4/12/20 What you say... Hoppy Easter...

chienfou thought this was worth mentioning said

Sometimes a question is the perfect opportunity to drop some humor into a situation, for instance…

Longtime Patient (talking to me): How long have you been here?
Me: since 2:45 (knowing full well they meant how many years)

Patient (to me when I am about to give them a shot) Is this gonna hurt?
Me: NO… unless I hit myself in the thumb…

One I have mentioned before that I used on my kids:
Child :Hey, Dad… Do you know what time it is?
Me (looking at my watch): Yep.

And of course the classic
Dr: Do you smoke after sex
Patient: I dunno, I never noticed.

Do you have any snarky responses/comebacks you use frequently?