We’ve gone to the same person now for several years even as she has been at at least three different salons. The conversation is good, but it goes beyond that to having an actual personal connection. I’m not that pretty; there’s only so much that can be done with my hair anyway. Moreover, I don’t really like people, so once I’ve found someone I do like, I’m gonna be loyal.
I was wearing a very partisan t-shirt the first time we met. She liked it. We went deep the first time I sat in the chair. It was destiny.
@njfan It’s all good. If you were her, I would have felt bad that I hadn’t noticed before and maybe you’d said something earlier and I’d missed. I’m a meh evangelist and have other people here that I first knew irl. As it turns out, in the religious world, I was also a meh evangelist, in that I was meh at being an evangelist . . . but that’s another story.
Someone that won’t cut off more than I ask for. It’s long enough now that I can just trim it in the mirror and no one would notice if it’s not perfect. I need actual hair cutting scissors for this though.
I’ve had a few trims from hairdressers that are friends/family.
@RiotDemon Yes! I’ve had really expensive haircuts from recommended stylists who totally butchered my hair. I had a lady for over 10 years who would actually do what I told her. Glorious. But she retired. Thanks to Covid, I learned to cut my own hair and it looks ok. I’m good with it. And I never cut it too short.
@Fuzzalini my issue is that I have really long hair and for whatever reason, most hairdressers want to chop off a foot or more. I have to show someone what two inches is by holding my hair and very carefully pointing out that it shouldn’t be shorter than that. There’s been several times I’ve gone to just get the ends trimmed and I lose 6"+ of hair and it just hurts.
@Fuzzalini@RiotDemon stylists who decide to do what they think you should want rather than what you actually want are truly a nightmare.
although i have to say the worst and most puzzling experience i ever had was the only time i ever brought a picture to a salon of the haircut i wanted. i showed it to her and she said “i don’t think i can do this with your hair.” now i understand stylists can’t just replicate any hairdo on any person, but the haircut i asked for was much shorter than what i had, so no problem there, but also, the person in the photo…was me a few years before.
@Fuzzalini@jerk_nugget@RiotDemon Hah! Maybe more a statement about her skill than about your hair - obviously someone was able to do that! What amuses me is that whenever I go to a new person, they study my hair and then ask who’s been cutting it. And it always sounds faintly judgmental.
I actually have a wonderful person who understands my hair because hers is similar:
coarse thick Asian hair that has a bit of a wave and looks horrible if it’s cut wrong.
" stylists who decide to do what they think you should want rather than what you actually want are truly a nightmare."
Absolutely true. And the more expensive they get, the more they think they know best. That’s been my experience. Just do what I ask, how hard is that? Unfortunately, the cheap ones want you out of there faster. I like to have about 4 inches of layering in the back, and every time I’ve had my hair cut since my stylist retired, they give me about 2 inches because it takes less time and they say that’s enough. And then I give them a crappy tip. I don’t have the skills to do the layering, so I’ve learned to live without.
@Kyeh that’s so…rude? invasive? honestly it’s just a weird question to ask like, what are they gonna do about it lol. some stylists definitely have that vibe of …as though they’re really eager to shame you about doing The Wrong Things. but i’m like, hey, i’m here aren’t i? and i’m paying you the big bucks so what do you care? education is one thing, but sometimes it’s just a matter of money, time, access, etc.
three cheers for the good ones though! i’m glad we’ve found 'em!
@Fuzzalini i’ve definitely struggled in the past finding someone who will cut as much of my hair as i want/need. i think with me they get afraid bc my hair is so fine/thin. and you said it - how hard is it to do what a client wants? in terms of asking them to cut a little more? it’s such a weird thing…like imagine if your amazon shopper just delivered what they thought you should have instead of what you ordered, or if the guy painting your house chose a different color because he thought it looked better? if a waiter brought you a dish they thought you would like better? yet with stylists we’re supposed to be thankful for this sort of thing and express our gratitude with cash. i think not.
quality of work of course but, location is nearly tied. i am lucky enough to have two friends that i trust with my hair, but one of them works downtown now so i stopped seeing her. it’s too much anxiety sitting in traffic for ages and then having to repeatedly circle through the same traffic looking for a parking spot to parallel park in, getting turned around, stressing about either being late and/or having to walk a hundred blocks.
meanwhile my other friend who has been my stylist off and on since she was in beauty school opened her own salon, so i’ve been going to her ever since and never been happier. plenty of nearby parking on weekday late mornings, and since she’s the boss she could make the rules during the pandemic - i felt safer in there than anywhere else tbh. plus it’s the only drama free salon i’ve ever been to. but mostly it’s nice because she understands my hair. she just asks “make it pretty again?” and i say, yup! and then 15-20 minutes later i’m done. worth every penny every time. don’t have to stress about or even watch what she’s doing.
@jerk_nugget sounds so familiar. I have been going to my stylist since I was about 15. He is like my big brother as he has taught me about wigs, make-up and the joys of waxing. But like you, I sit in the chairs and he does his magic. I tell him how short he is allowed to go and if I want my hair colored, he picks the color(s) and the style. With one exception over all these years I always leave happy
@tinamarie1974 yes! i will let her know at the start if i want to keep it long and i always am like, PLEASE, my bangs! i can’t see! XD even though she already knows that part. then we just chat while she does her thing. my hair is very fine and as i get older it’s thin, too, and other stylists are too scared to do what she does, which is to cut a LOT off so it actually looks fuller. she cuts it dry, too. when i leave you’d think judging by the hair on the floor i had a pixie cut instead of hair past my shoulders. she just keeps going until suddenly she announces “there she is!” and i feel myself again.
@tinamarie1974 so worth it!! zero anxiety in a stylist’s chair is priceless. i always say that if i was rich, getting my hair done more often would be one of the number one things i’d actually spend money on. (and maybe getting driven there and back too ;)) i only go a couple times a year but it’s worth the drive and the price.
@jerk_nugget I told my stylist years ago that when I am rich I would build him a pool house on my property. His only responsibility would be to do my hair every day and then he could do whatever makes himself happy. Sadly, no pool or pool house just yet. He did ask me last visit when I was gonna build it
As far as cost, he tries to charge me next to nothing because of my drive so I just hide what I use to pay him here in STL in his station before I leave. Drives him crazy but it is the right thing to do
I discovered a person who does really, really good hair cuts at MD Anderson. Free for us. They were closed due to covid the last 3 times I have been there so my hair hasn’t been cut since June 2019. I am hoping to track her down next week when I am there and see if I can pay her privately to cut my hair (their hair place is still closed). She does exactly what you tell her to do.
When my kid flunked out of community college for failure to go to class (she was there to learn how to cut hair and do nails) I gave that women all the crap I had to buy my kid for those classes. She was thrilled as apparently the crap I had to buy was quality stuff (that cost a freaking fortune).