age of 25, glances at the shirt, laughs aloud, and says to The Spouse something along the line of “That’s great, man!”
Third place, just in case you wondered, just says “Trophy Husband.”
@magic_cave
My “Schrödinger’s Cat” is a genuine “Trophy Schrödinger’s Cat”.
Purebred, of long and noble lineage. Breed champion and Best In Show.
/giphy Schrödinger’s Cat
@f00l This year’s Boxie award goes to YOUR cat!