September Goat T & Cs
15Now that I am the Goat, I need to make a couple of things clear.
I won’t take responsibility for what is in your browser history (see that can light thing, or blue waffle)
Since I am not The GOD, I cannot take responsibility for acts of GOD (see Bahamas after Sunday)
I will make every effort to respond to all Blames and J’Accusations (see president of France) that are posted on the September blame thread
Upon advice of Bob’s my Uncle (family atty) I do not take responsibility for any crimes any of y’all may allegedly commit
Other than that, I think I am up for about everything else 
subject to change without notice; not valid in all states, commonwealths, or parishes; taking blame ends at 1059pm Eastern September 23rd,’19; void where prohibited
Oh, and can somebody teach me how to select the background picture? I have slides of my last vacation I want to share.
- 12 comments, 107 replies
- Comment
You totally don’t get to decide what we blame you for.
@Thumperchick let’s agree to disagree.
And thanks for the info.
@JnKL @Thumperchick i blame JnKL for failing to abide by the goatly rules and failing to listen to a respected customer service flask
@CaptAmehrican @Thumperchick show me the goatly rules. I think all of the goats made it up as they went.
And I listened. And disagreed. That is what makes this country great - the right to have our own opinion.
@CaptAmehrican @JnKL @Thumperchick True, but that’s the thing about opinions - they’re like belly-buttons, everyone has one. And some should be kept to themselves… So suck-it-up, Buttercup!
We all listened to your “opinion” as well, and decided that…it doesn’t matter!
And clearly math, time and calendars aren’t your strong suit. So I’m sure TC and Mediocrebot will keep track of when your reign/sentence will end.
@CaptAmehrican @JnKL @Thumperchick
Lev 16:20-21 You Take It ALL.
@CaptAmehrican @lseeber @Thumperchick that is a pretty impressive rule book. Been around for a while.
@JnKL @lseeber @Thumperchick almost as long as the Meh-cernomicon
I blame the scapegoat especially for the Bahamas after Sunday.
@JnkL picks the captcha photos
I continue to blame the scapegoat for this controversy.
@JnkL is to blame for this!
@mediocrebot Darn tootin’ @JnKL is!
@therealjrn I will be honest, I expected more controversy. I thought people would be really worked up by my trying to limit the blame I would take responsibility for.
@JnKL @therealjrn no controversy, just not accepting those terms.
@JnKL @therealjrn SOME of us are watching a hurricane. Dorian is currently 120 miles due east of me. Blame! You’ll get what’s coming, never fear. Also blame that a cat has decided he prefers my 3 layer chocolate cake to his food.
@OldCatLady @therealjrn really, can you blame the cat? The cake sounds wonderful and cat food is, well, cat food.
@JnKL @therealjrn We laugh. Hahaha!
@OldCatLady Isn’t chocolate deadly for cats? Or is that only dogs?
@Fuzzalini @OldCatLady Yes.
https://pets.webmd.com/cats/ss/slideshow-foods-your-cat-should-never-eat
@OldCatLady hope your cat didn’t eat enough to get sick.
I find that if you edit the discussion after you post it there will be a url entry box that you can specify the pic for the header.
I also would like to OPT OUT of of any binding arbaaaaatration agreements.
@thismyusername so noted.
@thismyusername Just feed the agreement to the scapegoat.
@JnkL picks the captcha photos
@narfcake @thismyusername I like that!
22 days, 22 hours, and 59 minutes goat? Well, I guess that beats the 3 or 4 days that @nolrak showed up.
@cinoclav well I have no one to blame but myself. That should read September 29th.
@cinoclav @JnKL September has 30 days
@cinoclav @JnKL @therealjrn And the day has 24 hrs.
@cinoclav @therealjrn @ybmuG I am sure y’all have a point, but I am not getting it.
@JnKL @therealjrn @ybmuG Not really sure what you’re missing. September has 30 days. Each day has 24 hours in it. Technically you stop taking blame October 1st at 12:00 AM but if you insist on having that free second than you can take it until 11:59:59 PM on September 30th.
