G.O.A.T. Birthday story


So, in honor of Meh’s birthday, today’s greatest of all time is the greatest of all time birthday stories. It is about the birthday of King Henry VI of England.

Now, you all know in days of old, when knights were bold they all loved their holy relics. The Holy Grail is most famous today, but was fairly obscure back in the day. Instead things like the finger bone of St. Paul or the heart of St. Cuthbert were all the rage.

Now, Henry V heard about a really important relic in France. This was years after he has kicked French butt at the battle of Agincourt, so he was pretty confident he could walk all over them.

He sent a group of knights on a holy quest: to retrieve the foreskin of Jesus. (Indy eat your heart out).

Naturally, they succeeded and brought Jesus’s foreskin back to England. Henry gave Jesus’s foreskin to his wife (as husband’s are wont to do). His wife used the foreskin as a calming device during the birthing process by reportedly sniffing it.

So guys, you want to make your wife’s labor go easier. Give them someone’s foreskin to sniff.

I don’t think we know what happened to most Holy relics, this one, like most have disappeared over the years. Just like most relics, this was certainly fake… Probably a piece of dried lambskin… It has probably rotted away over the centuries.

Anyhow that’s my greatest of all time birthday stories… Let me know if you have one you prefer.

Happy birthday Meh!