Cheek Support

Can I confess something? I like road trips.

Now, maybe this seems like a silly way to frame this. Is this really a “confession,” after all? Road trips are a great American tradition.

But here’s the thing: I’m not talking about a cool kind. Driving with a couple friends up and down California’s scenic highways, gasping at the views. Or winding through the Badlands and stopping at Wall Drug.

No, I’m talking about the boring road trip. I’m talking about four hours on the interstate to Sioux Falls or eight hours to Cincinnati with a stop for lunch in Indianapolis.

I can’t explain my enjoyment, really. Maybe it’s because, driving day-to-day in a mid-sized city, I end up stopping and starting so much, experiencing a constant low-boil stress that does not correspond to the meager distance traveled or the destination. So it’s nice to merge onto the highway, set the cruise control, and relax while rocketing through space.

My hands on the wheel. My eyes on the road. My mind clear except for those moments when I must speak the ancient incantation taught to me by a witch to put a hex on all those who fail to understand the left lane is for passing.

On the radio: a podcast. In my cupholder: some sickly sweet canned coffee (but don’t worry; not THAT canned coffee). For a snack: Pizza Combos, which, due to some backroom legislation passed in the 1980s, can only be sold in gas stations within 200 yards of a major highway and are prohibited from being consumed by anyone traveling fewer than 100 miles. Or, at least, it feels that way, doesn’t it?

But while this trio–the podcast, the caffeine, the salty snack–keep my mind entertained and nourished (and the latter two work together to create an exciting puzzle that keeps my gastrointestinal system on its toes), there is one part of me that can, and often does, fall asleep.

My ass.

But this thing could help!

What is it? Well, it’s a durable seat cushion for your car that provides comfort and lumbar support and improves posture from a company called “Angel Ride.” And if that sounds a little over-the-top, wait until you see the thing.

Now, if you’re like, “How can I be sure this thing is comfortable? Is there some bizarre test that it has passed?” I have great news! From the marketing copy:

PASSES THE EGG TEST: it’s so supportive, that you can sit on an egg without the risk of breakage — a demonstration of cushioning prowess!

Hey, Angel Ride? We’re going to go ahead and take your word for it, okay?

Still, egg test or not, this thing could be the difference between a pleasant road trip or daily commute and some serious discomfort. So buy one and give your butt a bit more support.