I only believe that kind things come back if others reciprocate it. I don’t think the universe determines to send nice things my way for being nice, but folks might “pay it forward” which eventually may have a positive impact on me in a roundabout way.
I recently gave a person my umbrella. I was going to spend most of that rainy day indoors, but this person clearly was not.
I dunno…I’m not thinking about that when I do my random acts of kindness or any act of kindness. I’m just hoping the recipient benefited somehow from that kindness…even if only a smile…they may not have had anything to smile about in a long time. I love love love being generous and helping however I can. I never expect anything in return…my inner voice just hopes there was some happiness for the recipient.
@kathleen1966 Yes, this. I can be having a really crappy day and be feeling a bit depressed, when a small act of kindness, given or received, really elevates my mood. That’s the real payback. If a kindness given eventually gets paid forward, that’s a bonus.
@rockblossom absolutely! When I’m having a crappy day and do something kind for someone it definitely lifts my spirits big-time! I remember i was having a bad day at work and had to do a bank run (for work) and saw a new co-worker I didn’t know outside crying…she was very sweet so while i was out doing work bank stuff i passed a florist and brought her back a bouquet of flowers…just to see her sad tears turn into not sad tears and it was awesome!
I don’t believe in the kind of karma where an action someone initiates comes back to them, but I believe in a kind of karma where an action someone initiates comes back to the person next in their position.
As for favorite moments of surprise kindness I’ve been able to show, it has to be the times I managed to feed parking meters before the metermaid spotted the expiration. I actually got threatened with a fine for doing it by a (male) metermaid one time near the Art Museum.
Hmm, so actually I would add that my specific favorite would have to be the times I managed to successfully feed a Philly meter with a Canadian quarter!
@aetris Sometimes the universe seems to want to tell me something. As I was reading your post this commercial came on my tv, this is the first time I’ve seen this commercial. Dang, the copy feature is disabled but you can see it on you tube.
@aetris@stolicat Wish I could afford to do that. If I’m lucky enough to find a meter for my class 2 days a week at the art museum, I pay $3.50 each time for my parking. Usually I’m not lucky and I have to pay $5 for a parking lot further away. $28-40 a month for parking for my class is a real expense. Doubling that would hurt.
@moondrake - It’s been almost two decades since I last worked in that area, but there used to be free street parking a few blocks NW of the Whole Foods. The problem with meters is that one parking fine and suddenly that $30/mo lot looks like a smart investment! I don’t suppose you could carpool?
@aetris You are thinking of a different city, our Whole Foods is about 15 miles from the art museum. There is no free parking in our downtown area except for a small handful of businesses that have guards. I’m not close with anyone in the class. I have gotten friends to try it a couple of times and we carpooled, but they didn’t last more than one 8 week session, none of them are artists, really. I keep meaning to call the lot I use and ask about monthly rates but I don’t think they have one. It’s a “stick your cash in the slot” place. There are two garages reasonably close but their rates are very high. I just wish the city had put the art museum someplace more accessible. We have an arts and entertainment district that’s filled with big buildings and streets with no parking, the few meters are always full. People coming to a special event don’t blink at paying $10-15 for a parking garage, but when you are taking classes 8 days a month it adds up.
@moondrake - I should add that something I have done although not in a LONG time is park in Powelton Village and walk across the Spring Garden Street Bridge to the Art Museum. Kathy Change danced by me one time when I was doing that, obviously a very long time ago. I wouldn’t park an Audi A8 around there though, and have no idea if the street parking is still free.
Good people who do good things do so out of their nature, and would not know any other way to be.
Good people who do bad things are wracked with guilt (conscious or subconscious), and will take it out on themselves one way or another. At the very least, they will consider any negative thing that happens to them as “payback”.
Bad people who do good things don’t give a damn either way, and are at best amused by it.
Bad people who do bad things are not morally troubled by it, and they go on in life without any (conscious or subconscious) self-imposed repercussions. Good or bad things that happen to them are not in their minds connected to their actions.
Good and bad are not subjective constructions; there is universal good/right and universal bad/wrong.
And that damn pesky gray area in between, where most of us live…
I believe in sowing and reaping. So… yeah. I really enjoy being able to do stuff or help others. And yes, it comes back to me. Time and time again.
One of my fav things was some yrs ago… I was in a Hobby Lobby and was going to have some balloons filled for an event. There was a younger woman ahead of me and she was frantic because apparently she had put in an order for 14 specific balloons for her daughter’s bday party that afternoon and they were supposed to be ready and they hadn’t even started them and she was only on her lunch break from work. She was trying to be patient while this 90 something yr old looking woman was verrrrry slowly trying to get it done. 3 balloons in about 10 minutes. She was about in tears, she was telling the employee that she had to leave to go back to work or get in trouble and she wouldn’t have time later to get them as she had to pick her daughter up from school directly after work and bring her to her surprise party which was at a ceramics shop clear on the other side of the city. That’s when I butt in and told her, you go to work, give me the address and I’ll have the balloons there when you get there. She looked at me just totally stunned and I guess having no other options (I told her to pay it forward), she decided to trust me, gave me the address, hugged me and left. I waited and loaded up the balloons and drove them clear to the other side of town (about 15 miles) and helped the people there tie them to the children’s chairs and I left. I know she had to be wondering all day if the balloons would really be there or not. That was fun.
