My greatest (visually interesting) fail was not caught on film. At least, not film that was stored anywhere. Walmart parking lot security cameras only hold the footage for a week, and aren’t released without a warrant. I know this, because my friends really tried to get that footage.
@DVDBZN alright, so, when my parents would pick me up from somewhere, if I saw them coming, I’d act like I was playing chicken with the car, they’d stop short, and I’d get in the car. So, after the opening of one of the X-men movies, still dressed up (I was Sabertooth), we drop by Walmart. It’s 3am at Walmart, so we really didn’t stand out to much. After we finished, we realized we were the only people in the parking lot. We started having cart races, and finally, our driver decides to pick us up. He’s on the opposite side of the lot, so I start running right at him. He keeps driving, I keep running. He keeps driving, I realize that he is not braking. He keeps driving, I jump, get one foot on the hood, but the opposite shin catches and I stumble. He finally slams on the brakes, I slam into his windshield. Fortunately, I protected my skull, both against the windshield, and the ground as I bounced back off the car. I sustained a vicious bruise to my shin, swelling to where it looked like I had a second knee, some scrapes on my arms, and bruising on my fingers from the fake claws jamming on them. The car had a few dents, the most obvious being the shin to the front bumper and the foot on the hood. That’s how I, dressed as Sabertooth, won a game of chicken against a car.
@cpierce @simplersimon
Right? If no one turns, then both participants lose. You only win if the opponent turns or brakes.
Glad to hear you can look back and laugh on it now, though. It could have turned out far worse.
Way before the internet or even home video, my guitar teacher used to have student recitals. My friends Doug and Ron and I were her older students so we helped the younger kids tune their guitars. (This was also before electronic guitar tuners.) the three of us had worked on a couple Crosby, Stills, and Nash songs. We were so busy helping tune other guitars that we never made sure ours were in tune with each other. We started playing and realized that our guitars had three different ideas of what an A was. But we were so young and nervous that we just plowed through. We were so petrified that after the first song we were just going to go ahead and do the next one. Before we started, Ron’s dad, rest his loving soul, stood up in the audience and said, “I think you might want to check your tuning.” I’m really happy no one ever had to relive those minutes.
During total eclipse, instead of watching it, two friends and I sat bare assed in fire ant hills. I think that was in the category of general stupidity.
The all-time winner is the person who “accidentally pushed the wrong button” in Hawaii, alerted every person on the island via social and broadcast media to an incoming ballistic missile, and told them to take shelter from a nuclear strike. It took 38 minutes for ‘someone’ to send a ‘correction alert’.
I was most internet famous for my hot tub on the internet. It was more pointless than an outright fail. The “wave to the cats” page was distinctly a fail.
Within the first day, one of the cats bit the flimsy cardboard hand that did the waving. For the next decade, the hand still waved, but it was on a desk where the cats could not see it. It was next to a Sun workstation with a noisy fan. The cats did not go near it.
My greatest (visually interesting) fail was not caught on film. At least, not film that was stored anywhere. Walmart parking lot security cameras only hold the footage for a week, and aren’t released without a warrant. I know this, because my friends really tried to get that footage.
@simplersimon
Story time?
@DVDBZN alright, so, when my parents would pick me up from somewhere, if I saw them coming, I’d act like I was playing chicken with the car, they’d stop short, and I’d get in the car. So, after the opening of one of the X-men movies, still dressed up (I was Sabertooth), we drop by Walmart. It’s 3am at Walmart, so we really didn’t stand out to much. After we finished, we realized we were the only people in the parking lot. We started having cart races, and finally, our driver decides to pick us up. He’s on the opposite side of the lot, so I start running right at him. He keeps driving, I keep running. He keeps driving, I realize that he is not braking. He keeps driving, I jump, get one foot on the hood, but the opposite shin catches and I stumble. He finally slams on the brakes, I slam into his windshield. Fortunately, I protected my skull, both against the windshield, and the ground as I bounced back off the car. I sustained a vicious bruise to my shin, swelling to where it looked like I had a second knee, some scrapes on my arms, and bruising on my fingers from the fake claws jamming on them. The car had a few dents, the most obvious being the shin to the front bumper and the foot on the hood. That’s how I, dressed as Sabertooth, won a game of chicken against a car.
@simplersimon I’m not sure that counts as a “win”…
@cpierce
@simplersimon
Right? If no one turns, then both participants lose. You only win if the opponent turns or brakes.
Glad to hear you can look back and laugh on it now, though. It could have turned out far worse.
@DVDBZN Looking at Star Trek, I consider it like Data’s “win” in Strategema: when facing an unbeatable opponent, a draw is my victory.
That time I answered “hi” when asked “how are you”.
/giphy cringe
I would not get internet famous for a failure. Mostly because my failures are not visually interesting or funny.
/image failure by catshirt
Way before the internet or even home video, my guitar teacher used to have student recitals. My friends Doug and Ron and I were her older students so we helped the younger kids tune their guitars. (This was also before electronic guitar tuners.) the three of us had worked on a couple Crosby, Stills, and Nash songs. We were so busy helping tune other guitars that we never made sure ours were in tune with each other. We started playing and realized that our guitars had three different ideas of what an A was. But we were so young and nervous that we just plowed through. We were so petrified that after the first song we were just going to go ahead and do the next one. Before we started, Ron’s dad, rest his loving soul, stood up in the audience and said, “I think you might want to check your tuning.” I’m really happy no one ever had to relive those minutes.
During total eclipse, instead of watching it, two friends and I sat bare assed in fire ant hills. I think that was in the category of general stupidity.
Luckily, I already did it, but it was before the web exploded ('96). Flame war with Harlan Ellison.
I’d imagine I have some first person GoPro footage of a spectacular ski crash or two.
The all-time winner is the person who “accidentally pushed the wrong button” in Hawaii, alerted every person on the island via social and broadcast media to an incoming ballistic missile, and told them to take shelter from a nuclear strike. It took 38 minutes for ‘someone’ to send a ‘correction alert’.
I was most internet famous for my hot tub on the internet. It was more pointless than an outright fail. The “wave to the cats” page was distinctly a fail.
Within the first day, one of the cats bit the flimsy cardboard hand that did the waving. For the next decade, the hand still waved, but it was on a desk where the cats could not see it. It was next to a Sun workstation with a noisy fan. The cats did not go near it.
Falling up stairs, choking on air. I’m pretty clumsy