Mad Ape Den: Troubleshooting

Yes. Common abbreviations and slang terms are ok, simply misspelling a word to shorten it isn't. There is a Mad Ape Den FAQ, I'll see if I can find it.

Note: FAQ is from here: http://web.archive.org/web/20061205014533/http://madapeden.com/#28 I didn't write it.

A FAQ for the Few Who Do Not "Get" Mad Ape Den

Thy pal and my own, Ezz, did put pen to pad and got out a FAQ for us to see how MAD is to go, if you ask to not get hit by the Mad Ape Cop. It's not in Mad Ape Den on its own, as to be so is to ask not to be of aid for the men (and gal set) who do not get it.


    Que es “Mad Ape Den?”


    Mad Ape Den is a mode of communication in which speakers and writers use words containing no more than three letters. This constraint forces users of Mad Ape Den to find novel ways of expressing familiar concepts.

    How do I use Mad Ape Den?


    Users of Mad Ape Den must follow a few simple rules in addition to the basic injunction of three letters or fewer. These guidelines ensure ease of understanding among the Mad Ape set.


        Use words that are recognized parts of speech appearing in English dictionaries. Do not make up your own words, because however witty your neologisms may be, they are likely to stump the rest of us. The rule of thumb is that if your audience cannot find a word in a general-purpose dictionary then you are being too obscure. When in doubt, use the OED.
        Use standard spelling. Any fool can use the hammer and anvil of misspelling to deform the language. You must spell words as they appear in the dictionary.
        Marks of punctuation (. ’ ? / ;) do not count as characters for purposes of the three-or-fewer rule, because we do not read them aloud.
        Abbreviations are acceptable provided they can be found in a dictionary.
        Treat numerals as you would letters of the alphabet; that is, let each numeral count as a letter. Thus 3, IV, 666, and 299 are all acceptable in writing. You may, of course, spell out numbers provided that their names (one, two, pi) are Mad Ape Den compliant.

    Pen VS. Gab

    Expect conversations in Mad Ape Den to be time-consuming affairs, with long pauses as participants grope for three-letter equivalents for everyday sesquipedalianisms.

    Writing in Mad Ape Den is much easier than speaking it. The writer is not under immediate time pressure from his audience and may therefore take his or her time finding le mot juste. Furthermore, many words, especially numbers and abbreviations, comply with the three-or-fewer rule only when written. And homophones (or, ore, o’er) that confound the ear are easily distinguishable in print.

    Bad Ape Den, or, “Le ape den mal”

    Deliberate violations of the above guidelines are known collectively as “Bad Ape Den.” Bad Ape Den can get you in hot H2O. Do not try it.

    Some people revel in testing the limits of Mad Ape Den, turning phrases that cause more conservative members of the Mad Ape Set to frown or wince. Others achieve similar reactions through mere sloppiness. The latter are said to promote “Cad Ape Den,” an obnoxious though harmless abuse of the idiom.

If you get it now, go out and say how it is to a pal. Get thy wit on and put pen to pad so we can all see you do the Mad Ape jig!