Limite D’Utilisation

The perfect Halloween handout: gummy bears! Sold the day after some protein “stix.” Which we sold the day after some protein bars. Which we sold the day after some electrolyte packets.

I guess it must be edible week here on Meh, hahaha!

Then again, the electrolyte packets aren’t food, exactly; they’re something you mix up and drink. So maybe it’s more accurate to say ‘Stuff To Put In Your Mouth Week’!

Hey, Meh copywriter here, just back from a mandatory HR session for writing that it’s ‘Stuff To Put In Your Mouth Week’ here on Meh. And honestly, I see my mistake very clearly now: every week can be ‘Stuff To Put In Your Mouth Week’ if you try hard enough! Hahahaha!

Okay, another HR session down, and my employment status hangs by a thread, so I’m going to just be real straightforward from here on out.

There’s a pretty funny story behind today’s sale.

These gummy bears are a product of France. And that’s important. Not because we want to promote some Francophile idea that things from over there are inherently better than what you get elsewhere. No, it’s important because France is in Europe. And Europeans write the date differently than we do.

In a lot of cases, this reveals itself immediately. You’re like, Wait, what? The 2nd day of the 25th month of the year? What the heck? But it’s less apparent when the date occurs within the first 12 days of a month.

Which is all to say: these gummy bears’ best-by date is 12/6/24. The label, however, will say best by 6/12/24. Because, again, Europe.

And btw, this is not just an inference we’re using to hawk gummy candies way beyond their best-by date. We confirmed all of this. (Also, just to be clear, I personally would eat gummy bears that were best by June tomorrow without hesitation.)

So take advantage of silly European date-writing conventions and get a bunch of cheap gummy bears! And let’s keep this week GOING!

By which I mean 'Stuff To Put In

[Luckily, we were able to take the copywriter’s computer away before he could type it again. We apologize to anyone he upset or offended.]