@cinoclav @therealjrn @ybmuG Nope. Gonna take a whole day off. In fact, I have been invited to the beaches of Croatia the last week of September. I might take off on the 23rd, anyway.
@cinoclav @JnKL @ybmuG Trebat će vam vaše kontakt informacije u Hrvatskoj molim.
@cinoclav @JnKL @therealjrn wasn’t this the guy that said he wanted to be the scapegoat? Now we find out there are terms and limitations.
Just another day as a scapegoat in Gotham. Right, @JnkL?
@mediocrebot What the fuck is this shit @JnKL?
@carl669
@ybmuG My recommendation meant nothing.
@cinoclav @JnKL @therealjrn @ybmuG Since you didn’t get officially goated until Sep 2nd, your sentence ends Oct 2nd. You’re not qualified to have an opinion.
@cinoclav Not that you’re saying “I told you so”, but you could…
@cinoclav @ybmuG he kind of IS saying, “I told you so”, isn’t he.
@therealjrn look, let’s not get all worked up. Let’s give it a few weeks and see if it isn’t the normal amount of goat ness we are used to.
@JnKL Oni u Hrvatskoj imaju internet zar ne?
@therealjrn Guess they don’t on the beaches, where he’ll obviously be spending his time 24/7.
@cinoclav @therealjrn how are you reading that?
@JnKL copy and paste into translate.google.com
@JnKL @tinamarie1974 Speak for yourself. You all don’t know Croatian?
The party of the second part does not accept the modifications to the contract proposed by the party of the first part.
@blaineg I think the scapegoat is the party of the second part, but I totally agree!
@JnkL picks the captcha photos
@blaineg @ybmuG all I saw was party, party!
@blaineg @JnKL @ybmuG
/giphy party goat!
T & Cs … turkey and chicken? Taffy and caramel?
/giphy instructions unclear
@narfcake Toes and Camels
@JnKL
/giphy camel toe
@JnKL @narfcake that was risky
@narfcake
/giphy tongue and cheek
@narfcake @tinamarie1974 what is that a scene from? Asking for a friend…
@JnKL @narfcake I wish I knew…
@narfcake @tinamarie1974 reminds me of a really good date back in college…
@JnKL @narfcake @tinamarie1974 GIS says it’s from Vampire in Brooklyn
@narfcake terms and conditions
All lawyerly mumbo jumbo they stick in contracts and warrentees and the bottom of the screen in 2 pt font on commercials to say it’s okay (for them) this acid reflux medicine might cause chemical castration.
PS @JnKL I love that you voted yourself in then made rules. Very goaty of you. Makes you reign very interactive for us
@mollama That sounded like a serious answer. I’m blaming @JnKL for that.
/giphy tabby and calico
@mollama @narfcake EXCUSE ME! I want this to be VERY CLEAR. I did NOT vote myself in. I very carefully didn’t vote in this election of goat because I didn’t want to take grief from @cinoclav
I did want to create some controversy. just for fun, tho. @ybmug gets it. It is like s/he is in my mind…
and, mollama, I really want to be an interactive goat and have some fun this month. thanks for playing along!
@cinoclav @JnKL @mollama @narfcake @ybmuG you are doing a good job! Keep up the good work!!
/giphy You got this
@cinoclav @JnKL @mollama @narfcake @tinamarie1974 Yes, my first thought was, dang, we got this Mr. “I just want people to like me” and do we really want the Goat to be…likeable? Then you pulled your T’s & C’s crap and I thought, wait a minute! He went from being overly nice to a downright pompous jerk! Then I figured out what you were doing. Well, you wanted to make your Goatdom memorable and you have. And there’s a lot of September left, so I shudder to think what is next!
@JnKL @mollama @narfcake @ybmuG I didn’t care if you had voted for yourself and I wouldn’t have given you grief for it. You declared you wanted to be goat which is essentially the same thing.
