Truman's Gentlemen's Groomers 14-Piece Hair & Face Care Set
- Face it: you should be better to your face
- You get two tubes each of: moisturizing shampoo, facial cleanser, facial scrub, facial moisturizer, and hair styling paste
- Also four tubes of lip balm
- If you bought this all individually on Amazon? Yikes would it be pricey!
- Can it make a margarita: No, but in some ways, it’s like a margarita for your face… wait, what?
Face The Facts
Hey. It’s me. Your face. We need to talk.
Now, I don’t want to come in too negative, so I’m going to start with a few things I appreciate. First off, thank you for applying sunscreen to me. Very hastily. Every fifth time you go outside. And I respect your commitment to conservation, really I do. Like how you rub a bunch of shampoo into your hair and then let it run off in the shower, down my cheeks, and you consider that a done deal. It’s impressive.
Is that enough to establish a positive rapport between us, so that I may level a few pieces of constructive criticism?
Great.
Okay, here’s my first question for you to consider on the road to personal betterment: uhh, what the fuck, dude? Or, to be more specific: like, what the literal fuck is your fucking problem?
No matter what the temperature, you drag me out, giving me no shelter. In the summer, that means sweat streams down from the hair causing my forehead to glisten and turning my eyes painful and bloodshot. In the winter, the wind whips at me, punishing me, leaving me raw and cracked. Unless it gets below zero. At which point, you apply a piece of wool to my chin.
Really fucking helpful, man! No, seriously, totally solves the problem!
Obviously, I’m bitter. Really, really bitter. But all is not lost. We can salvage our relationship. We can put our–or, let’s be honest, your–mistakes behind us, and we can move forward as good friends. All you have to do is buy today’s Meh deal.
What is it? A collection of products from Truman’s Gentleman’s Groomers designed to pamper your hair and face. Honestly, you get everything you need for a happier head, from the simple and utilitarian (moisturizing shampoo, lip balm, facial cleanser) to the indulgent and luxurious (facial scrub, facial moisturizer) to the fun and stylish (hair styling paste). And you get two bottles/tubes of everything. For only about 30 bucks.
That’s enough to make me stop complaining pronto!
So hit the buy button and think about me, your dear sweet face, for once in your life.
