Photoshop Contest: Mediocre Meh Merch
19Want to win literally tens of dollars worth of coupons? Photoshop some great-or-terrible Meh Merchandise and we’ll give the “winner” (as determined by us) a measly $25 coupon. The runner up (as determined by the most stars) will get an even-measlier $10 coupon. Contest ends at noon on December 20th.
Here’s some inspiration to get your creative juices flowing like so many undercooked geese:
- 61 comments, 97 replies
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/define merchandise
NOUN
VERB
There seems to be a demand for these.
Probably the most useful giveaway I’ve received at work has been an insulated grocery bag. It’s been great for both hot and cold items. I’d even be willing to give you guys a few bucks for another.
@cinoclav FTFY:
Sorry for quality, I did this on my phone.
@djslack They actually do keep my items hot or cold.
@cinoclav And you expect the Meh one to do the same?
(I’m not at all contesting how well your bag works. I’m making it more Meh-appropriate.)
@medz We share brains.
@ACraigL GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
@ACraigL @medz I think you must have meant butts if you were going to buy this…
@medz This is double sided, right?
@ecue Yup. Each square has two sides. Just wipe then turn it over to use the other side.
@ecue @medz No, it’s so thin it only has one side.
I’ve officially reached the end of my ability to photshop anything. Especially using pixlr and a crappy mouse. But you get the idea…
@cinoclav You know those realistic-looking pillows? Someone at meh should make a bunch of snapster head pillows and decorate the office.
/image realistic face pillow
@cinoclav
@cinoclav @medz
Can someone do an Irk and Glen pillow?
@jst1ofknd
@jst1ofknd @medz
@cinoclav @medz
The stump of the arm gets 5 stars.
@ACraigL Just now saw the irk face!
@medz Ya! A little Easter egg. It’s subtle.
Confront the day lethargic and indifferent with Mehster Energy Drink! It tastes ok.
@medz Do you just have a folder for this shit or what
@Moose I just randomly choose one from my full wall collage.
Once meh is done suing them into the ground…
@lichme this makes me uncomfortable.
The tongue is the worst part.
@lichme @RiotDemon omg I didnt notice the tongue at first. I just threw up a little in my mouth.
@lichme @tinamarie1974 sorry!
@lichme @RiotDemon all good
@lichme @RiotDemon @tinamarie1974 I wonder what a q-tip would smell like after running in back and forth in that tongue groove…
@lichme @medz @RiotDemon and it is coming up again
/giphy throwing up
Benefits Include
Bonus
@lichme um…how about just incorporating that extended window now?..IE…I missed the damn irk shirt and I WANT ONE
@amehzinggrace You actually missed it twice. Maybe they’ll sell it again in another 3 years.
@lichme yeah…but the extended 24 hour wouldve been effective this recent time…curse weekends…love hate relationship
@amehzinggrace What size are you looking for? I might be able to help you out.
@PurplePawprints a mehdium would be great!
@lichme Enjoy your $10 coupon.
Or maybe
“marginally like sex”
and
“extended tolerance”
@lichme “I’m not just the CEO, I’m also a client.”
@lichme
I would buy this!
@heartny This is excellent! Except it should say: “Own the brands you’ve never heard of before and the products that never really work quite right” and “Includes refurbished brands and tokens”
@ciabelle
Too soon?
I guess I didn’t look closely enough at the above images. I see now that @lichme already covered this
@capguncowboy @lichme more like…too late…
@capguncowboy @lichme I like yours better.
Ok I am not very good at this but here goes
@medz That’s a heck of a good idea. I don’t drink wine so Meh’s wine thing is of no interest to me. But beer?! Yes please.
Crappy Jewelry: $14
Refurbushed Thing-A-Mabob: $48
200 Fidget Spinners: $8
The feeling you get when you’re opening up your I.R.K: Priceless
Some things money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s:
You might like the stuff you get. No guarantees, though.
@medz
You should change it to WAREHOUSE. Slogan is great!
@lichme
@ciabelle
Needed a finishing touch…
@ciabelle
Glen’s “head” on a human body is … highly disturbing.
@ciabelle as of today, this gets my vote! Disturbing, yes, but in an appropriate manner.
@stolicat The best part is, that I didn’t have to change the original tagline… “Yes something happens. Something so very, very wrong!”
Dammit. I’m out. Those bastards (the movers) either hid or stole my graphics tablet and the dongle (heh heh heh heh) to my regular mouse. I can’t photoshop with my trackball. Argh.
I want meh branded cups. Purple ones.
@cengland0 Those used to exist. I received on once in a Fuku. Regrettably, that’s the only piece of crap that I received in any Fuk* or BOC that ever suffered an accidental traumatic demise. The other shit I can’t get rid of no matter what I do (except for that one time I gave away a box of it here…).
@shahnm I got a couple of those cups too and use them daily but they are black on the outside and purple on the inside.
It’s sort of an inside joke about them being purple, people who have been around a long time would understand, but I’d still buy them if they were white, black, red, or blue. No weird colors like orange, yellow, or lime green.
Here’s a cute animated GIF of my bird drinking out of my meh cup.
So in summary, I already have a couple meh cups but would like to buy more.
A collection of meh branded sharpies so we can always have the current item in whatever color we want.
United Mehdical… because we care…about getting home on time.
Beanie Mehbies.
Is it just me? I took this whole thing to actually mean ‘real’ merchandise that could be meh branded.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
@cinoclav Judging by the 2nd and third examples at the top, I didn’t get that impression.
