Merkury Innovations SmartSurge Wi-Fi Surge Protector with 4 USB Ports

  • This surge protector lets you control (switching on/off & scheduling) all 4 outlets individually, which is pretty useful
  • It also lets you control the 4 USB ports as a group (not individually)…which seems a bit useless. Any ideas?
  • Control with the free Geeni app, any Alexa thing, or another dulcet-voiced home assistant
  • Connects directly to your Wi-Fi, no hubs or spokes involved
  • Protects up to 460 joule surges – the effects of any more joules than that are between you and your god
  • Model: MI-SW001-199 (Your mission, if you choose to accept it: Decipher this gobbledygook)
see more product specs

The Many Invisible Hands

On the one hand, we’re entering a new technological era where a surge protector that lets you control 4 power sources with an app or your voice costs about as much as a normal surge protector.

On the other hand, this new era is mostly about turning lights on and off.

On the other hand, even the early age of electricity was mostly about turning lights on and off. There weren’t many other uses for electricity in the early days, and a skeptic would have then said that this whole “electricity” hype train was overrated.

On the other hand, it’s not totally clear what useful smart home features are on the horizon. It would be nice to say “Alexa, make the bed,” or “OK Google, make this dinner party less awkward.” But the most difficult, laborious tasks of maintaining a home will likely remain manual for some time.

On the other hand, it’s pretty neat to say, “Turn the living room magenta,” and watch it immediately happen.

On the other hand, it’s pretty weird to sit in a magenta-lit room.

On the other hand, it just feels like something major is happening with this early smart home technology.

On the other hand, that feeling might be the dawning of a new surveillance state by the major tech corporations.

On the other hand, what do we have to hide from our technocrat overlords?

On the other hand, a lot, come to think of it.

On the other hand, whattaya gonna do?

On the other hand, nothing, probably. Might as well get this smart surge protector and hasten the advent of this new and possibly dystopian age.

And you bought...

  • 2232 of these.
  • Sold out at 7:04pm ET (see more)
  • That’s $54217 total.
  • (including shipping)

Who's buying this crap?

How many are you buying?