2-Pack: Aduro Surge Shelf Multi-Charging Stations with 6 Outlets & 2 USB Ports
- When it comes time to recharge all those cool Christmas gadgets, you’re gonna want some extra outlets
- Each one of these has 6 outlets and 2 USB ports
- Plus surge protection
- Plus a shelf for your phone (optional use)
- Do they have a cute D&D aesthetic: no, so if that’s your thing, you should probably head to Mediocritee
Plug In
Mr. Bankin, sitting up in his bed, couldn’t believe it: there, in the corner of his room hovered a ghastly specter.
“Who are you?” he cried. “What do you want?”
The ghost hovered closer to him. “I am the ghost of Christmas Future. And I want you to change your ways.”
“Of course,” Mr. Bankin cried. “I’ll do anything! I’ll give my fortune to charity! I’ll volunteer to mentor local youth! I’ll cancel my orders to bulldoze the orphanage so that I might build another of my foul-smelling rubber factories! Just tell me and I’ll do it!”
The ghost laughed, and it sounded like a terrifying echo of itself, as if reverberating from somewhere else, another realm. “You think you can get rid of me that easily? You think I can be cast out before sharing the horrifying things your sad future holds?”
Mr. Bankin sighed. “Fine. If you must, tell me. What awful events await me on this current track of penny-pinching grumpery and general thoughtlessness.”
“On Sunday, when it comes time to open presents,” the ghost said, “you will find: a new tablet, a Bluetooth speaker, a pair of wireless headphones, a lantern, and several other electronics.”
Mr. Bankin waited a moment, expecting more. “I’m sorry, I don’t follow,” he said, finally.
“Don’t you see?” the ghost bellowed. “All of these items need to be plugged in to charge!”
“Okay,” Mr. Bankin said.
“That’s why I said you need to change your outlets,” the ghost said.
“‘Ways,’” Mr. Bankin said. “You said I need to change my ‘ways.’”
“No,” the ghost said. “I’m pretty sure I said ‘outlets.’”
“Well, that shouldn’t be a problem,” Mr. Bankin said, grabbing his phone from the bedside table. “Meh is selling a 2-pack of Aduro charging stations. They each have 6 outlets and 2 USB ports, as well as premium surge protection and a convenient shelf for your phone to rest.”
“Wait,” the ghost said, “you’re a rich guy, and you shop on Meh? The deal site?”
“Of course,” said Mr. Bankin.
“Wow,” the ghost said. “You really are a penny-pinching asshole.”
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2-Pack: Aduro Surge Shelf Multi-Charging Stations with 6 Outlets & 2 USB Ports 39
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All I Want Is To Brush My Teeth For Christmas 0
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One week until Christmas: 41
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Decreasing diversity of deal vendors? 13 -
Warranty Info 1 -
hi everyone. it's me, Carl 21 -
Time traveling assassins. 6 -
Uncomfortable. 2