Dorcy Pro Series 1850 Lumen and 600 Lumen Flashlight Bundle
- One of the flashlights puts out 1850 lumens of pure light.
- The other features 600 lumens.
- Which will you get?
- Trick question: you get both!
- If you, uh, place an order…
- Models: 41-4312 & 41-4317. You’d think that the larger model number would correspond to a higher lumen count… and you’d be right!
It's All A Simulation
It’s not as though you’re going to see this sale and think, oh, how convenient, I’ve been meaning to patch up those few areas of darkness around the house.
Flashlights are items like plungers and garbage bags in that way; you only realize you need them in the exact moment they become necessary. Like, when the harsh winter winds knock out your power in the middle of the night, for example. Or when you lose something deep within your crowded garage.
Thus, it follows that the best way to sell flashlights would be to ensconce customers in total darkness, as this would put them into the appropriate mindset to best appreciate what the flashlights offer (namely, light). But, of course, we can’t do that…
Or can we?
Our first thought was something simple and DIY: we would request that you close your eyes for one whole minute and imagine that the lights went out. The problem with that is that, first off, it’s dangerous. Who knows where you might be when you decide to check Meh. But, second (and more importantly), we’re an online store, damnit! We don’t employ a hive of talented computer programmers so we can tell you to CLOSE YOUR EYES.
Thus, after sixteen prototypes and nearly 550 combined dev hours, we’re proud to present, the Darkness Simulator:
No, friends, fear not. Someone hasn’t punch a hole straight through your monitor or phone, revealing a lightless abyss behind it. What you see above is merely computer magic at work, nothing more than a strikingly real depiction of actual darkness! Is your curiosity not piqued? Do you not wish to know what lies among those deep virtual shadows? Well, you could… with this 2-pack of Dorcy Pro Series flashlights!
DISCLAIMER: Flashlights aimed at the Darkness Simulator will reveal nothing, save for more darkness. The darkness is simply too powerful. Do not stare into the darkness simulator for more than twelve seconds at a time. To enter fullscreen in Darkness Simulator, simply press and hold the ‘decrease brightness’ button on your keyboard, monitor, or touchscreen… but we do not recommend doing this, as the darkness may subsume all around it.