The last of the Seligman?

I'm sorry I missed out on this experiment. I'm quite surprised I'm not part of the first 1000 users that signed up for mediocre.

Hah! Oh, malort...I think I forgot to attach my tasting notes note to the bottle of Malort, Chicago's very own official bar-rat poison. "Malort, Chicago's way of trolling people."
So, a collection of r/chicago reflections on the flavour and mouthfeel of a Malort experience:
- unsweetened grapefruit juice gone bad mixed with some sort of throat-burning well liquor.
- it starts off tasting like a humid basement smells and then finishes with that black dentyne ice flavor.
- Cemetary dirt. That's what it tastes like.
- Wet dog + spoiled grapefruit juice
- like drinking carpet.
- It’s not a roller coaster with ups and downs, it’s straight down... It brings me to an angry, aggressive place. This is not the emotion I’d like to experience every day. I want to be listening to Slayer and Pantera in a wife beater in a really dark place, preferably with no windows.
- It tastes like what hairspray smells
- like licorice receiving anal from a lit match
- It tastes like grief. Like how the sound of bagpipes would taste.
- Tastes like an abortion clinic in iceland
- garbage-water out of a high school lunchroom garbage can. Then after you swallow you get the terrible after taste. It tastes EXACTLY like your mouth tastes after you vomit.
- like pencil shavings with a hint of pine, with an aftertaste of heartbreak.
- tasted like rotten cantaloupe, burnt pubes and stale Captain Crunch.
- like a devils brew of Brut Aftershave, Vicks Nyquil and like a kind of cilantro thing in going on in there
- It's the product of a Gypsy curse