May day? Mayday? May goat! (May 2022 nomination)

@werehatrack Whomever the goat is next month, I might be the first poster with a blame. Even if by some miracle I am rewarded with the highest honor one could get, I still might blame myself. Is that even possible or allowed? My co-owner Mrs. Felton10 is having cancer surgery in the very near future and I will have the responsibility to act as her comfort bird. So might there be double duty for me in the future. Who knows.

@Walterbird @werehatrack Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that. I hope the surgery goes really well; please give her my best wishes, and take good care if her!

@Walterbird
For your mom:

@Walterbird @werehatrack Sounds like walterbird then needs a nomination retraction.

@Walterbird Hope the surgery goes well and there is a best case outcome.

@Kidsandliz @Walterbird @werehatrack maybe an exception can be made and have @werehatrack serve as @Walterbird’s delegate for the month of May (assuming a “win”).

@Kidsandliz @njfan @Walterbird Erp. Ummm.

Mumblety years ago, on a placid Tuesday afternoon, I got a call from a friend and business associate asking me if I could cover for a mistake he’d made. He had accidentally booked himself in as a dealer at two different conventions on the fast-approaching weekend. Could I take one of them? I said I would, and upon arriving at said event, I walked up to Registration and said “Hi. I’m the Emergency Holographic $FRIEND’S_NAME, here to set up in the dealer room.” The gal at the table looked up, and said “You’re taller, and better looking.” So yes, I’ve been the EH before, but really, the record suggests (strongly!) that somebody else needs to suggest another nominee. If I do it, the best the candidate can expect to do is finish in second place…

@Kidsandliz @njfan @Walterbird @werehatrack Well, I’m pretty sure you’re at least taller than @Walterbird, but I think there are some other regulars around here who deserve some blame.

@Walterbird I hope your Mom, Mrs. Felton10, comes through her surgery with flying colors! Best wishes to the whole family for a speedy and complete recovery (and I’m not voting for you this month so you can spend your time caring for the Mrs.).

@phendrick yes

@phendrick Absolutely-without a doubt.

@Kidsandliz @Walterbird Accepted. (I blame myself for that.)

@phendrick I have more shit I can blame you for it you want… There is an almost endless supply if you include all the dumb things ill prepared students do that then make more work for me… Of course that I have work at all as an adjunct is an unblame… but given a choice I’d vote with my feet from this particular job. Since that isn’t a choice I deal with it and can start blaming you if you are feeling deprived/neglected.

@phendrick there seems to have been a lack of blame the last few goats. The threads fell off the front page. Maybe the last few years recalibrated and things were getting slowly better? Hold on I have one let me go find yours

@mike808 @inabsentia has failed to enter the building.

And this raises the question: Is nonexistence a reason for disqualification from being the Goat?

@werehatrack Why would it be?
There exist Goat Emeritii as proof of the following claims:

• Participation is not required.
• Personhood is not required.
  I posit there is no detectable difference between this candidate and the above claims with repect to performing the duties of Goat.

One can therefore conclude that @inabsentia is completely capable of fulfilling the burdens of the position, if selected.

@mike808 @werehatrack well, if that’s the case Glen should ne nominated

@ironcheftoni @werehatrack
Nominate whomever you like.

@Kyeh I’m Werehatrack, and I take no public position on this nomination that has all of the support I can give it.