Do you really hate someone this Christmas?

@f00l Secret Service tends to frown on anyone in their detail receiving items that explode…

@mikibell

They have a list of things they frown upon people in their detail receiving.

@PlacidPenguin
@mikibell

The Secret Service are not famous for having great on-duty senses of humor.

Growing up, I knew someone who came to their notice. Poss schizophrenic, diagnosed bipolar, sometimes full-delusional, not great impulse control, and a love of “humorous provocation”. And completely obsessed with politics. He could rant for hours and just be warming up.

He used to, when he was under 35 years or so, during his more delusional manic episodes, take all his $, hitchhike to DC, get a hotel room, and go to the Dem or Rep HQ and volunteer. After a very short time as he “helped”, it would be obvious that he needed hospitalization or assistance and the police and the Service would be called.

He was never violent or threatening AFAIK. Just obsessed and certain he needed to see the right VIPs immediately.

After that, the Service kept tabs on his location, and had a “friendly visit” with him every few years. They were never hostile, actually came across as friendly; but he stopped going to D.C.

@f00l So, now, what are you doing since you’ve given up that hobby?

@Barney

Not me this time.

To the best of my knowledge I’ve never met a Secret Service agent or employee, and to the best of my knowledge, they’ve no reason to find me “special”.

As Goat I apologize, since my not being delusional in quite the way may possibly make this story somewhat less entertaining.

@f00l

If you’d like to be visited by employees of other government agencies, I’m sure I can help you out…

@PlacidPenguin
For the moment I will decline your kind offer.

@f00l

Your loss.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@PlacidPenguin L

Might reconsider under certain circumstances. Are they possibly named Mulder or Scully? Or cigarette-smoking man?

Are these g-persons otherwise of special interest to a lay citizen who wishes to be of no special interest to the govt?

@f00l

Pfft. You think the government cares if someone wants to not be of interest?

@PlacidPenguin
Think no such thing. Just generally attempt to avoid attracting attention.

Here, I’ll be massively annoying and quote a bit of lit (short this time):

“The byways of espionage are not populated by the brash and colourful adventurers of fiction. A man who, like Smiley, has lived and worked for years among his country’s enemies learns only one prayer: that he may never, never be noticed. Assimilation is his highest aim, he learns to love the crowds who pass him in the street without a glance; he clings to them for his anonimity and his safety. His fear makes him servile - he could embrace the shoppers who jostle him in their impatience, and force him from the pavement. He could adore the officials, the police, the bus conductors, for the terse indifference of their attitudes.”

Not that I have any connection to espionage,save for the reading of popular books.

Apologize for the lit quote.

Apologize for not being a spy.

Apologize for being only partially delusional day-to-day.

@f00l I thought you were thinking of our calm (?) ex-scapenguin, for his campaign to elevate you to goatdom…

@compunaut
The byways of @PlacidPenguin’s mind appear complex.

Further study is needed.

@f00l I was visited by the FBI at work years ago.
/image FBI

My friend was applying to be a Federal Police Officer and they interviewed me.

@looseneck
I got a call from the FBI once. I had a FidoNet node and one sysop in our area appeared to have been bad. The guy getting investigated had bragged about hacking stuff but we thought it was just his BS. Anyway, I didn’t have any info to give or withhold. The agent joked with me about the x-files and went on to the next sysop.

IDK if the other sysops - some knew a lot about him and detested him with rage on top - gave the FBI agent info. I do know the the troublemaker (who had been an ass for years) - set his BBS on autopilot and vanished for a while. When he re-surfaced - a few years later to my awareness - he claimed to have been on the lam due to his incredible hacking, so I heard. I don’t think I ever laid eyes on him, which was fine. By that time FidoNet was seriously dying because internet, and that asshat guy vanished again. I never knew if there were anything to it.

@f00l It sucks when you can’t get closure to a story. Have you ever gone to the google to look him up?

@looseneck

I suppose I could. Don’t remember the name, but know someone who does.

@PocketBrain sorry, you’ll have to get a birthday or congratulations card instead.

@PocketBrain I tracked down who sells them in the US and it seems that company is “Joker Greeting”… but… the only one they have in stock with confetti inside is a recordable one… not the cool rock song one… the rock song one is available but has no confetti within.

https://www.jokergreeting.com/