The truth is the first one i found was so incredibly bizarre and with a completely wacky tune that this one seemed normal. At least it had a tune I'd heard before. Although i didn't think this rhyme had a tune tbh. Didn't stop to think about interspecies parenting or weird doctors mouth conditions, but figured this was close enough.
@collin1000 is right on about some of the videos on youtube.
The problem is that little monkeys don't listen, nor do they learn from the mistakes of others. They have to have the lesson physically bumped right into their own little monkey heads.
Obviously, Irk has never been to Walmart or the local mall.
Damned Mama lets her monkeys do more than jump on the bed. She sets them free to terrorize other shoppers. I am that mean lady who bluntly (and sometimes loudly if they're real pissers) tells them to knock off their bad behavior and go find their errant parent. You want to run around pell mell, & smack into me because I chose not to dodge your rampaging self? Yeah, it's probably going to be a bit embarrassing to be fussed at by a strange adult while you're picking yourself up off the floor. Don't get me wrong. There's a difference between an little one toddling along trying to learn how to negotiate the world, but a bit out of reach of a parent's safety grab, and a rambunctious kid.
@RedHot LOL! Thank you for making me feel more ancient than hauling around patio pavers have already done today! Next thing I know I'll catch myself telling the neighborhood crumbcrunchers to get offa mah lawn! I'll have to credit the usage to my librarian Gran who surrounded me with story& reference books she loved as a child. I sure do miss her. She witnessed quite a few things during her 100+ years. Sharp as a tack until the day she died. I just wish I had been tech savvy enough years ago to have recorded the stories she used to tell of her life.
You can also place some blame on the Doctor. The doctor just keeps saying the same thing, five times! You'd think by at least the third time the doctor would remember the mother and possibly give better advice, or at least tell the mother to call someone else.
I have this conversation with many a co-worker, family member, pediatrician, random person at the grocery store ... it's one of the things that grinds my gears the most. You would think after the second monkey, CPS would be there, or the doctor would be refusing to take the mom's calls. Although, in the book version that we have (10 monkeys jumping on the bed!), the doctor makes a housecall each time. That's a sweet amount of $$$ in the pocket for having to tend to the stupid.
Perhaps, it really is an insurance scam. Now I have to ponder this for a while.
In the book we have the monkeys change what they are doing each time. One time it's jumping, then skipping, spinning, swinging, etc. So each time the mother calls the doctor it is technically for a different reason. However the root of the issue is still the same, monkeys on the bed.
Further more, once the final monkey gets injured they move to the couch to start the antics all over again. Thankfully the books ends there and we don't have to go through all the injuries that are bound to occur on the couch.
@MrMark We have the same version. Have you noticed that by the end of the book, there are like 8-9 monkeys hanging out in the background, while they started with 5? #cantbeenunseen
@DrWorm That's because the monkeys that already did it are probably passed out from their friggin concussions. Either that, or they learned their lesson the hard way.
In some versions of the story, they even have the mama jumping on the bed as well. How F'ed up is that?!?
@DrWorm I LA-LA-LOVE your magnificently logical and literal interpretation! I only wish I could have thought of it first! @danoinct Any situation in which the same number or fewer monkeys are jumping on the bed does indeed fit the guidance prescribed by the doctor who has simply indicated that at no time should the quantities of monkeys jumping on the bed increase!
omg, thank you! That was exactly what I needed tonight!
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/the-doctor-said
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/little-monkeys-should-have-listened-1
(Hi, @marcee!)
@narfcake great minds...you beat me to it
@narfcake you guys are the best! Thanks narf!
@narfcake It is only because of these shirts that I learned about this song in the first place. Thanks (and no thanks?) woot
for those of us who agree with irk...
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/the-doctor-said?ref=cnt_ctlg_dgn_16
http://shirt.woot.com/offers/little-monkeys-should-have-listened-1?ref=cnt_ctlg_dgn_18
I own both of these...my 4 year old makes me wear them
They were also designed by a talented artist (Hi @Marcee!)
@jaybird aw, thanks jay. :)
I was ready to take offense at this, but it seems you've placed the indictment on the mother.
Just what I needed after losing a bet on UNC v Villanova!
Geez, am I a loser. I didn't get the fuku and I don't get this. I think there's something wrong with the planet I live on. (Monkeys? Doctor? Mama?)
@gertiestn Five Little Monkeys is an old nursery rhyme.
@gertiestn
@djslack wtf is wrong with that doctor's mouth?
@baqui63 I try not to question children's nursery rhyme videos on YouTube. Some of them are really messed up.
@djslack - Thanks for that, I had never heard the monkey song. Makes me wonder what else I missed in my childhood?
@djslack - Also, why isn't their mother a monkey?