I think doing good uplifts you, you could call that karma. I think it also inspires others to do good, and perhaps that will one day directly circle back around to you. But even if it does not, it certainly makes your immediate world better. But all ripple effects aside, I know that being able to help someone makes me feel better, lightens my step, brightens my day. It is it’s own reward.
@moondrake Certainly I know I am sometimes prompted to go out of my way to help someone because I know I have benefited from help from others in the past. I guess that falls under “Paying it forward”. I don’t usually think about it like that, but I’d guess that may influence my actions when I think about how I have been grateful when random people have helped me.
In the last couple of weeks I drove a homeless young guy with a large laundry basket full of junk back to where he was staying (we were at the dumpster where I live, I was pulling blankets out of there that someone else threw out because they had sewer water on them; that person refused my offer to wash them at the no kill shelter as she was grossed out about the sewer water - we live in hud so cost of washing matters - I gave the blankets then to the no kill shelter). He seemed “safe” and had pulled out several blankets for me that had landed near the bottom. I also drove someone else to the ER (I was filling up gas, she was waiting for the bus in the rain so was sitting on the trash can by me) as her 6 year old was there with as asthma attack. Took someone else to the grocery store because she had wrecked her car (someone in this building, don’t really know her, just overheard her need, I had the time, it wasn’t all that far away…).
I know in these cases I felt happy being able to help them and thus, at least temporarily, felt less discouraged about my own situation. As you said, doing so has its own reward.
Well research documents that when you do a random act of kindness for someone they are more likely, at least for a little while that day, to then “pay it forward”. In friendship there is a norm of “reciprocity” so by helping a friend they are more likely to help you “back” at a different point in time. There is other research that documents different reasons why people help strangers…
As far as karma - in the universal sense I don’t think that exists. In the sense of your family, friends and acquaintances - I think your behavior likely increases the odds you get back what you give pos or neg.
I only believe that kind things come back if others reciprocate it. I don’t think the universe determines to send nice things my way for being nice, but folks might “pay it forward” which eventually may have a positive impact on me in a roundabout way.
I recently gave a person my umbrella. I was going to spend most of that rainy day indoors, but this person clearly was not.
I definitely believe in Karma, good and bad.
I dunno…I’m not thinking about that when I do my random acts of kindness or any act of kindness. I’m just hoping the recipient benefited somehow from that kindness…even if only a smile…they may not have had anything to smile about in a long time. I love love love being generous and helping however I can. I never expect anything in return…my inner voice just hopes there was some happiness for the recipient.
@kathleen1966 Yes, this. I can be having a really crappy day and be feeling a bit depressed, when a small act of kindness, given or received, really elevates my mood. That’s the real payback. If a kindness given eventually gets paid forward, that’s a bonus.
@rockblossom absolutely! When I’m having a crappy day and do something kind for someone it definitely lifts my spirits big-time! I remember i was having a bad day at work and had to do a bank run (for work) and saw a new co-worker I didn’t know outside crying…she was very sweet so while i was out doing work bank stuff i passed a florist and brought her back a bouquet of flowers…just to see her sad tears turn into not sad tears and it was awesome!
I don’t believe in the kind of karma where an action someone initiates comes back to them, but I believe in a kind of karma where an action someone initiates comes back to the person next in their position.
As for favorite moments of surprise kindness I’ve been able to show, it has to be the times I managed to feed parking meters before the metermaid spotted the expiration. I actually got threatened with a fine for doing it by a (male) metermaid one time near the Art Museum.
Hmm, so actually I would add that my specific favorite would have to be the times I managed to successfully feed a Philly meter with a Canadian quarter!
@aetris Sometimes the universe seems to want to tell me something. As I was reading your post this commercial came on my tv, this is the first time I’ve seen this commercial. Dang, the copy feature is disabled but you can see it on you tube.
@aetris @moondrake I always reload my meter to the max before I leave a space, as I know how it makes me feel to find a space with a loaded meter.
@aetris @stolicat Wish I could afford to do that. If I’m lucky enough to find a meter for my class 2 days a week at the art museum, I pay $3.50 each time for my parking. Usually I’m not lucky and I have to pay $5 for a parking lot further away. $28-40 a month for parking for my class is a real expense. Doubling that would hurt.
@moondrake - It’s been almost two decades since I last worked in that area, but there used to be free street parking a few blocks NW of the Whole Foods. The problem with meters is that one parking fine and suddenly that $30/mo lot looks like a smart investment! I don’t suppose you could carpool?