@lichme They probably shouldn’t have referred to it as ‘merchandise.’
@cinoclav @lichme Mehchandise?
@cinoclav @lichme Right. Typically you think merch to be promotional items, but those examples were not the case. Definition of merchandise is essentially anything you can buy which I guess includes movies and services…
@cinoclav @medz - NOW I get it. Great writeup, @skemmehs! A couple awkward constructions as usual, but I like that.
Technically not a British band:
@aetris is that @chadp on the left? I don’t know the others, except of course Irk and maybe bruce willis second from right?
@aetris @moonhat So glad you know me but not that others. I appreciate that.
@aetris @ChadP @moonhat I that was
/image william riker
@aetris @ChadP @moonhat
I’m guessing @ChadP, @Irk, @snapster, @matthew and @dave
@lichme specifically, paper bag snapster
@lichme - Yup.
@medz - Yup yup.
@moonhat - I need better photo sources…
@ChadP - What others?
The only photoshopping I did was to take a screenshot from Google, so don’t count me in with the creative people. I just found it fitting.
That was a very mediocre effort, @moonhat !!!
@aetris it was my first time attempting such a thing. Please be nice to me
@moonhat - I’ll provide you with some Meh images to throw in - Meh things up with some topical and pop-culture references and you’ll soon be above average:
@aetris that looks like more of challenge than I can handle… not sure
@moonhat - If you’re using Microsoft Paint, just open the picture you want to swipe from and use the lasso tool in the Select menu under the Home tab to surround just enough of the part of the image you want, then hold down the CTRL key and press C to copy it. Then open the target image and use CTRL V to paste it in. You can then use the mouse to drag it into position.
And don’t forget that the A icon in the Tools menu lets you put blocks of text in the image.
@aetris please do not expect great things from me, possibly don’t even expect mediocre things from me…
/giphy technically challenged
@aetris woohoo! Times up. I got nothin
@moonhat - Practice.
@lichme
@medz Well played
@lichme
@medz Haha!!
Also, @skemmehs starred it, so you know he’s been here.
Does your derpy dog always have its tongue sticking out drooling all over the place like it’s cute or something? Try a meh brand doggie drool catcher!
/giphy shots fired
This is a long contest, yo.
@medz either they are messing w us or they are not impressed with our submissions. I’m guessing the first option.
@tinamarie1974 Just ended today at noon. So we might have an update by Jan 3rd…
@medz when the IRKs ship
I totally missed that on the original note.
Really I just want to show off the all-time best piece of branded merchandise in my possession. The ms paint advice that @aetris gave @moonhat made me realize I could give it a more mediocre setting (so thanks!).
But you should definitely get some borderline obsolete plastic junk and write on it with sharpies if you are planning new mehrchandise.
@mossygreen what is that thing? Car locator?
@mossygreen @RiotDemon Looks like an ice scraper of some sort to me.
@mossygreen @RiotDemon @therealjrn
Text reads: To help locate car place over antenna and slide down until secure
@lichme @mossygreen @RiotDemon @therealjrn Must be old…ain’t nobody got antennas like that anymore…
@lichme @medz @mossygreen @RiotDemon What’s an antenna, Grandpa?
@lichme @mossygreen @RiotDemon @therealjrn
“In my day, Billy, an antenna is what set the men apart from the boys. The bigger and shinier the better. I could pull an AM radio signal in from a mile away, I tells ya.”
@RiotDemon @therealjrn
It’s a floor wax AND a dessert topping!
@mossygreen As far as I can tell, that thing is meant to act like a wind vane. You clip it onto your antenna which would make your car stand out from others?
@medz It’s a not-very-sturdy (by today’s standards) ice scraper that can ALSO be clipped to your car antenna! It has a blank space for printing a business name. Probably from the '80’s. Glenn of Glenn’s Bargain Center personalized them himself sometime in the mid '90’s.
@therealjrn I read the text, that’s why I asked about it being a car locator. Bizarre.
Ok @ChadP this one is for you. Since Michigan lost to ND and Ohio State, here is a great Meh inspired Michigan themed logo.
@bleedmichigan Yo, this one is really good. This one has my vote.
/giphy meh toothbrush
meh brand cupcake server
@medz why does one need a utensil for serving cupcakes. Are hands not good enough? Now that I look at that closer, is that a kitty litter scoop? Do you refer to cat turds as cupcakes (instead of the usual sweet treat, almond roca)??
@moonhat probably a regional thing…
Allllllright, the results are in.
For the People’s Choice award, @lichme wins a measly $10 coupon for “Amehzon Prime”
We all know lich probably cheated somehow, but we don’t want to rip this delicate democracy apart with investigations, trials, and recounts.
The Editor’s Choice award, @cinoclav wins a stunning $25 coupon for “BobbleSnapster”:
Yes, lich animated the actual bobble, which we found delightful, but (a) cinoclav made the original and (b) lich doesn’t need any more damn coupons.
Congratulations to the winners, condolences to the losers, and a special thanks to @medz for getting extra creepy:
(I’ll DM the winners with their coupon codes)
/giphy Congratulations!
Congrats to the weiners.
@skemmehs OMG. I’m both thoroughly embarrassed by my skills and completely honored and grateful for your picking BobbleSnapster (or uh, BS for short). Thanks all!
I feel we all were wieners here.
LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICH!!
@carl669 CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARL!
Yay for double discounted stuff. I haven’t gotten a DM yet, but if I had to guess, my code is going to be something like “LICHMESUXSKEMMEHSISKING”