Meh Fantasy Football intermediately mediocre Leagues

@smigit2002 Last year’s playoffs would suggest otherwise.

(Aww… look at us. We’re already doing a better job of this.)

@christinewas You can’t bring up historical facts while I boast baselessly! That’s how a loser would fight

Looking forward to the rematch!

@smigit2002 Oops. Sometimes I forget that others have to boast baselessly.

@christinewas
only a loser would forget that

@sammydog01 It is.

@sammydog01 In a t-shirt purchased by @christinewas.

@joelmw
is she lying?

@f00l That’s a great question.

@becca
/giphy baba Booey to y’all

Nice pun though, right?

/giphy it’s the little things

@Rosstafari I’m talking to you (I think).

@joelmw Yeah, I uh… sorry… I’m… three kids… no sleep… behind on the forums. And trash talk.

Nice win?

@Rosstafari No apology necessary. You can lose to me any time. And, yeah, I’m pretty sure it was luck.

I’m Wasinger Prime (WASI), owner of the Badass Unicorns. Prime because I existed prior to any other Wasingers in the league (as far as I know at least).

Fear me.

@joelmw
F00l is the owner of the much-feared Fool’s FAIL.

You all suck

/giphy fool

@joelmw hello. I am @asgriffin. Alternatively known as @mehcus wife. And that’s probably my biggest claim to fame. Also, everyone prepare for the spanking I’m about to deliver to you this season.

@asgriffin That’s my girl. Watch out everyone, she’s feisty.

@joelmw Hello! I’m @becca. Despite not being much of a GoT fan (I mean, I watch it) I am A Team Has No Name (NN). In my main league (not that y’all aren’t important) I’m Valyrian Steelers so I figured I’d stick with the theme. Also (also) I’m evidently a big fan of parentheses.

@joelmw Hey there. I am @bruceoite, owner, manager, and sole proprietor of the team known as “Lucky TDs” (OITE). I look forward to showering in all of your tears.

@becca You have the best name. I love that show and those characters (Jaqen–when he had a name–and Arya). Nevertheless, you need to lose.

@joelmw I’m Bawlmer JML326. If you didn’t figure out who i am before… get your eyes checked. I took a year off from Meh Fantasy fooseball but I am back to claim my top prize. @f00l go hopkins?

@f00l Two of great (and insufficiently despised) sins:

1. The grotesque bastardization of Elizabethan English by amateurs trying to sound King Jamesy biblical or epic or highfalutin or what the fuck ever by dropping an “eth” at the end of a word. The gif’s usage is utterly incorrect and grates on my nerves like nails on a chalkboard. At least your image didn’t throw the suffix on a noun or on multiple consecutive words. That would have been even worse. Still, obviously wrong. And annoying.

2. The second is like unto it. Idiots who don’t understand meter–usually at all–and who toss out incoherent shit that sort of sometimes rhymes but not only doesn’t have feet of the sort Seuss used but isn’t metrically sound to begin with and call it Seussical.

Don’t do both or I might have to literally kill you.

I’ll take great pleasure in humiliating you.

@asgriffin You may think you gain our sympathy because you’re married to @MEHcus (and you do), but that won’t stop me from ending your delusions of adequacy.

@bruceoite
/giphy tears of joy

@jml326
/giphy I don’t know you

I don’t know that I’ve got everyone’s name, btw. I just grabbed from a comment by @hollboll. I guess she should be the one to set me straight if I’m wrong, but anyone else who knows better should chime in.

@jml326
I might have known a hookins once. Strictly drive-by association, from their perspective. They are always into disowning due to extreme embarrassment. Assholes. Why dey gotta be like dat?

@joelmw
Oh, I’m impressed! You know how to offer pure pleasure, doncha, MR English Professor?

You have just handed me a most excellent Friday.

Please please please come over and try to kill me, Elizabethan-expert! We all need some entertainment now and then. Please please please. Meet me in a state that is (obviously) traditionally illiterate and Proud Of It!
(open carry state, be prepped, ok?)

I was hoping for something else w that giphy, but what came up was so awesome, I had to let it be.

Guess what? This will shock you, so do be prepared!
I know nothing-eth about pretty much Elizabethan-eth anything-eth and am completely ignorant-eth regarding rhyme-eth, rhythm-eth, and-eth meter-eth.
I know that statement is so very hard to believe. Just take it on faith. I know I can convince you in the end-eth.

Let’s see here. Must tink.
I tinks, I tinks, Precious!

–

Our-Eth Season-Eth
By F00L-eth
(For @joelmw-eth)

I think that-eth I will-eth never C
A football-eth stuck in a tree.
In fact, when-eth the footballs fall
You team-eth will never catch the ball.
Any tree-eth that caught two footballs two
Will drop-eth all-eth straight-eth down on you!

Happy Friday!

@joelmw Like your poem FOOL-eth… Anyway, hi, I’m Liz, owner of Team Comet…though I’m thinking about changing my name to Team Kanye cuz Imma let you finish…behind me! (And yes, I know how very lame that was. If it helps, I’m disappointed in myself for writing it.) This is my first year in the Meh league and 3rd year in FF. Torn today because if my team does well here, I’m going to get clobbered in my other league by my ever critiquing bro.

@joelmw I haven’t changed my team name just yet, trying to think of something punny. @dalek’s team is Doesyourface ComeInMens.

@bfb62185
Well then we are depending on you to talk w jmw f2f.

@f00l There will be much talking of trash when we make the annual pilgrimage (ha) from the ridiculous (TX) to the sublime (CO) for the and and whatnot.

Or maybe not. @bfb62185 and I aren’t so much the trash talkers, at least with each other. But maybe this will open a new layer in our relationship.

@f00l
/giphy face palm