The truth is the first one i found was so incredibly bizarre and with a completely wacky tune that this one seemed normal. At least it had a tune I'd heard before. Although i didn't think this rhyme had a tune tbh. Didn't stop to think about interspecies parenting or weird doctors mouth conditions, but figured this was close enough.
@collin1000 is right on about some of the videos on youtube.
Why isn't mama calling the veterinarian instead? They are monkeys! What does a doctor know about monkeys?
Or is it a monkey doctor...
OH MY GOD, it was Earth all along!
TAKE YOUR STINKING PAWS OFF ME, YOU DAMN DIRTY APE!
The problem is that little monkeys don't listen, nor do they learn from the mistakes of others. They have to have the lesson physically bumped right into their own little monkey heads.
Even then, some of them don't learn.
IRK IRK IRK IRK
First it's the Man in the Yellow Hat, now this. I think Irk has a problem with monkeys and their keepers.
Obviously, Irk has never been to Walmart or the local mall.
Damned Mama lets her monkeys do more than jump on the bed. She sets them free to terrorize other shoppers. I am that mean lady who bluntly (and sometimes loudly if they're real pissers) tells them to knock off their bad behavior and go find their errant parent.
You want to run around pell mell, & smack into me because I chose not to dodge your rampaging self? Yeah, it's probably going to be a bit embarrassing to be fussed at by a strange adult while you're picking yourself up off the floor.
Don't get me wrong. There's a difference between an little one toddling along trying to learn how to negotiate the world, but a bit out of reach of a parent's safety grab, and a rambunctious kid.
@LaVikinga haha you said "pell mell"
@RedHot Yes? Helter skelter, headlong, reckless. Basically, bad behavior reinforced by indifferent parenting.
@LaVikinga While I agree that wild mall kids are infuriating, I've never heard that phrase before
@RedHot LOL! Thank you for making me feel more ancient than hauling around patio pavers have already done today!
Next thing I know I'll catch myself telling the neighborhood crumbcrunchers to get offa mah lawn!
I'll have to credit the usage to my librarian Gran who surrounded me with story& reference books she loved as a child.
I sure do miss her. She witnessed quite a few things during her 100+ years. Sharp as a tack until the day she died. I just wish I had been tech savvy enough years ago to have recorded the stories she used to tell of her life.
My problem is that I keep wanting to spell it "monkies". But that aside, I fully agree with Irk. What a stupid kids' song.
You can also place some blame on the Doctor. The doctor just keeps saying the same thing, five times! You'd think by at least the third time the doctor would remember the mother and possibly give better advice, or at least tell the mother to call someone else.
GET OUT OF MY HEAD IRK!
I have this conversation with many a co-worker, family member, pediatrician, random person at the grocery store ... it's one of the things that grinds my gears the most. You would think after the second monkey, CPS would be there, or the doctor would be refusing to take the mom's calls. Although, in the book version that we have (10 monkeys jumping on the bed!), the doctor makes a housecall each time. That's a sweet amount of $$$ in the pocket for having to tend to the stupid.
Perhaps, it really is an insurance scam. Now I have to ponder this for a while.
In the book we have the monkeys change what they are doing each time. One time it's jumping, then skipping, spinning, swinging, etc. So each time the mother calls the doctor it is technically for a different reason. However the root of the issue is still the same, monkeys on the bed.
Further more, once the final monkey gets injured they move to the couch to start the antics all over again. Thankfully the books ends there and we don't have to go through all the injuries that are bound to occur on the couch.
@MrMark We have the same version. Have you noticed that by the end of the book, there are like 8-9 monkeys hanging out in the background, while they started with 5? #cantbeenunseen
My mother-in-law loved singing this song with my kids while she encouraged them to jump on the bed. She clearly missed the point of the song.
@matthew well done. Maybe I enjoyed this more than I should.
@hollboll Umm... don't you mean well done @Irk??
@conandlibrarian I mean, at the very least he edited the video...
I hate monkeys.
me too
But the mother does heed the doctor's advice. After each successive accident there are actually fewer monkeys jumping on the bed, not more.
@DrWorm That's because the monkeys that already did it are probably passed out from their friggin concussions. Either that, or they learned their lesson the hard way.
In some versions of the story, they even have the mama jumping on the bed as well. How F'ed up is that?!?
@DrWorm I LA-LA-LOVE your magnificently logical and literal interpretation! I only wish I could have thought of it first!
@danoinct Any situation in which the same number or fewer monkeys are jumping on the bed does indeed fit the guidance prescribed by the doctor who has simply indicated that at no time should the quantities of monkeys jumping on the bed increase!
Irk's puppeteer must have a 3 year old, too! I know I always thought the same thing when I read this story to my kid.
There must be a better way to teach my daughter to count down from five to 0 than to tell her a story about neglect and animal abuse!
@danoinct
5 bottles of beer on the wall
5 bottles of beer...