24-Pack: Black Rifle Coffee Company Espresso Mocha
- 200mg of caffeine (so, about 2 cups of coffee’s worth in each can)
- 170 calories, 7 grams of protein
- Aggressive cans
- Usually a lot more expensive
- Best By January 2024
- Can it make a margarita: No, but you could probably use it in some sort of terrifying version of a White Russian
For The Caffeine Fiends
On the one hand, there are some pretty aggressive design choices on display here. On the other hand, when you name your company after a gun, you’ve already come in pretty hot. Like, it’d look ridiculous to apply the veneer of sleek Silicon Valley minimalism to something called “Black Rifle Coffee.”
But anyway, we’re not here to discuss the packaging. (Except, we should mention the part of the packaging that states this stuff has a BEST BY DATE OF JANUARY 2024. We know, we know! Months between the sale and the best-by date? What the hell are we? A reputable store?!)
Anyway, this stuff, to us, fits into a very specific category: the kind of thing you only allow yourself to enjoy while on a long road trip. A Purge-esque time when laws cease to apply to your caloric intake and/or spending, you can finally indulge in a number of questionable consumables. Those taquitos that roll and roll and roll. An apple fritter with icing an inch thick. And canned coffee.
Those first two things you usually regret before you even finish them. But a good sweet-ish canned coffee drink? That’s always pretty satisfying, isn’t it? And yet, again, you never go back for another until the next time you find yourself in the car for more than 2 hours.
Why? Three simple reasons:
- It’s not good for you.
- It has too much caffeine.
- It’s too pricey.
Except, those first two points aren’t even really true. These things pack 170 calories, which, sure, is maybe a lot compared to a cup of black coffee. But it’s not an impossible amount to fit into a healthy day. Plus, it has some protein. Like, 7 grams. So it’s giving you something. As for the caffeine: again, 200mg is a lot compared to a single cup of coffee. Like, just over twice as much, actually. But again: it’s not a totally crazy amount to incorporate into your diet.
Which leaves us only the cost. And this one makes sense. At the gas station, these are gonna run you probably… what? $3+ per can? That’s too much to spend every day on your favorite canned coffee.
Which is why it’s a good thing we have a 24-pack for $29.99.
So buy some! It’s tasty, we’re told!
(Oh, and if you’ve had this stuff before, be sure to drop your thoughts in the comments. We always appreciate that.)