As for this whole thread, I can’t say I find it particularly amusing. Creating controversy may not have been the best way to kick off your month. But you have plenty of time to redeem yourself.
@cinoclav @mollama @narfcake @ybmuG well I guess I am to blame for that…
I blame the scapegoat for all these rules and limitations and lawyerly fine print things.
/giphy lawyer
@JnkL is to blame for this!
@f00l yes, I am clearly to blame for these fine print things. No one asked before I was voted, so I wanted to get them in front of everyone. Besides, four exclusions isn’t so bad, right?
@f00l @JnKL Scapegoats do not make the rules.
@JnKL @lseeber
Am aware. But no harm in making that into a forum mantra.
@f00l @JnKL @lseeber I agree and I can recall at least one blame I did not accept when I served as Mistress GoaT.
It was very near the day my dog passed and it was a sick dog blame. I basically said, nope, won’t accept blame take your damn dog to the vet and get it fixed! I don’t recall anyone giving me any trouble (and no one really knew about my situation)
@tinamarie1974
Individualistic responses are encouraged.
Pushback is encouraged when it seems to be called for.
No worries.
I would say “you’re good”, but that’s just my opinion, man; and it doesn’t cover the situation anyway.
That fact is:
You were an awesome Goat.
/giphy “awesome Goat”
LEGOS! EGGOS! STRATEGO! AWESOME!
@f00l thanks!
/giphy awe shucks
@f00l @tinamarie1974 that was super nice of him! And he is right, you were a pretty good goat. I will say, I was very impressed by cinclavicle, also.
@f00l @JnKL @tinamarie1974 Oh my gosh you guys. I was just kidding and giving him a hard time because… scapegoat. Damn.
@JnkL picks the captcha photos
@f00l @lseeber Who says the goat cannot make rules? Other than you, of course.
@JnKL @lseeber
Me me me me and so many other Me’s.
/giphy me
@f00l @lseeber I may be outnumbered. Remind me, democracy or representative republic?
Because some strumpet in a lake, handing out cutlery is no basis for governing!
@JnKL @lseeber
Entertaining Constitutionalized Corporate Fascism.
See @snapster and @dave for more info.
@f00l @JnKL @lseeber However, if some moistened bint does lob a scimitar at you, you should probably take notice.
@dave @f00l @lseeber @snapster yes, this his company, isn’t it.
So weigh in mighty one, can scapegoats make rules?
He practically nominated and voted himself in but now he’s trying to rewrite the goat-stitution. Do we still have a chance to recall and get the Photoshop guy? Who the he’ll am I supposed to blame anything on right now…I’m so confused
@sicc574 no, no, don’t be confused. Blame away like you normally would and I will respond. If it falls into one of those six small exclusions I will let you know. It’s all good, really.
@JnKL @sicc574 it was 4 exclusions earlier, but you have proven math is an issue for you, so…
@JnKL @sicc574 @ybmuG
/giphy goat math
@narfcake @sicc574 @ybmuG there are SO many numbers, it is hard to keep track of them all. Plus it helps identify who is a) paying attention and b) CDO.
@JnKL @sicc574 @ybmuG You’re paying COD? Got it!
