18" M Cushion Shiatsu Massage Pillow (with or without additional cushion)
- It’s a pillow that gives back rubs
- If you choose the one with an extra decor pillow, you also get a 3ft extension cord
- Its theme song is “I Knead You Back”
- Massage pillow is made with Dual Core Memory Foam
- Here’s a TechCrunch review of it from 2015
- Comes with a machine washable cover by “celebrity designer” Jay Godfrey
- Wonder if he’s designed any celebrities we would know?
- Model: DLX7, so what are DMX and L7 supposed to call their collab album now?
Ahhh, There’s The Rub
You know the big type of pillow with arms that you lean against to read or watch TV? Some people call that a “husband pillow”. It’s an old name, and kind of a sad name, suggesting as it does that its user, having failed to secure human companionship, has settled instead for an inanimate hunk of polyfill from Bed Bath & Beyond. It’s as if anyone who reclines on such a cushion is one sexual dry spell away from ordering an anime dakimakura.
Why’s it gotta be like that? Why can’t a person just be propped up reading on a bomb-ass purpose-built pillow without suffering society’s judgment?
Who cares? The question is moot. Because instead of working to make society less judgmental, thought leaders in the beddingsphere were like “screw society, we’re making pillows better companions.”
Get lost, outdated “husband pillows”! The M Cushion Premium Plus 18" Massage Pillow is more like your sassy little friend pillow with benefits. It’s smaller, more stylish, and it rubs your goddamned back.
Sit back against this poofy little miracle and let its deep-kneading Shiatsu massage nodes work the stress right out of your body. (Statement not evaluated by the FDA.) They’re bi-directional, changing direction every 60 seconds, and there’s an optional heat setting too, for perfect muscle-soothing relaxation.
The promo copy on these boasts they’re “quiet enough to use without distracting others around you”, but let’s be real. If there were others around you, you would have them rub your back.
Of course, the M Cushion Massage Pillow doesn’t really replace your old “husband pillow” (any more than a “husband pillow” replaces a human spouse, if we’re being honest). So keep that boring old thing around to lean on while you watch boring old sit-coms, and sneak off with your M Cushion for more intense pleasure sessions on the side. (Actually on the lower back.)
Or — if you think you have the kind of relationship that can accommodate it — see what it’s like for all three of you to spend an evening together: You, your “husband”, and the M Cushion Massage Pillow stuffed in between. Sure, it’s unconventional. Yeah, maybe people will talk. So what? It’s a whole new world out there. Make your own happiness.
Not with an anime dakimakura, though. Those things are weird.
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18" M Cushion Shiatsu Massage Pillow (with or without additional cushion) 45
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