@aetris You are thinking of a different city, our Whole Foods is about 15 miles from the art museum. There is no free parking in our downtown area except for a small handful of businesses that have guards. I’m not close with anyone in the class. I have gotten friends to try it a couple of times and we carpooled, but they didn’t last more than one 8 week session, none of them are artists, really. I keep meaning to call the lot I use and ask about monthly rates but I don’t think they have one. It’s a “stick your cash in the slot” place. There are two garages reasonably close but their rates are very high. I just wish the city had put the art museum someplace more accessible. We have an arts and entertainment district that’s filled with big buildings and streets with no parking, the few meters are always full. People coming to a special event don’t blink at paying $10-15 for a parking garage, but when you are taking classes 8 days a month it adds up.
@moondrake - I should add that something I have done although not in a LONG time is park in Powelton Village and walk across the Spring Garden Street Bridge to the Art Museum. Kathy Change danced by me one time when I was doing that, obviously a very long time ago. I wouldn’t park an Audi A8 around there though, and have no idea if the street parking is still free.
@moondrake - Whoops, missed your reply! I did say “Philly” somewhere, though. Good luck!
Yeah, they come back and kick me in the ass.
/giphy I’m not bitter.
I think:
Good people who do good things do so out of their nature, and would not know any other way to be.
Good people who do bad things are wracked with guilt (conscious or subconscious), and will take it out on themselves one way or another. At the very least, they will consider any negative thing that happens to them as “payback”.
Bad people who do good things don’t give a damn either way, and are at best amused by it.
Bad people who do bad things are not morally troubled by it, and they go on in life without any (conscious or subconscious) self-imposed repercussions. Good or bad things that happen to them are not in their minds connected to their actions.
Good and bad are not subjective constructions; there is universal good/right and universal bad/wrong.
And that damn pesky gray area in between, where most of us live…
I believe in sowing and reaping. So… yeah. I really enjoy being able to do stuff or help others. And yes, it comes back to me. Time and time again.
One of my fav things was some yrs ago… I was in a Hobby Lobby and was going to have some balloons filled for an event. There was a younger woman ahead of me and she was frantic because apparently she had put in an order for 14 specific balloons for her daughter’s bday party that afternoon and they were supposed to be ready and they hadn’t even started them and she was only on her lunch break from work. She was trying to be patient while this 90 something yr old looking woman was verrrrry slowly trying to get it done. 3 balloons in about 10 minutes. She was about in tears, she was telling the employee that she had to leave to go back to work or get in trouble and she wouldn’t have time later to get them as she had to pick her daughter up from school directly after work and bring her to her surprise party which was at a ceramics shop clear on the other side of the city. That’s when I butt in and told her, you go to work, give me the address and I’ll have the balloons there when you get there. She looked at me just totally stunned and I guess having no other options (I told her to pay it forward), she decided to trust me, gave me the address, hugged me and left. I waited and loaded up the balloons and drove them clear to the other side of town (about 15 miles) and helped the people there tie them to the children’s chairs and I left. I know she had to be wondering all day if the balloons would really be there or not. That was fun.
@lseeber nope, that was just fucking awesome!
@lseeber
Wow. You good!
@f00l Sometimes, lol.
@lseeber Wow you made her day!!!
I think doing good uplifts you, you could call that karma. I think it also inspires others to do good, and perhaps that will one day directly circle back around to you. But even if it does not, it certainly makes your immediate world better. But all ripple effects aside, I know that being able to help someone makes me feel better, lightens my step, brightens my day. It is it’s own reward.
@moondrake Certainly I know I am sometimes prompted to go out of my way to help someone because I know I have benefited from help from others in the past. I guess that falls under “Paying it forward”. I don’t usually think about it like that, but I’d guess that may influence my actions when I think about how I have been grateful when random people have helped me.
In the last couple of weeks I drove a homeless young guy with a large laundry basket full of junk back to where he was staying (we were at the dumpster where I live, I was pulling blankets out of there that someone else threw out because they had sewer water on them; that person refused my offer to wash them at the no kill shelter as she was grossed out about the sewer water - we live in hud so cost of washing matters - I gave the blankets then to the no kill shelter). He seemed “safe” and had pulled out several blankets for me that had landed near the bottom. I also drove someone else to the ER (I was filling up gas, she was waiting for the bus in the rain so was sitting on the trash can by me) as her 6 year old was there with as asthma attack. Took someone else to the grocery store because she had wrecked her car (someone in this building, don’t really know her, just overheard her need, I had the time, it wasn’t all that far away…).
I know in these cases I felt happy being able to help them and thus, at least temporarily, felt less discouraged about my own situation. As you said, doing so has its own reward.
Well research documents that when you do a random act of kindness for someone they are more likely, at least for a little while that day, to then “pay it forward”. In friendship there is a norm of “reciprocity” so by helping a friend they are more likely to help you “back” at a different point in time. There is other research that documents different reasons why people help strangers…
As far as karma - in the universal sense I don’t think that exists. In the sense of your family, friends and acquaintances - I think your behavior likely increases the odds you get back what you give pos or neg.