@JnKL @narfcake @ybmuG CDO??? Which one:
CDO Cagayan de Oro (Philippines)
CDO Collaboration Data Objects (Microsoft)
CDO Collateralized Debt Obligation
CDO Chief Digital Officer (various organizations)
CDO Chief Data Officer (various companies)
CDO Compagnia Delle Opere
CDO Chief Development Officer (corporate title)
CDO Commando
CDO Career Development Opportunities (various organizations)
CDO Clear Data Overrun
CDO Collaborative Data Object
CDO Common Data Object
CDO Chief District Officer (Nepal)
CDO Continuous Descent Operation (various locations)
CDO Central Dense Overcast (meteorology)
CDO Command Duty Officer
CDO Child Development Organization (Pakistan)
CDO Conseil des Ombres (French: Shadow Council; gaming)
CDO Community Development Organization
CDO Community Dial Office
CDO Community Development Office
CDO Centrale des Opticiens (French: Central Opticians)
CDO Chromosome Deletion Outreach, Inc
CDO Care Delivery Organization (healthcare)
CDO Controlled Decomposition/Oxidation
CDO Compulsive Disorder of Obsessiveness
CDO Capital Defender Office
CDO Compressed Day Off (various organizations)
CDO Centre de Danses Orientales (French: Oriental Dance Center)
CDO Come da Oggetto (Italian: As Per Subject)
CDO Clergy Deployment Office®
CDO Controlling DoD (Department of Defense) Office (US DoD)
CDO Central Dispatching Organization
CDO Communications Duty Officer
CDO Central Documentation Office
CDO Civil Defense Office
CDO Carbon Doped silicon Oxide
CDO Child Development Officer
CDO Central Disbursing Officer
CDO Chicago District Office
CDO Chief Disciplinary Officer (prisons)
CDO Corneodermatoosseous Syndrome
CDO Customer Direct Order
CDO Commercial Development Office
CDO Construction Development/Design Office
CDO Change Design Order
CDO Community Development Organizer
CDO Classified Documents Officer
CDO Change Data Order
CDO Control Document Officer
CDO Constrained Distortion Optimal
CDO Contested & Degraded Operations (US Air Force)
CDO Consent Dismissal Order (Canadian courts)
CDO Community Development Outline
CDO Coaxial Digital Output
CDO Callable Debt Obligation
@JnKL @narfcake @sicc574 HA!
I think he means super OCD (they have to arrange the letters alphabetically)
@narfcake @sicc574 @ybmuG it is like you are reading my mind!
@narfcake @sicc574 @ybmuG that is a pretty impressive list of TLA.
@JnKL @narfcake @sicc574
/giphy mind reader
Yup Bahamas are well beyond your goatly powers
Here’s the thing, people. This was all part of his plan. Go along for a few days, even seem agreeable, then drop some “rules” that he knows will get everyone worked up and then sit back and enjoy the show. And if some miss a meh-button click in the process, ruining an otherwise epic streak, all because they were distracted by all the kerfuffle, all the better. He thinks he’s the Teflon scapegoat…but we know better.
/giphy evil laugh
1 2 3 4 get your scapegoat @JnkL on the floor
@ybmuG he’s on to me…
@JnKL
/giphy got my eye on you
@JnKL @ybmuG At least this month’s scapegoat doesn’t suck as much as last month’s.
@JnkL is the reason they won’t bring back your favorite TV show
@mike808 @ybmuG that is a little harsh. I don’t think last months sucked so much as he called in sick quite a bit. If only he had laid down some guidelines right off the bat…
@JnKL @ybmuG If only goats didn’t bait and switch, the mehtizenry wouldn’t be so impressed with the underwhelmingness of the recent goats to feel compelled to … blame a scapegoat.
1 2 3 4 get your scapegoat @JnkL on the floor
@mike808 @ybmuG and I am clearly to blame…
I’m sorry. I was with you up till the whole GOD thing. What is this?
You were very obviously the Goat Of Demand or you would not be in this position. I think thou protest too much.
@unksol it sounded better in my head…
@JnKL I mean I guess you through a “The” into it but you were clearly the demanded goat. I don’t think we worship goats so much as eat them alive. There are an impressive number of dead ones active.
@unksol I really have no desire to be worshipped. I just want to make it to October as alive and sane as I started September.
@JnKL then accept thy schackles and the doom that comes with
@JnKL also if you pull a nolreck someone is proby going to call a wellnes check on you. I would avoid.
@JnKL one does not ask for power one simply receives it. Something about panda with noodles I think
@unksol not really into shackles, either. Check with @tinamarie1974. She seems into things…
@JnKL @unksol not the type that come with DOOM
@JnKL @unksol
/image red panda express