The kind that reaches all the way to my ankles (without low-riding like a drunken gangster) —
to reduce topical interactions with my environment (scratches, rashes, splashes, &c.)
to reduce sunburns [in summer]
to stay warmer in “winter” (outdoors) or summer (indoors)
But, probably most importantly, so I don’t feel awkwardly half-dressed.
I have no problem with other people wearing shorts, and I don’t necessarily think they look funny on others, but they sure feel “wrong” on me. I used to wear them sometimes as a kid, but I grew out of that or something.
The best are shorts that trip the breaker before anything torches, and are easy to find and fix. The worst kind are the ones in the middle of a conduit, that developed because some idiot specified Teflon insulation on the wiring. The second worst are the ones in old wiring that has cloth covering that catches fire when it gets hot enough.
For clothing, shorts that are actually short, as in with an inseam of 3 in or less. And don’t give me any bullshit about needing dangle room, you know you can deal with that in a socially responsible way. None of the rest of us have the slightest interest in your braggadocio and exaggerations, so just keep that to yourself.
No-friggin’-draw-strings. C’mon man! What is this? Put a snap and a zipper on them so a man can do what a man has to do. I bet guys that wear these sit down to tinkle.
Daisy Dukes
@heartny As long as your junk doesn’t hang out the bottom, i say go for it. You be you!
Gym shorts
Stretchy shorts
Pants
Pixar.
The short short ones at the women’s volleyball game; the long long ones at WalMart.
Jogging shorts.
The kind that reaches all the way to my ankles (without low-riding like a drunken gangster) —
But, probably most importantly, so I don’t feel awkwardly half-dressed.
I have no problem with other people wearing shorts, and I don’t necessarily think they look funny on others, but they sure feel “wrong” on me. I used to wear them sometimes as a kid, but I grew out of that or something.
I accept that I’m the
weird oneodd one out.@xobzoo not that this directly relates but it was always interesting when grampa wore shorts. That was… Some very white leg meat
Five Second Films.
Capris that have a side pocket for phone.
Do grey sweatshorts work the same as grey sweatpants? I have a second pair of socks I need to show off.
Skirts
Dress shorts. Same material and style as dress pants but only knee length. Business above the knee, party from the knee down.
@sjk3 IME, the best parties occur above the knees.
athletic shorts
The best are shorts that trip the breaker before anything torches, and are easy to find and fix. The worst kind are the ones in the middle of a conduit, that developed because some idiot specified Teflon insulation on the wiring. The second worst are the ones in old wiring that has cloth covering that catches fire when it gets hot enough.
For clothing, shorts that are actually short, as in with an inseam of 3 in or less. And don’t give me any bullshit about needing dangle room, you know you can deal with that in a socially responsible way. None of the rest of us have the slightest interest in your braggadocio and exaggerations, so just keep that to yourself.
No-friggin’-draw-strings. C’mon man! What is this? Put a snap and a zipper on them so a man can do what a man has to do. I bet guys that wear these sit down to tinkle.
Peak shorts. How can I compete with that?