2-Pack: CanKeeper 3-in-1 Double Walled Beverage Insulators
- 16oz cans, 12oz cans, skinny seltzer cans; the CanKeeper can hold it all
- Keeps it cold!
- Sealable to avoid leaks and spilling
- Can it make a margarita: No, but it can keep a canned margarita good and cold all Thanksgiving long
Stay Chill
Maybe you’re trying to keep your beverage cold in the oppressive summer sun. Or maybe it’s the aura of heat wafting off the vat of bubbling oil you’ve got set up in the driveway to deep-fry a Thanksgiving turkey you’re worried about. Either way, these and CanKeepers will do the job. What’s more, they’re sealable, so they keep stuff from spilling. And that’s great because there’s no season in which you want a bunch of sticky puddles all over everything.
But there’s another benefit to keeping your beverage in one of these: they keep your drink choice a secret, so you can enjoy basic domestic beer while telling people that you’re quaffing a refined craft brew, and no one will ever know the truth.
Unless you give it away by saying something silly and uninformed.
That’s why we’ve gone on and provided a few craft-beer-related phrases for you to use that’ll have everyone thinking you know your stuff. For example:
“The green banana notes from the Nosferatu hops pair nicely with the dankness from the tuck-7 hops and the cumquat tartness of the melodeon hops.”
“It’s been rested on hornets, and the tang of the venom that transfers really complements the biscuity caramel backbone provided by the German Rätsel yeast.”
“It was aged in a rum barrel, that itself was aged inside the belly of a whale. But the barrel was removed surgically, so the whale survived and imparted just a hint of blubber to the finish.”
“No, it’s not only a hoppy pilsner; it’s also a happy pilsner. After all, yeast is a living thing, and the yeast that went into making this beer was given a very luxurious life and a pretty significant dose of mood-enhancing narcotics.”
See? Now you’ll sound like a regular IPA-loving dork.
So buy a couple CanKeepers and keep your beverages cold, safe, and free from judgment.
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2-Pack: CanKeeper 3-in-1 Double Walled Beverage Insulators 77
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A Few Words In Praise of Sharpie 0
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