2-for-Tuesday: SaberLight Rechargeable Plasma Beam Lighters

  • You get two plasma-beam generators that burn hotter than fire because science
  • One hour charging via USB is good for 300 futuristic purple flare-ups
  • Butane, shmutane! You can even carry it on a plane (so they say - your TSA gate agent may vary)
  • Windproof and splashproof: try to blow it out for seconds of entertainment
  • Model: no model number (which will make it more difficult for gift recipients to find out how little you paid for it)
see more product specs

Building the Perfect Gift

Some gifts are easy. The recipient tells you what to give. Or they make it obvious in other ways. Or you’re struck by a flash of inspiration based on your deep intimacy with the recipient’s hopes, dreams, and desires.

That’s not why you’re here. You’re here because you have no freaking clue what to get at least one person on your list. You probably haven’t been thinking “lighters”. But let us explain why this two-pack of SaberLight Plasma Lighters rests firmly on the five pillars of perfect gifthood:

The element of surprise. Of course, the recipient shouldn’t be expecting to get this item as a gift. That’s the minimum standard. Better is if they haven’t heard of this particular product. Best is if they have no idea that an object like this even exists. Had you heard of plasma lighters before we started selling them? We hadn’t.

The fun factor. Burning things is fun, duh. Marveling at the way this little purple arc of plasma can burn things is fun, too. Beyond that, this lighter can burn all sorts of things that provide their own inherent pleasure. Fireworks. Candles. Incense. You get the idea.

Visual impact. Uh, yeah, the SaberLight’s got this one nailed down. Just look at it. Unless your intended recipient is a welder or a Jedi, chances are they’ve never held a glowing destructive beam in their hands.

Instant gratification. Does the recipient have to go buy anything else to use your gift? Do they have to wait for the right kind of weather, or time of day? Does using it involve hours of preparation? The best gift is one that they can enjoy in the time it takes to unwrap it and open the package.

Low low price. This is the toughest one. It’s easy to hit all four of the criteria above if your budget is unlimited. A personal submarine! A domesticated fox! A private performance by the Imperial Acrobats of China! The real challenge is doing it for whatever cash happens to be in your wallet. At two for $24, the SaberLight is the best answer to that question we’ve found yet. If you know a better one, we’d love to hear it.

Seriously, we’d really love to hear it. Christmas morning at our house is going to be awkward if everybody on our list gets the same thing.

So far today...

  • 82382 of you visited.
  • 35% on a phone, 6% on a tablet.
  • 5888 clicked meh
  • on this deal.

And you bought...

  • 954 of these.
  • Deal ended .
  • That’s $25634 total.
  • (including shipping)

Who's buying this crap?

How many are you buying?